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July Getting/Staying Sober and/or Clean vs It's really hot, I want an icecream!

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Captain.Heroin said:
People may seem like they are happy being addicted to drugs.

They are not.

They are in denial about how bad the obsession, withdrawals, and side effects are.

It's a part of delusional happiness.

I now prefer to be unhappy, even suicidally depressed, over temporary synthetic expensive happiness.
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Aint that the truth man, seems like as long as we stay sober things will slowly fall into place as long as we have hope and try.
When i am using, nothing happens, i have no will and drive for anything but to get through another day of misery while using.

I feel depressed 80% of the time when i am sober but fuck, it's a different type of depression... clear headed not clouded with toxins. I gotta stay sober
 
totach said:
I now prefer to be unhappy, even suicidally depressed, over temporary synthetic expensive happiness.
I like how you put that captain cuz in reality while in active addiction is the only time in my life where I didn't care to live anymore
I hope to never forget the feeling of seeing homeless people I'm the street and thinking to myself they are better off then me as long as they are not addicts
I feel like things are finally starting to fall in place after 5 months and I hope to never forget where I just came from
I needed to read something like that captain so thanx for that
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Any time man, glad to hear you are doing well. :)
 
After almost six months of trying, today is one month clean from heroin (or any other opiate) for me.

Had been hoping this his would be some kind of psychological turning point. But I've felt real precarious for the last few days. Nevertheless, I'm happy. I've never gotten a month clean since I started.
 
So July is off to a amazing start. My friend got me a really good job. I was even willing to work for minimum wage just to stay busy but I got a really good paying job and I get a car.
This is what sobriety does because if I was still getting high there's no way she would have vouched for me. She could have got me this job a while ago but I guess she wanted to make sure I stay clean which I did.
I feel very good about this and feel like I'm on my way to being a productive member of society ;)
 
In a few days I'll have 11 weeks clean from psychedelics and 3 weeks clean from weed! I feel blessed to be done with drugs and where I am in my life, which is the best point in my life I have ever been. I have so much good in my life and I'm never letting drugs take any of it away from me like they have before.
 
Good luck, devilsgospel. What are you walking away from?
 
simco said:
Good luck, devilsgospel. What are you walking away from?
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Drugs in general. Recreational use soon became using just to be functional (mostly benzos) which turned into full-blown dependence. Was trying to solve all my problems by getting out of my head.
 
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just got put on trazadone and adderall 60mg a day.... to replace my once rampant heroin and meth fixation.... I've been off meth for over a month, and am currently clean from my very slight heroin habit, had withdrawals up till about yesterday (so 3-4 days total withdrawal) .... im in the flirting , chipping phase... as i've been hooked on bth before , and everyone knows how weary we are to get back on the wagon with that one.
 
Hey there
i was away for a few days and just catching up
some great posts!!
kidspl-welcome, how was your day today?
simco, congrats on one month clean. That is so awesome. Totach, congrsts on the new job, how is it going?
phactor, one year and 2 months seems like a lifetime, way to go. Snort, congrsts on 11 weeks, CH, 8 months and 11 days-the longest you have ever had.. Huge congrats to you, erikman, congrats on 4 monhts
devils, one day is over, heres to day two!!

Im in week 6-good days and bad days, but i know for sure that i will not die of an overdose today. The biggest reason I decided to quit is because of my health. My liver, and possibly other organs have taken a beating over the last 10 years and i dont want to die. I cant help it if i get hit by a bus, but i can help not dying of an overdose or organ failure. And i really miss the pills. The rush, the high. But i beleive that eventually that will go away and i will feel "normal" one day.

I have gone through the last 6 weeks with just the help of the people here. Neversickanymore posted some amaixng links for me and i have spent a lot of time reading them, and herbavore posted some links and also wrote some things to me that have kept me clean more than one day-both of them have probably saved me a few times over and they have no idea. All you other folks have helped me more than you know, as well. Smetimes just o e simple, kind post has gotten me through an hour when i needed it most I know that i should be going somewhere else for more supoort-i probably need some professional help. But until i can make that happen, you fine people are what gets me through. I wish i could reach out and do something nice for each of you. But until we can figure that out, all i can do is say thank you and stay clean another day.
 
Props to you man. I definitely agree these are some of the most supportive and caring people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. I'm glad I found BL.
 
Good job Imtryin! I used to miss the rush and the high too, and when I was first getting clean I didn't think I'd ever feel as good as when I was high. But sober life for me has given me even better natural rushes and natural highs. Like when I had my arm around my girl just sitting together up in the beautiful Smoky Mtns looking at the majestic ridges. She got me a trillion times higher naturally than any drug did artifically. So it's like they say, when one door closes another one opens, and when I closed the door on drugs, a much better door opened for me. Hope that helps, good luck everyone!
 
I felt some hope when I read your post above. I have been sober for almost 5 months (4 + 21 days) but I don´t find myself having natural rushes.
I have my work, travel, have recently started swimming and eat well. The problem is that I feel that my endorphin factory has closed.
I talk about this very often. I used to have a very normal life using opiates (methadone) for years and I just can´t get back to it.
As much as I try, I force myself into doing things, like exercises. Everyone says it´s good and that it releases endorphin but it hasn´t happened yet.
I know I´m getting better with time, little by little but I was hoping that by now I would be okay.
So, congratulations to you all that succeed and for those who are trying. I´m sure we are doing the best thing, just have to feel it.
 
Been clean off meth since February 28.. I go to a program but I am not following the "no other substances" guideline as I still drink occasionally.

Still think about it every night.
 
I take it back, today is actually my first day completely free of all substances.

Technically I was still high on cold medicine very early in the AM yesterday haha.
 
Glad to see you are doing so well imtryin soon you can change your handle to Ididit
Thanx for asking how my new job is yesterday was my first day
It's not what I expected but I'm not going to be picky now I'm really happy to have a job let alone a good paying one
It's also on the books so I will loose my health insurance eventually which sux
Anyways I'm coming up on 6 months at the end of the month which is pretty cool
With my new job I prob won't be making a meeting in a while but if I feel I really need one I will go
Wish everyone a great weekend!
 
totach said:
Glad to see you are doing so well imtryin soon you can change your handle to Ididit
Thanx for asking how my new job is yesterday was my first day
It's not what I expected but I'm not going to be picky now I'm really happy to have a job let alone a good paying one
It's also on the books so I will loose my health insurance eventually which sux
Anyways I'm coming up on 6 months at the end of the month which is pretty cool
With my new job I prob won't be making a meeting in a while but if I feel I really need one I will go
Wish everyone a great weekend!
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Congratulations on beginning work man. I haven't worked in years and wish I had a job.
 
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