MAPS "I participated in the MAPS MDMA/PTSD study and it saved my life. Ask Me Anything"

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"I participated in the MAPS MDMA/PTSD study and it saved my life. Ask Me Anything"

This is my first response to the thread listed as the title in the "MAPS discussion" forum. I'm posting it here because I don't really do the reddit thing number one, and number two, I don't live in a location where this sort of therapy is legal yet.

But on to my question.


-How did you feel the MDMA changed the speed of therapeutic breakthroughs compared with cognitive behavioural therapy alone?
 
How much was the dose? and how many times did you do it?
 
Did you get a strong desire to repeat the MDMA experience? I know scientists claim that MDMA is not addictive; however, in my experience with MDMA and my observations of those who take it, MDMA can be extremely addictive. Compulsive use dies down to zero in time after permatolerance to MDMA sets in, though.
 
Are you all referencing this topic on reddit?

Hevasmyboyfriend said:
After witnessing the death of my 34 year old husband and another man in a violent accident, I was diagnosed with PTSD. I participated in the MAPS MDMA/PTSD study and it saved my life. Ask Me Anything


I have to add this information to the top. Two very important things:

I am only advocating the therapy I received. That means pure MDMA measured and administered by a doctor. Continually Assisted by very well educated and experienced therapist, including months of additional talk therapy. I know many of you are desperate, but I wouldn't want anyone to think I am advocating any kind of use outside of what I stated. Above all, Be safe.

My CAPS score, the score used to diagnose PTSD. My baseline score was 114. At end of study my score was 37. A score under 50 does not qualify for the PTSD study!

Yeah. I just learned that late last night.

I will answer all questions eventually. It's taking a long time. These are in depth and emotionally wrenching answers. This is so cathartic. Thank you again for the conversation.

Thank you all so much for this great conversation! I have to go pick up my daughter now but I will continue answering questions when I get time. So please keep asking!

Check out, support and talk to EVERYONE about MAPS.org

My PTSD kept me from grieving, which kept me from moving forward in my life, which made me want to die.

I participated in the Boulder MAPS study in 2014 and I am finally experiencing the life saving progress everyone told me was possible.

Please feel free to ask me anything about the trauma, the study, anything. I will try my very best to answer.

Here is a list of only some of the incredible benefits I've enjoyed:

-I'm no longer suicidal -I no longer have violent, sometimes murderous thoughts -I no longer feel "dead". Sounds weird, but I was convinced I was a zombie somehow. -I sleep well with much less frequent nightmare nights -I no longer despise happy people -I'm connecting with my family again -I was engaging in reckless behavior in order to feel something, anything at all. I no longer have to do that. I'm able to enjoy normal things I've always enjoyed. -I don't have sudden rage outbursts anymore -I no longer feel my death is necessarily going to happen very soon -I want things for myself now -I can see a possible future now -My flashbacks are almost non existent and rarely throw me into a panic anymore -My appetite is completely back -I'm still a bit hyper-vigilant but NOTHING like I was -I'm no longer TERRIFIED to step out of my door -I can hug people again -I'm actually happy
More here: https://www.reddit.com/r/mdmatherapy/comments/309qub/after_witnessing_the_death_of_my_34_year_old/


Hevasmyboyfriend is on reddit. She occasionally answers questions on the old topic. Those of you who reddit, perhaps she'll answer if you ask her there.
 
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My cousin Talullah Belle said:

I think what is even more important, or atleast difficult to find, is a therapist who is conditioned and well-versed in cognitive behavioral therapy and new methods but is open to drug use. I don't see a lot of people mentioning understanding HPPD more in terms of therapy and liscensed psychologists. It seems as if you mention HPPD and you instantly get branded one way.""
 
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