• Bluelight
    Shrine




    A memorial
    to Bluelighters
    who have passed away

RIP TheArtofWar

Very sad to hear, Condolences to his family. You were a great guy, Having only spoken a couple of times you were so good to me. The earth was a better place for having you.
Peace, Knightworrier.
 
Rest in peace, brother.

And my sincere condolences for his family and most of all, to his friends.

Death of a TAoW is truly a great loss to everyone who had been in touch with him either in real life or through the Internet.

Too sad I wasn't able to meet him when I did my trip to the USA since he had moved back to his family.

My heart really aches since while he had his own share of problems, which was a lot more than anyone should have to carry on their shoulders, he was always willing to help others no matter if it meant that he had to use a lot of dedication or time of his own.

He had something what we call "sisu" in Finland. Sisu cannot be translated straight to a one word but it means extraordinary determination, courage and resoluteness in the face of extreme adversity. Sisu is a trait of a person who would never say "I guess I won't even try since I would just fail doing it" but instead says "I'll take the challenge and get through it, no matter the odds".

That kind of trait as strong as in him of course takes it toll and the persons soul who has a lot of sisu is not a dim candle like the most of us, but is instead a truly brightly shining beacon of hope in to which we rest can trust as a guide while we navigate through our life.

As a general rule failure was not an option for him and when he decided to do something he did everything he could to achieve what he had set as his goals.

Sadly of course that was a double-edged sword since when things didn't work out as he had planned due the matters or circumstances he couldn't influence himself he would blame himself in vain for that.

I feared the worst when I couldn't contact him through our normal methods for a while and was truly worried about him to this day and finding out that he is gone forever makes me truly sad although I get some comfort as the uncertainty is gone.

Thank you Neon Black for informing us of his passing.

What makes me scared is that when we first started talking we were both nearly mid-twenties, had PTSD (although mine is from what I have seen happening around me while on my tours in Afghanistan and not what directly happened to me which makes it "easier" to carry with me) and Bipolar Disorder along with huge addiction to opiates, but both started working towards better way of life and atleast I got plenty of help from him and I hope I was helpfull to him.

The scary thing is that it could have been TAoW who now reads about death of me...

I don't know what happens to us when we die but I hope that TAoW has found peace in the end.

I'll lit a candle and keep silent for a while and then I start listening to a music I used to listen while discussing with TAoW and pour some scotch for both of us.

Godspeed for your journey my friend.

I hope that TAoW's lifelong attitude and behaviour towards others would set an example how we all should behave towards others - Helping and couraging others instead of judging and discouraging.
 
Angry with you.

Thought you'd be around for a long time. Knew you died years ago - couldn't face it, John. You and Jil - wtf?

Such a huge loss - such a lovely person. Sad to have another soldier down; was hoping you'd be around to fight with me. <3
I'll fight for you.
<3
 
WTF i been away from BL so long. I just saw this. He used to come into IRC all the time. Rest easy pal.
 
The art of war is some kind of a book by Sun Tzu.

I had spoken with the guy before his death on irc.

He said he had been worried about some kind of an associated risk that exists between injecting steroid & heroin in combination by power-lifters that causes aneurysms in the brain, although if on top of that he had smoked weed that could also freak him out.
 
omg did I even know about this one?

we used to talk on the phone, he had such a hard life :(
 
I remember when I sent you the book about healing from childhood abuse. Out of the same shame that tormented you, you had me send it to an empty apartment that was in a fake name. I remember picturing that book dropped through the slot of an empty apartment and possibly just sitting there unopened. You shouldered the fallout of that abuse as best you could. You remained a caring human being up to your last breath. A heroic accomplishment against all odds.
 
I never knew you, but the responses in your memorial thread here really make me sad that such a special person was taken away. <3
 
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