Pizzaguy123
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2014
- Messages
- 5
Hello everyone.
As you can see from the title my MDMA abuse is ruining my life but not as you might expect. I don't feel I have seen any psychological or physical change in me. I don't feel any different now to how I felt before I started taking it. The problem lies with health anxiety (which I've had since before I started taking MDMA)
I haven't touched it in over 5 years now. I worry constantly I am going to develop Parkinson's disease from my Ecstasy abuse. Everyday I go over it again and again in my head for hours at a time. I don't enjoy life anymore because I feel I have damaged myself.
Up and till now I will admit my feelings have not been 100% rationale due to the only real link of Ecstasy leading to Parkinson's was Ricuarte's famous study. Even though this study was proven to be void; I have still been worrying about it constantly.
I have now read something which scares the living daylights out of me. This is it:
http://www.plosone.org/article/info:doi/10.1371/journal.pone.0056438
My abuse started when I was 19 and lasted just over 2 years. I have worked out I have taken E around 25 times in total (in that 2 years or so) usually taking about 4/5 pills per occasion. 80% of my rolls were spaced out by at least a month but on occasion (4/5 times) I only left a weeks gap in between rolls (I know this is bad).
What do you guys suggest I do? I feel I am at a dead end with it all. I'm torn up with dread about what might happen to me and regret for using MDMA.
I just want a life free from worry. Do you fellow MDMA users worry about this?
Thanks for reading
PG
As you can see from the title my MDMA abuse is ruining my life but not as you might expect. I don't feel I have seen any psychological or physical change in me. I don't feel any different now to how I felt before I started taking it. The problem lies with health anxiety (which I've had since before I started taking MDMA)
I haven't touched it in over 5 years now. I worry constantly I am going to develop Parkinson's disease from my Ecstasy abuse. Everyday I go over it again and again in my head for hours at a time. I don't enjoy life anymore because I feel I have damaged myself.
Up and till now I will admit my feelings have not been 100% rationale due to the only real link of Ecstasy leading to Parkinson's was Ricuarte's famous study. Even though this study was proven to be void; I have still been worrying about it constantly.
I have now read something which scares the living daylights out of me. This is it:
http://www.plosone.org/article/info:doi/10.1371/journal.pone.0056438
My abuse started when I was 19 and lasted just over 2 years. I have worked out I have taken E around 25 times in total (in that 2 years or so) usually taking about 4/5 pills per occasion. 80% of my rolls were spaced out by at least a month but on occasion (4/5 times) I only left a weeks gap in between rolls (I know this is bad).
What do you guys suggest I do? I feel I am at a dead end with it all. I'm torn up with dread about what might happen to me and regret for using MDMA.
I just want a life free from worry. Do you fellow MDMA users worry about this?
Thanks for reading
PG
