am i a one off case ? i need support here

[ineedsomeanswers:(]

hi everybody im new here im having problems big problems and slowly but surely there ruining my life , i had a heavy night snorting mdma 1 gram to myself . id previously abused mdma approx 20 times in 5 months so i wasnt to worried .

then the night night turned and i stopped being able to talk or take in what anybody was saying i started analyzing everything and getting paranoid ,i didnt understand what was happening i started throwing up and then the comedown started i was locked in my head for 5 days not eating rocking back and forth sweating profusely.

i now draw blanks in conversation cant respond to people when i talk in general convo and if i do i have to think about it way to much and that leads to a silence i cant flow anymore whenever im around anybody i feel awkward i get overwhelming anxiety and i almost get paralyzed by my thoughts i just feel like everything i say is stupid and that what im saying to people doesnt match what there saying ive lost my personalty a great deal to i have no motivation to do anything at all i cant enjoy anything either i really dont understand wats happenning to me why cant words just come out naturaly why am i analyzing the body language of people and why do i think there judging me i dont understand this i cant relax please help

 

[Maya]

^hi ineedsomeanswers welcome to bluelight. I have experienced nasty side effects from what supposedly was mdma and suffered intensely. I would like to ask, when was the last time you took mdma? Did you test the product? What was the initial dosage? Srcindary dosage and at what duration of time? I took way too much in a short period of time and had nasty brain zaps after that night. I have recovered but it will take time. What you can do is to lay off any type of drug and start taking care of yourself like exercising, eating healthy, meditation, hot yoga and a positive attitude! In my experience, i have recovered but it took some time and required a lot of patience. Like i have adviced to previous sufferers, everyone is different so recovery will be different for everyone and you might recover only for a shirt time. Start changing your lifestyle and you will be joining the recovered team in no time!

 

[youngemadmirer94]

hi everybody im new here im having problems big problems and slowly but surely there ruining my life , i had a heavy night snorting mdma 1 gram to myself . id previously abused mdma approx 20 times in 5 months so i wasnt to worried .

then the night night turned and i stopped being able to talk or take in what anybody was saying i started analyzing everything and getting paranoid ,i didnt understand what was happening i started throwing up and then the comedown started i was locked in my head for 5 days not eating rocking back and forth sweating profusely.

i now draw blanks in conversation cant respond to people when i talk in general convo and if i do i have to think about it way to much and that leads to a silence i cant flow anymore whenever im around anybody i feel awkward i get overwhelming anxiety and i almost get paralyzed by my thoughts i just feel like everything i say is stupid and that what im saying to people doesnt match what there saying ive lost my personalty a great deal to i have no motivation to do anything at all i cant enjoy anything either i really dont understand wats happenning to me why cant words just come out naturaly why am i analyzing the body language of people and why do i think there judging me i dont understand this i cant relax please help

i could totally relate to you! especially the body language part that you talk about. I do the same thing and i think it's all been caused by some 25i or acid that i took.. still not sure what it was. What maya said is totally right.. try and meditate twice a day (transcendental meditation works best) exercise everyday outside and at the gym both work good, and also try some supplements like Tryptohan, Rhodiola, Fish Oil, B complex, vitamin D and C these will help you recover as well. Try and find things that u still enjoy doing to ease you through your recovery.. (playing cards with my girlfriend works for me) Just remember, your family loves you no matter what because they know how you used to be and your soul is still the same.. it's just going to be a slow recovery process for you to be able to recover the neurons in your brain, come to terms with your psychological condition and learn how to make the best of your situation.

try watching stand up comedy too.. a good laugh will make you feel more alive. ALSO if you play any sports, try and embrace that as competition tends to spark adrenaline that'll make u feel good! also maybe go camping? or try some extreme sports to make u feel alive as well and appreciate the beauty of life.

P.S. a cognitive therapist might help you too. My advice though would be to stay away from anti depressants or anti anxiety medication.. they will probably make you feel worse. stick to NATURAL stuff. try ST. Warts, it could help you brighten your mood.

 

[ineedsomeanswers:(]

i could totally relate to you! especially the body language part that you talk about. I do the same thing and i think it's all been caused by some 25i or acid that i took.. still not sure what it was. What maya said is totally right.. try and meditate twice a day (transcendental meditation works best) exercise everyday outside and at the gym both work good, and also try some supplements like Tryptohan, Rhodiola, Fish Oil, B complex, vitamin D and C these will help you recover as well. Try and find things that u still enjoy doing to ease you through your recovery.. (playing cards with my girlfriend works for me) Just remember, your family loves you no matter what because they know how you used to be and your soul is still the same.. it's just going to be a slow recovery process for you to be able to recover the neurons in your brain, come to terms with your psychological condition and learn how to make the best of your situation.

try watching stand up comedy too.. a good laugh will make you feel more alive. ALSO if you play any sports, try and embrace that as competition tends to spark adrenaline that'll make u feel good! also maybe go camping? or try some extreme sports to make u feel alive as well and appreciate the beauty of life.

P.S. a cognitive therapist might help you too. My advice though would be to stay away from anti depressants or anti anxiety medication.. they will probably make you feel worse. stick to NATURAL stuff. try ST. Warts, it could help you brighten your mood.

thanks although im a little to late on that front im on citalopram and today have been given diazepam ( valium) ive tried all i can its just getting the motivation to do all these things that could get me better , ive got cbt therapy and i had an EMDR session the other day which was really something , i just want the humiliating feeling to go im being extra hard on myself but i want to recover feel like such a ghost atm

 

[pentouch]

i use boose ,to get over this shit
when you are overanalysing ,everything sound stupid,like talking to girl that you like,being nervous,being stupid

 

[DETROIT*edm*JUNKIE]

This happend to someone I know..... they took a fuck ton of acid and mdma... did some damage to them.. major damage.. took them about a year to get back to normal but theyr notmal now