OP, to get back to your situation, if you're really concerned about coming off I would talk to doctor that can prescribe buprenorphine. It will really set you up for success if you feel relapse could potentially occur if there's a lot of discomfort when you come off methadone. Typically, most docs insist on scripting Suboxone (buprenorphine with nalaxone) but because you're coming off methadone any reasonable doc should be willing to discuss Subutex (just buprenorphine) as an alternative. Their reasoning will be that the switch from methadone to buprenorphine will be easier without the additional antagonist properties of nalaxone but that's bullshit, both methadone and bupe have much stronger binding affinity to your receptors for naloxone. Your reasoning will be that Subutex has a generic available which is way more cost effective if you don't have or can't bill insurance
Idk if we're allowed to discuss prices even for legal medication, but I pay
less than a third of the price using generic Subutex over Suboxone and I make a 30 day supply last 60. I pay practically nothing. Check out goodrx to get 50-70% off prescriptions. And NAABT has a great resource called treatment match that helps in finding a doctor.
I'm NOT suggesting buprenorphine maintenance. I would stabilize then do a 10, 30, or 90 day taper depending on your needs and what your doctor recommends. Buprenorphine withdrawal symptoms are milder than other opiates as well as opioids like methadone. I've seen people successfully tapered off bupe many times and their WD symptoms were easily managed with Seroquel at night and a muscle relaxer during the day.
Most importantly, stabilizing on buprenorphine will allow your brain to begin the process of normalizing. Unlike other opiates/opioids which are full agonists, buprenorphine is a partial agonist opioid. This is a really basic explanation, but instead of dialing your receptors all the way up like methadone is doing to you, it only dials them up half way. You'll start to feel normal again but you'll still be functional and when you're stable you can taper much more rapidly than if you were on methadone.
As far as using other medication to help you through this process, there are definitely some non-addictive options out there. But I wouldn't even bother with gabapentin... I've seen it used in rehab and scripted to people in early recovery and, except for that 1 in 50 person that it randomly worked for, everyone thought it was useless. Trazadone was also useless for me and many others... really awful dreams and it wasn't strong enough to make me sleep through WD symptoms. Seroquel was a godsend. I'm using IR to sleep still but when first getting off heroin/coke/benzos and switching to bupe I used the XR formulation and it really knocked out my anxiety and helped me rest. I was definitely groggy for a while until I got used to it, but I didn't even care. I used Remeron in combination with 600mg Seroquel because I was completely manic once I got out of detox but Seroquel should be plenty. Remeron is a great option if you want something milder, it will definitely make you sleep but more naturally and it'll take the edge off any anxiety during the day. Flexeral and Soma were good in a pinch for the worst WD symptoms but I wouldn't use them more than once or twice, I've seen them abused. NO benzos if any kind either, not even once.
Methadone just made me tired and I didn't feel good once I developed a tolerance. It really is just substituting one addiction for another, though it's a lesser evil. You don't have to worry about dopesickness and the drug scene and it helped me break the daily using routine but it didn't solve anything for me and I saw countless people stuck on crazy doses and just chained to methadone.
Any plans as far as recovery? You gotta do something... I did outpatient and AA. 12 steps aren't for everyone though. I would at least see a drug and alcohol counselor.
I'm just going on and on so I'll end here. But do keep us updated
