And here he remains...

[Whatdoido]

I posted a while back about my heroin-addicted brother and how he refuses to get help. I then found out my mother had some plans for taking him to what I was told was a mandatory drug rehab today. I find out he refused to get in the car and subsequently hounded my mother to "borrow the car to pick up drugs". I don't know which of them to be more angry at, my brother, for bringing the whole family down with him during this extremely drawn-out bullshit, or my mother, for not following through on a damn thing she has ever said regarding my brother. I've never been more tempted to cause physical harm to any one than I am right now. I'll probably get a lot of hate comments for what I just said, but right now I don't give a shit. Every. Single. Time. She says he's going to get help, that he'll be gone, that things will change, and it never ever happens.

 

[Gizzlefrtiz]

I feel for you bro.... There will eventually have to be a tough love scenario implemented upon your brother. Moms usually are the last to reach there "I'm done point". I wish blessings for U and your family. Just keep talking to your Mom and hopefully if Bro needs help like you say it will come before the other two options...


•:*¨¨*:••:*¨¨*:••:*¨¨*:•

 

[pasha]

my mother is just like yours so i definitely see why you're left frustrated. just keep in mind that you also have to be empathetic to the fact that heroin addicts have the highest recidivism rates and that 'getting help' isn't exactly always a solution. it could be one, but not always a definitive one. perhaps your mother has just come to terms with that.

i would suggest you try to get him help when he wants it. if he does, and it doesn't end up working try to talk him about maintenance drugs to attempt to improve his and your quality of life.

homeless -> sober living

 

[Whatdoido]

Thank you both for your responses. I agree that moms are usually the last to accept that, and that I should be more empathetic. But, when the person you're trying to show empathy towards doesn't want any kind of help, let alone empathy, it can be a bit hard to continue to put yourself out there for them... baoooozs, every time my brother is presented with an opportunity to take a drug of any kind, he finds a way to abuse it. We got him on a plan for taking methadone instead of heroin, and he found a way to get another doctor to prescribe him huge doses of it. Then when we got that squared away, he was receiving regular doses, but still acted as though he was doubling up. Turns out he was taking Finnergan(sp?) to amplify the methadone. He's been living in my parent's home for so long with not just creature comforts, but cable television, my mom picks up any kind of foods and/or sweets he wants. I mean damn, there are people working 3 jobs that don't live nearly as well as he does. My parents just don't understand when it has gone too far for some reason. I understand that he is their son, he's my brother and I wish things could be the way they were. But this has just gone on for too long... He agreed to go to rehab this morning, but he has done so countless times, how long it lasts remains to be seen.

 

[mattg]

My bro was also a heroin addict going thru the same thing. In n out of rehab I don't think he lasted a week. He stole from everyone till he eventually got caught for residential burglary when he was homeless . He's got 4 - 15 years we let him stay for 2 months now my mom got lawyer so he's getting out soon on probation . He said he deserves to be in jail n he's learning from it. No clue what will happen next. Now I'm pissed because my mom needs money and I can't make investments for my own future. Good luck op.

 

[cj]

There's no such thing as mandatory drug rehab. If he's over 18 then it's his choice and his alone. Also rehab isn't a cure all it has like a 4-5 percent success rate and it's really expensive so putting all eggs in that basket might not be a good idea. I think your family was on the right track with methadone. Don't worry if it makes him feel good that's not a bad thing. It is there to provide enough stability for him to start making changes. Also more pain and stress will not get him sober in fact it will probably end with him dead or in prison so I don't think kicking him out of the house will be any solution. These things just take time he will eventually tire of that life and be ready to get on maintenance or rehab. Forcing him into treatment will only result in throwing good money and hope after bad.

 

[downerhead]

I totally agree with crimsonjunk on all points.I was a heoin addict for over 20 years and I can tell you from experience that no rehab in the world is going to work untill the addict is sick and tired of the lifestyle and truly ready to quit.I did the methadone clinic twice and it can be a good thing while you're on it.I managed to land a good job in a field I liked and was stable and happy untill the death of a loved one caused me to say "screw it" and just starty using again.Tough love is no love and only causes bitter feelings and resentment and thus more drug use.You can't hate,scream,or shun an addiction out of someone you care about.I know your mother's enabling of your brother makes you mad but without some degree of compassion and help he will die.Period.The only thing he will learn in jail is how to be a better criminal and meet new dealers.Been there,done that.Hopefully your brother will reach his sick and tired point before he gets into some real trouble that can't be fixed.You may want to consider suboxone.That's what worked for me but only after I was sick and tirerd of being sick and tired.You have my best wishes and sincerest hopes.

 

[Gizzlefrtiz]

You have my best wishes and sincerest hopes.

Ditto