• TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | Eligiu | deficiT

TDS I Just Need To Post vs Welcome To the Fluffy Side

Still in acutes but they're getting really mild. Still, I had an important meeting today and had to takke some pregabalin to be able to go out and do it. Didn't want to.

Praying that by monday I'm out of wd so I can turn up to my meeting with my drug worker having come out of the other side of the detox. Still, here's a nice pic I took in Thailand at a hot spring for y'all.

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Just hung out with a good old friend.. got to see his darling baby girl.. wsp at rr is on for tonight.. life is good today.
 
had a tough day today and thank god it's over! I am leaving tomorrow for Whistler and won't be back until Tuesday. Time for some relaxation cause I FREAKING DESERVE IT!!!
 
Concerned about the amount of sleep meds I'm using. Need to cut them out or I will have to own up to my drug worker and deal with it together. Dunno why I'm posting this but it is the rambling thread so why not.

Anyway, university have decided to give me a by and just credit me for the module I failed the exam on in January (had been awake for three days smoking crack, shooting smack, eating benzos and drinking brew) based on the way I have recovered my performance after relapsing half way through the year. I had scored enough on the coursework alone to get me past the average needed for the module so they've just let the exam go.

It's a nice feeling to have started to get myself back on the right track and have it recognised by uni. Hoping to become a tutor for first years in the next academic year if I can keep myself on track. I'd love to be given the oppotunity to do that.
 
I hope you can get it under control owen, what kind of meds are you talking? By sleep I can only name a few. Are you taking them due to an actual sleep problem? If so perhaps see a doctor because the ones you are working with aren't helping you in the correct way?
 
I'm taking them because I've just done a buprenorphine detox. I cut off dead at 24mg about a month ago and managed to collect pretty much all the meds you can throw at opiate withdrawal to get through it (lofexidine, buscopan, promethazine, pregabalin, zopiclone, zolpidem, etizolam, diazepam, melatonin, quitiapine), and I have a diazepam script at 25mg on maintenance whilst I do the detox. The diazepam script is going to be chopped to 20mg in 10 days time, then 1mg every week from there. I've stopped taking all meds for the withdrawal except I'm still using sleep meds (quitiapine, zopiclone, melatonin, etizolam).

The issue is just being able to cut out primarily the etizolam ASAP because otherwise I'm going to gain a benzo tolerance above my script. Fucking with an anti-psychotic like quitiapine carries it own set of risks whoever you are but it will sedate me without really carrying any risk of physical dependance other than making it difficult to sleep without it now I've been using it to get me though the detox. The zopiclone runs out tonight anyway and the melatonin I am happy to take for a more extended period anyway as it carries very low risk. The etizolam needs to stop going on top of the other meds pronto so I don't boost my tolerance above my script even though I'm only using it at night. Basically the long and short of it is that I've used a wide variety of meds to deal with coming off such a high dose and I've slowly removed all of them but I've hit a bit of a wall trying to remove the sleep meds.

Tonight will be 200mg quitiapine, 4mg melatonin, 15mg zopiclone and probably 3mg etizolam. Basically I need to stop fucking with all that shit other than the melatonin in the next week or so otherwise I'm stepping in to the territory of creating another addiction out of the back of dealing with the opiates. It's complicated.....gah. If I start using above my benzo script for much longer it's going to complicate it when the reduction kicks in. I guess the next week or so is going to be a real test, I need to move to natural sleep soon otherwise I'm going to be on sketchy ground again.

Anyway.....I've cleared the fucking opiates which is a start. On naltrexone now as well (which I know is technically an opiod blah blah but it's a blocker that has no activity at the opiate receptor and is actually thought to help kickstart the body's endogenous system as well somehow)
 
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Goodluck to you. I'm not too familiar with the others listed personally but I am familiar with using Etiz as a sleep aid (1mg to start) which turned into a year+ long habit. All stemming from hoping to use it as a sleep aid. Really wishing you the best of luck. I do know how hard and scary it is getting off of opiates, lack of sleep, getting off sleep aids, benzo addiction, etc. <3. I really do urge you to try to cut out the etiz as soon as you can, from personal experience.

Congrats on cutting out the opiates btw.
<3
 
yay can't wait to see!! I'm going to Vermont in August :D
 
Woah!! Well if you are up for meetin up lemme know dolly!!
 
I'm so upset and disappointed with myself, I'm just hoping this is a phase will pass soon!!! I'm trying so hard not to let myself react on these selfish feelings.:(

I'm in need of any one on one PM's.
 
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Not the best pic I took on my mobile but I love the mountain view!! I took this pic while I was on the bus on my way to Whistler. Ugh! i miss that place already!!
 
You should move to whistler maya, so i can come visit and never leave :D

aww you are too sweet mr NSA. I would love to live there!! I was actually thinking about it last weekend but I am not sure where I'd work though LOL
 
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