A kid wakes up one morning and says:
"Dad, can I bunk off school today"
His dad says: No
Kid. "Please?"
Dad: "Oh, go on then"
Next, the kid says: "Dad, can we go to the seaside"
Dad: "Look, I've let you bunk off, we're not going to the seaside"
Kid: "Oh Please"
D: "Oh alrght then"
They get to the seaside, and he sees a donkey.
K: Can I have a ride on the donkey dad?
D: "Look, I've let you bunk off, I've taken you to the seaside, I'm not letting you have a ride on the donkey."
K: Pleeease?
D: "Oh alright then"
The kid has a ride on the donkey and he decides he likes him so much that he wants to buy him.
K: "Dad, can we buy the donkey?"
D: "Look, I've let you bunk off, I've took you to the seaside, I've let you ride the donkey, I'm not bloody buying him as well!"
K: Pleeeeeaaasee??
D: Jesus, alright then.
The kid decides he wants to call the donkey Wanker.
K: Can I call the donkey Wanker, dad?
D: Fucking hell, I've let you bunk off school, let you go to the seaside, let you ride a donkey. BOUGHT the bloody thing. You're not calling it Wanker.
K: Oh go on dad, pretty please?
D: Sod it alright.
So they take it back home and tie him up in the yard. The kid wakes up in the middle of the night and sees the donkey has run away he shouts:
K: "Dad! Wankers off!"
D: "Look, i've let you bunk off, I've taken you to the seaside...."
I'm here all night.