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How did you get into the more "hardcore" drugs

Around the same time I decided I'd try marijuana, I also decided I'd try everything else once or twice just to see how it went, to see if I'd get addicted, that kind of thing. Currently, aside from the occasional MXE shot and the regular beer or two, I'm not using any other substances. But if I were offered something like meth or weed by a friend again I wouldn't turn them down.
 
I got into most drugs because of my friends - we were all normal, nerdy dudes, but somehow I got in with a 'rebellious' section of smart people, if only in the sense that we smoked weed...I very much doubt, without having this foundation of marijuana smoking friends of mine, that I would have ever tried most other drugs, including LSD, ecstasy, mushrooms, coke, etc., all of which I did exclusively with these old friends I'd been using good old weed with for years. %)

I also developed an amphetamine addiction for a number of months in two years of school due to advanced coursework - I wasn't lazy but I was smoking a lot of weed. Amphetamines were the only drug I did which my friends didn't directly influence me in doing. However, it could be argued that since they all introduced and inducted me into smoking weed years before, they acted as a sort of gateway to trying other stuff, but that's me moving the blame from myself. Fact of the matter is, all the drugs I did with my friends were either not dangerous, like weed, or I just didn't use them more than a few times at most - amphetamines were my own bullshit. It wasn't curiosity, I felt like I should use them to help me with school, although, in retrospect, I clearly didn't have to use them, especially if I had just reserved smoking for the weekend.
 
verso said:
^
Science could be the biggest enabler of all; I watched some shit the other day with Stephen Hawking where he all but conclusively proved that God or a god could not exist; He was like, "So does God exist? I do not think so. Before the big bang, time did not yet exist, and so there would have been no time for God or a god to make the universe."

It made so much sense, and was so unbelievably depressing, that I just had to go right out and spend my last $20 on dope.

Science, man... leaving no doubt in your mind whatsoever of your complete and utter worthlessness since 1900 B.C. :\
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Science is the real gateway drug. I got into all drugs by reading the pro and cons and making a somewhat informed decision.
 
Freshman year in highschool, I got codeine for a sore throat and took a good amount. Felt so cozy lying in bed watching tv, it was one of the happiest moments back then. Didn't really equate it to the drug till the next year when I fell in love with weed and became that huge stoner. Found some more codeine from friends, stole some from my house (not in use but would be noticed if missing) and drank the bottle then filled the bottle with corn syrup ;) My friends all drank everyweekend but I don't like alcohol because it's a shitty high with a bad hangover I rarely drank after the novelty faded. Two of my best friends had ADHD and sold/fronted me the majority of their script, I used to sell it to support my weed habit and occasional stim use before I had a job. Friends sold me some benzodiazepines and vics and oxy. Friend found her dads coke. Cooked up a rock, loved it, laced some weed with it to. But I had no real dealers except for weed and lsd. That was highschool, towards the end I binged on acid alot and took dxm every so often; learned a lot from that. First day of college finally found a reliable coke and heroin dealer and emptied my back account in a month. Now I'm on bupe still truckin through my first year at college.
 
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ghostandthedarknes said:
Curiosity and Availability.
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This. Have always been greatly interested in the effects substances can have on a person, I don't really use drugs anymore but if something that I never tried were to become available and it sounded interesting I wouldn't hesitate to buy.
 
For me it started when I recieved IV Dilaudid in the hospital after I broke my hip. It was off to the races after that.
 
I got offered heroin because I mentioned I was interested in trying it on some other drug forum. Of course I said yes and also asked for needles/syringes. Why not go all in?
 
Science damn you!!

You wouldnt believe how casual I was going from oxy to heroin. Casual as fuck brehhhhh.
 
define "hardcore" please...

Anyway I remember vividly how I got into coke. I took a lot of xanax, went to a party, had some drinks and woke up on the couch the next day with a gram of coke on the table. Okay, not very vivid but that's what happened :D

My friend's cousin met his girlfriend in jail (ha) and we all went to her house I'm pretty sure to score other drugs. She had like 20 negro babies running around and started to smoke meth. Didn't even shut the door or anything, didn't bother me much at the time since I didn't have kids. She offered some meth and we obliged...

Pills, peer pressure or maybe I was curious?

Heroin, I guess because of lack of other opiates available at the time...
 
me said:
experimentation with hydrocodone.
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I should note that for me, "hardcore drug" means "addictive". For a while in high school, I only took psychedelics and sparing marijuana. So I would add in alcohol (like the 9th compound I tried) to hydrocodone as parts of my 'descent' into 'hardcore' substances.

ebola
 
Same story as most. Weed was free for me in high school because my boyfriend was a dealer. Never really got into it heavily, just here and there to act stupid and funny. I couldn't really understand stoners because I didn't like the way it knocked me out. Also, I hallucinated twice on some good shit and it kinda freaked me out. I continued to smoke weed socially, maybe only twice a year, because it was there so fuck it. When I was 25 I got a job working the graveyard shift at a medical laboratory. The hours were 10:30pm - 7am Monday through Friday. At that particular time, I really had my hands full with a lot of things happening in my life. My dad was dying of cancer and I did my best to help my mom out with him, I was taking my 4 year old son to and from preschool 3 times a week, I took my 1 year old son to physical therapy once a week because he was a delayed walker, I went to school for medical billing twice a week, and I had the full time graveyard job 5 days a week. One day I was complaining to my friend about how I was having trouble staying awake at work. That was my introduction to cocaine. "Just do a couple of lines of this if you're falling asleep and you'll be good." I started out only using it on the nights I went to both school and work, which was twice a week. It only took 3-4 months for me to have a full blown addiction that almost sucked everything out from right under me. I spent most of my paycheck, most of my child support, traded my food stamps for it, flirted to get myself some when it was at a party... I eventually blew holes into my septum, and I still have 2 of them. I kept getting sinus infections and urinary tract infections, therefore I was calling out of work way too often for their liking, and I was laid off. I quit school, coke was way more important. On the last night of my using, I had an 8 ball next to me in the car and my 18 month old baby in the back seat. It was around 11pm and I got pulled over. I don't have a criminal record so the cop talked to me and let me go for a busted license plate light. I could've lost my children that night and I thank God for whoever was watching over me that night. In my insanity, I took my baby home, put him to bed, asked my mom to watch him, and left to do the rest of my bag. After that night I was sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time. Withdrawal from pure powdered cocaine is the most intense shit I've ever experienced. While I was praying for a merciful death in my bed, I Googled "how to stop using drugs", and I found Narcotics Anonymous. I'm grateful to that program for helping me through the most trying time of my life. I was able to stay clean through my dad's death, though it wasn't without difficulty. Eventually my NA support group abandoned me because I had dated their sponsor for a few months and broke up with him. Guess their loyalties belong to him. I ended up isolating and relapsed on meth with 2 of my friends who left NA and continued using. I snorted 3 fat lines, took 4 hits from the pipe, and rubbed some on my gums. My friend kept warning me that it wasn't like coke and that I needed to calm the fuck down. I ended up blacking out 3 times and throwing up profusely over the next 24 hours. I couldn't even hold water down. I'll never forget the 3 day crash that followed. Fuck that! Another friend of mine that I shared that horror story with told me that I did way too much and to let him slam me with his meth. Idk why I agreed to it, I guess I was just done feeling the way I felt and wanted to escape, even if it was only temporary. That night I learned what sunshine and rainbows feel like flowing through your veins. Holy mother of God! Anyway, I do that recreationally now. I'm sure it'll turn into a problem that I'll deal with later, but for right now, I'm able to balance mom life and fun time. I only do it with the one friend I trust.
 
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eyeballzsack said:
Here i am thinking about how i got into doing more hardcore drugs. i realized it was a result of getting caught with cannabis back in the 10th grade. now I'm in the 12th grade and have moved onto bigger and badder drugs. i realized it was a result of getting tested for cannabis that made me move onto harder drugs that would not stay in the system nearly as long as cannabis, chiefly, heroin and pills. i have decided that the gateway drug for me was drug tests. anyone else feel the same?
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That's pretty much exactly how I got into hard drugs... In 10th grade I got caught with weed and my mom started drug testing me, so I just started doing pills because they got out of my system faster.
 
I tried grass and realized that everything I heard about it being bad was absolute shit so i figured they must be lying about it all... yeah not the best assumption there.
 
Curiosity. Once i started to really like drugs i wanted to give most of them a test run. I also became tired of eating psychedelics/MDMA up to 3-4 times a week and just smoking cannabis wasn't enough. So then i picked up benzos, opiates and cocaine.
 
When I was 18 my corner store started selling me beer, which went from a 40 ouncer of malt liquor at night, and slowly snowballed to at least 2 and often 3 over the course of a day. This happened over the course of a couple years, and was gradual. Before that at the time I smoked pot daily and that was it, although I had used mushrooms, vicodin, and adderall one or 2 times over the high school years.

Seems like after I achieved a certain point in my fledgling alcoholism, I just lost any of my early inhibition trying to keep me from harder drugs. Its not like I went out and said "I want to try meth today." I got drunk one night at a party where some guys were passing a pookie in the garage, and a friend at the time told me to go in there and try it, I know I wouldnt have done it sober. The energy explosion from meth was amazing, and my production almost doubled at work the next day. I went from doing the bare minimum to nearly matching the best worker on the yard. I started using meth first thing before work many days to bolster my numbers and soon came to also love the way the days flew by, and the money I saved by not eating off expensive food trucks everyday.

Eventually I was caught getting high in the yard, but I took my new found enjoyment of meth with me to my next job. I started staying up several days at a time and then crashing hard, typical meth user giveaway. By now Im buying 5ths of hard liquor everyday and a half gallon on Saturdays, and my alcoholism has moved onto strong physical dependence. I was alternating between meth and booze binges and was going down hard, started stealing from friends and family and whoever else to support the meth habit and I landed in jail for theft in 2008. My girlfriend of 8 years took our 2 babies and finally left me. My depression spiraled out of control, and I was blackout drunk or working on it much of the time for the better part of a year. During this time I would use whatever drug I could get my hands on and led to my first experiences with lsd, ecstasy, angel dust, benzos, coke, crack, heroin, and probably others I cant even remember. Thank god I never fell into addiction with these drugs, probably because I couldnt afford a full blown habit but there was a lot of use/experimentation and I was fucked up on something more often than not. I was kicked out of my house in the winter and survived in a tent at a homeless encampment for 3-4 months, coming out to panhandle for booze, meth, less often food.

I honestly cant remember what was the last straw. I came crawling back and begging for a place to stay, and my family forced me into rehab for a medically supervised booze detox. I remember the DTs were so bad at first I experienced visual hallucinations on top of the garden variety tremors and anxiety, and they had me on an anticonvulsant of some type. On the 7th day, after I was accepted into a county paid 30 day bed, and had detoxed enough that the tremors were about gone. For some reason I jumped the wall at night and made a run for the liquor store a stones throw away. Stupidly I had shared my plans to do so with a couple of the other fellows in rehab, and one snitched me out; they hit me with a breathalyzer later on which I failed, and told me Id have to leave in the morning. I drank perhaps 2 more pints of liquor over the next couple days, realized with my family watching me like a hawk, that I was either going to have to sober up or go back to the bum lifestyle. I survived 3 years or so on just pot, until this May when I quit smoking pot. And sadly relapsed into sporadic alcohol use. I have binged hard a few times since then, which have been even worse than my hardest times in the past, and yesterday initiated a tapering program although I dont even think Im physically dependent enough to really really need it. I am shaky but nowhere near my previous intensity. I had perhaps 3 shots over the course of the day, a mere fraction of my common intake, just so that Im not cold turkeying. Im sick and tired of it and am just ready to drop booze and embrace mary jane.

Honestly Ive IVd hard drugs and still never found them as hard to quit as booze. And I would have never even touched any hard drugs or ruined my life if I hadnt fell into alcoholism at such a young age.

Also similar to an earlier post, my best friend growing up was admited to rehab for weed and literally came out addicted to speed.
 
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tl;dr
Well, at least I did one more step in admitting to myself that I really ruined my life at my own will...

I sought isolation from the school crowd when I was 14 years old. I started with dextromethorphan, but it wasn't something I could take daily for a long period of time, so when I once bought codeine-based medicine when there was no DXM at a local pharmacy, I soon found out that was that. A year later or so I met my first girlfriend that had been addicted to morphine and then heroin. And no, it wasn't her who introduced me to "hardcore" drugs. She knew I took codeine and didn't want to give me morphine. I just used her contacts and after I got morphine myself, she couldn't really do anything. I'd take it anyway, probably even more if she had dumped me. Still, I don't regret those times, when we were both spaced out in love as if no one else existed but us. As I was naturally interested in chemistry, it didn't take long for me to make more contacts after I had landed in the capital, which was the only city with powder heroin at that time. And I had no choice but landing in that sin city as there had been no morphine in my city for like half a year, and my hydrocodone wasn't enough to replace it (quitting was no choice back then...).

As I look back, at some point it became my obsession to try different opioids, mostly 4,5-epoxymorphinans and morphinans, for the sake of feeling these little differences between them. And then I could also go back and lose myself in the dissociation DXM used to provide me with, but then it was much clearer with ketamine and analogues. I don't know if drugs like MDMA, MDA and alike can be considered "hardcore", but definitely morphine-MDMA/MDA-ketamine combos were hardcore. In the end, after I half-awoke from the narcotic amok and decided to go on "self-maintenance" being said "no" by the specialists in my city and in the capital, methadone wrecked me. And it was then when I started smoking weed heavily to alleviate pain from the never-ending withdrawal, I had never earlier used weed to help myself with W/Ds, going cold turkey I'd always just use BZDs which are another "hardcore" drugs I got terribly addicted to...

It was at the same time when I started using DXM. The first 10mg temazepam pill I took when I wanted to calm my nerves to call a girl. A young and yet not ready for the kind of love I aspired to girl. The girl I hated for this for many years after. She was one of the stars in the school surrounded by a lot of boys, one of the alpha females in the school who turned out to be just thinking about love the way I prematurely started desperately longing for ... It shook me just as a lot of my peers' behaviours and views shook me, and it was then when I partially realized I'm "different". I grew up too fast and when my peers grew up too, the past events made me unable to function normally with them.

I don't mean only sex, it was a few years later when I was like 17 and dated a 15 year-old, and then I saw how teenage girls think about love. It's romantic, it's perfect, but it's only in their minds. When I realized that, I stopped, and decided that for me it would be making love, but for her it would be a completely new experience possibly changing her life by changing her view on different things relationship related. To be perfectly honest, after that first falling in love at 14 I got to be too cautious with these things. It was all when my first girlfriend was abroad and actually had left me saying I deserved better when she was leaving. So that 15-year old girl would have been the second girl I would have made love to. With the love between my first girlfriend and me being the most romantic, euphoric and at the same time delicate, now I know I actually kind of hurt that 15-year old girl letting one of my male peers who knew nothing about the importance of intimacy and caring deprive her of her virginity. And I would have deflowered her.

I got my first estazolam pills from a guy I'd got to know via the Internet, an abstinent tweaker with much similar problems to mine - unable to live in loneliness. This acquaintance of mine suffered from terrible insomnia and could get as much estazolam and lormetazepam as wanted to. Well, a bit off-topic, the story of his life as he has told me would make a great book... Then I started getting scripts for estazolam, lorazepam, and temazepam myself from a local clinic. The way I was doing it may leave some at a loss for words, but it really was that simple. I, a 14-15-year old kid, went to the clinic and left a slip of paper with the name of the medicine and the name of the patient at the reception desk. Of course I wasn't the patient, but as a matter of fact it was all 100% legal, no scam. The prescription was ready to be collected on the day after. Estazolam was prescribed for an insomniac patient, so I could switch it with requests for lormetazepam, lorazepam, nitrazepam, midazolam, and triazolam. Temazepam* was for an elderly patient with anxiety, so I could switch it with alprazolam, diazepam, oxazepam, medazepam, bromazepam. Lorazepam was for a person with epilepsy, I didn't switch it with anything, actually it was my BZD of choice, so I was mostly leaving slips of papers with request for this particular BZD and estazolam. Luckily doctors in Poland are now more hesitant to prescribe BZDs, so no teenager with similar problems to my past problems will hurt themselves. When I got to my 4th or 5th psychiatrist, I was already addicted to BZDs. She just kept prescribing me more and more antidepressants, whatever I wanted, and I manipulated her into switching me from lorazepam to clonazepam (very bad mistake). I lived quite close to the Eastern border, so there was plenty of phenazepam, gidazepam, and benzobarbital available on the black market. It was so easy to carry on with my worst addiction... Now as I look back, I really blame my then psychiatrist for switching me to clonazepam. I was the patient suffering from addiction, not thinking clearly, she was the doctor, and she was there to help me, to cut my dose, and not eventually get me on 6mg of clonazepam a day scripts. If she couldn't manage it, she should have sent me to an addiction specialist. :\

With stimulants I never had any problems, although I used different kinds of them when I was already addicted to opioids and benzodiazepines. It wasn't until last year when I started using amphetamine heavily. It was after I got off methadone and was in the end placed on Suboxone by the very same doctor who had kept refusing to get me on the maintenance programme in the past. I couldn't cope with "sobriety", Suboxone vs. methadone is like heaven and hell, methadone dulled my mind and on buprenorphine my thinking was clear. I felt as if I had woken up from a twilight dream. This doctor also immediately started cutting my clonazepam dose when I was hospitalised. From 4mg to 2mg right away, then later to 1mg, and 0.5mg, but it was too fast for me, and when I was officially off, I was actually still taking clonazepam, but I had to get it from the black market (I was kind of mad at myself that I stopped visiting the previous psychiatrist from whom I could get legal prescriptions for more clonazepam than I really needed). Anyway, amphetamine gave me confidence and I was really doubting myself despite Suboxone, literally when I looked at myself in the mirror after snorting amphetamine, I saw a different person - attractive, self-assure of his virtues etc. Without amphetamine I would see a sad guy no girl would look at. It had been then like a year since the end of my latest relationship, and, it's not a thing I'm proud of considering how the world is nowadays, I can't face this world all by myself without a woman, there always had to be someone. A lot of amphetamine and weed + BZDs for comedowns for a couple of months until I went to England (where I smoked weed too because I got terribly depressed after 2 weeks looking for a job with no success, I started thinking that something is wrong with me if I can't get a normal job).

Now I'm back in Poland and I'm freaking out unsatisfied with Suboxone, it's only better when I've got a break from it to get the old opioid calmness and warmness, or when I smoke weed all week long to the point I feel more sober having smoked. I've yet to visit my programme as I was given Suboxone for ~5 months before I went to England. I should still be in England and I don't quite know how to go there after a few months of not having to see all these methadone dulled faces. I just don't want to. I'm running out of Suboxone, so soon I will have to or I will finally kick it as it's not doing it for me and I've got enormous cravings in my head. When I got off methadone, there was still an alternative - Suboxone. Now I know there is nothing else I can be offered to fight mental cravings and at the same time I'm afraid that Suboxone withdrawal will be as hard as methadone withdrawal was. Thus I'm also afraid that I will soon fully relapse on morphine, and stronger opioids are 1 step or at most a few steps from morphine. Even having codeine one can do magic, so this really is a big concern for me.

* Temazepam being recognized worldwide as the second most dangerous benzodiazepine after flunitrazepam was actually then seen in Poland as a weak anxiolytic, weaker and easier to get than diazepam. Only recently I heard from one person that he was prescribed it for problems with sleeping. I never heard before of it being used as a hypnotic.
 
weed, for a number of different reasons.

the people it brought me into contact with, the reasons I was in contact with them, the less and less fucks you give with each smoke.

all adds up to be a gateway drug in reality, but nobody shoves you through that doorway

that was strictly out of my own curiosity and now its just out of an asinine attempt at re-establishing that initial curiosity, instead of just being able to satisfy my desire for it

don't get me wrong, I still like to smoke weed too much to bad mouth it, but sometimes I wonder how my life would be different if I actually did just say no

probably boring as fuck to be honest
 
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