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Thread: Ouch, my balls suddenly swelled up and they hurt!

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    Ouch, my balls suddenly swelled up and they hurt! 
    #1
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    I have been w/ my girl for 3 years now and our sex life is great... till the other day.. I was throwing my hog in her, we were banging at a good pace, in and out, then all of a sudden my balls swelled up like softballs.. My balls hurt so bad, my girl was trying to put ice on them for the swelling, but that didn't work.. Next we tried a heating pad, but my balls got all raw and I even have burn now from the heat.. So now I have huge red balls, and no clue why they blew up.. I am going to see a dr today about my nuts, does anyone have a clue about this, have you ever heard/ seen this? Please help
    [ 15 January 2003: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
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    #2
    Bluelighter skydancer's Avatar
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    Get your balls to a doctor NOW!
    I had torsiotestis once, although this was due to biking; the surgeon was just in time to save my balls. Another dude on the same isle lost one, the blood flow was constricted and they can't go too long without it.
    Ofcourse, perhaps there's nothing wrong in your situation, but please let a professional check it out ASAP.
    [ 09 January 2003: Message edited by: skydancer ]
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    #3
    Bluelighter Sweetpea's Avatar
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    you dumbass...it's retribution for your crude vocabulary
    could just be that you were allergic to something and has nothing to do with sex
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    #4
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    Originally posted by Sweetpea:
    you dumbass...it's retribution for your crude vocabulary
    could just be that you were allergic to something and has nothing to do with sex
    Sorry thats just how I talk, didn't mean no disrespect to anyone..
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:25.
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    #5
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    My father , a M.D told me that this sounded like a russian disease,"Rotchacockoff" ...very serious.
    Balls swell up like cantalopes, turn blue, then fall off.
    I don't know if you were serious or not, but it sounded funny as hell. If you were serious, sorry. Sounds rough, and raw. If you were joking, hell that was funny. HAHAHAHAHAH
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    #6
    Bluelight Crew anna!'s Avatar
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    My Dad (yeah, I know this is a strange thing for me to tell you about my Dad) gave himself some kind of inflamed testicle the other week while he was ten-pin bowling. Same kind of physical exertion-related problem, I'd imagine. He went to his doctor right away and was prescribed anti-inflammatories for a couple of weeks and to the best of my knowledge, it all got better. Then the poor bugger had an accident on his bike and tore a whole lot of soft tissue in his knee, but that's a completely unrelated klutz story.
    Go to your doc.
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    #7
    Ex-Bluelighter *CrystalMeth Bunny*'s Avatar
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    Everything else aside, I don't think it's the best idea to apply a heating pad, or ice for that matter DIRECTLY to your testicles.
    I'd opt for putting a dishrag between the two (the source of heat/cold, not your testicles).
    All I can think of is maybe you whacked 'em a couple of times (or a couple hundred times) in the heat of the moment, and didn't notice until it was too late. I'd see a doctor, but it's usually never as bad as you think with these things.
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    #8
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    shit!i cant stop laughing!
    no disrespect though
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    #9
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    Good news, the Doc said I had a some sort of blood backup in my nut... I have to rub my nuts for the circulation better, so I have been ordered to rub my nuts.. This is great, I feel like I have 2 softballs in my pants, and they are soo fucking tender, I could bearly put my pants on, and my doc was screwing around w/ my dick and stuff too, making sure he's ok... Thats the worst, pullin your pants down for a Doctor, mine was inside out, he had to put his finger in my ass and poke my dick out the front, felt like I had a vagina.. Thanks for all the help, my balls feel alot better now, a little red, and still huge but I have them in a sling, should be better in a few days...
    Thanks again
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    #10
    Bluelighter skydancer's Avatar
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    w00p!
    Congratz!
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    #11
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    Wow your sex is huge balls as well, what a coinsidence.
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    #12
    Bluelighter eddi spgeddi's Avatar
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    oh fod im so stonned
    rofl
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    #13
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    lmfao......."throwin my hog in her"
    This was definatly the highlight of my day!!!! Thank you!
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    #14
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    Your cock is in a sling????
    All I can think of is American Pie II when the kid super glue's his hand to his cock and his dad picks him up wearing the giant bandage diaper!!!
    hahahhahahhaha!
    um, hope you feel better soon...
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    #15
    Bluelighter Yesterday's Avatar
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    oh my god
    laughing my ass off reading this outloud to my little sister its so fucking hilarious
    one more reason I'm glad to be a girl and sans balls
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    #16
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    Originally posted by TADD4D:
    I was throwing my hog in her, we were banging at a good pace, in and out, then all of a sudden my balls swelled up like softballs..
    Did they swell up as you were having sex? And if so, did you finish or stop because of it? I'm just curious...
    also, kinda off the subject, but I just wanted to let you know you have a really romantic way of wording things
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:27.
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    #17
    Capsule
    at least you don't have elephantitis
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    #18
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    LMFAO!!!!!!!!
    I'd pay for shit that makes me laugh like this!
    Last edited by ChemicalBeauty; 13-02-2004 at 19:28.
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    #19
    Bluelighter JustinTime's Avatar
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    ROFL
    No offence but your story's just so fucking funny I can't stop laughing. Hope you're balls are doing better now.
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    #20
    Thumbs up
    Check out Tad's profile
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    #21
    Ex-Bluelighter *CrystalMeth Bunny*'s Avatar
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    Make sure that you say a doctor, not just some scary hobo wearing a labcoat down at the train yard.
    The differences are subtle, but many.
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    #22
    Bluelighter tourette's Avatar
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    That's fucking hillarious. Fuck.
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    #23
    Bluelighter Average Whiteboy's Avatar
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    Originally posted by TADD4D:
    so I have been ordered to rub my nuts..
    FUNNIEST QUOTE EVAR!
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:28.
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    #24
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    Originally posted by TADD4D:
    he had to put his finger in my ass and poke my dick out the front, felt like I had a vagina..
    WTF??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
    This post has made my day!!
    ~*Vamp*~
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:29.
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    #25
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    I talked about this post at the bar last night...
    hahahhahaha... too funny (you know, now that you're alright and stuff)
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