BottleDryer
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2012
- Messages
- 100
My first time trying a hybrid strain , Sour Diesel (90% Sativa - 10% Indica, if I'm correct)
So there I was, In some strangers garage, well my ex's best friend and her boyfriend's garage to be exact, it was my first time there and meeting them.
The garage was littered with pimped out American muscle cars, a 2010 Dodge challenger a 1960's Chevy Chevelle and Charger and a few super bikes thrown in just for fun. Jeezus.
So anyways, it was quite a scene and it made for a pretty cool / laid back environment, the company was pretty laid back as well, they seemed very easy going and friendly which was great.
Me and my ex at the time had been touring the states for the summer. We started from the top, Michigan, and toured all the way to Louisiana and then back up again and decided to crash at my ex's friend place for that one night.
.........
A side note, I've been an avid weed smoker "back in the day" (highschool) and up to a few years after until I started University, which by then I stopped smoking weed altogether due to the negative side effects I began to experience every time I indulged.
Now , every time I smoke (which is very rare) I always experience this "negativity", an overwhelming sense of fear and paranoia, increased thought process practically to the point of "hyper-analysis" (If that's even a word) and just a general sense of feeling dazed and confused during and after. Every time I indulge I have to consciously (actively) force my self into thinking positive and just forcing my self to calm down and avoid an imminent panic attack, having to do this every time is just not worth it in my honest opinion and just leaves me feeling drained and depressed.
I don't experience any positivity with weed anymore like I used to when I first started. Maybe I just smoked myself out ?? lol. Maybe it's just past and current environmental and social factors (setting, mood (subconscious), company, ideas etc.) that have had an influence in my waking life. Anyways.
..........
So, there I was, sitting on the cement floor of this garage (the floor was pretty cold) in a circle with my ex , her best friend and that friends boyfriend.
Me and my ex were both tired from the drive up to Detroit and thought , "yea, some weed would be good right about now" (me not thinking that the last time I had smoked was years ago. It's "just weed" right ?...)
A decent sized bowl was packed in a glass pipe and we begin to pass it around. I remember feeling excited and eager to finally smoke some good bud with some good people in a positive setting. Even though I was nervous because naturally I am a bit of a shy person, and slightly "self conscious" I tried to look past these traits of mine and shrug them off as something minor and irrelevant at this point and stage in my life.
I remember taking two huge hits, and as soon as I exhaled on the second one I remember thinking to myself " ohhh shiittt here we goooo" . I had to sit down, but I was already sitting. There was this huge rushing feeling , the "come up" was practically instantaneous, something I had never experienced before with weed. Usually the come up is gradual (5+ minutes), but with this Sour Diesel stuff it was practically instant. Like within a minute.
It felt like this "haze" of a rush, (even almost like a "Salvia" type rush, but instead of being catapulted backwards into your mind and then into another reality like with Salvia, I just stayed there in my mind under this veiled smokey confused haze). It's like I was looking at everything through a an "electric fog". My body felt charged with electricity, tingling and filled with energy, not "constructive" energy but this dormant , stagnant electricity under my skin and nerves. I could feel a tingling in my spine and in the back of my head. Like as if my very molecules, atoms, particles, muscle fibers and hair were vibrating.
At first (what felt like the beginning few minutes... 3-10 min ?) I found all this, kind of "interesting" and maybe even "amusing" because it was new and unexpected. As soon as those first few minutes of mercy expired, I began to run into trouble. I remember looking at everyone through this electrically charged fog behind my eyeballs and within my own skull, as if everything and everyone was standing still, everything was silent, quiet or so I perceived. It felt like I was holding my breath (maybe I was) and that everyone else too was holding there breath (maybe they were), staring at me with concern and fascination. That moment, when I first looked up at everyone was weird and funny now that I think back on it.
From there, I remember everyone began talking (as if the moment of stillness and silence never happened, existed). I couldn't talk. I could only perceive. It quite literally felt like I had been strapped with a straight jacket (maybe I was) and had my mouth taped shut. I have no idea what everyone was talking about , even though they were sitting inches away from me. Then, at one point, my ex yells out to me and kind of physically shakes me, saying to me and everyone "What have you done to my boyfriend !!?" , in a joking manner. I remember just looking at her then back at everyone and just trying to produce this vague "smile" (as if I knew how to coordinate any sort of muscle movement at this point). Soon after that, I just began to stare at the floor I was sitting on. I remember staring so intensely at this cement floor that I began to see these little patterns and intricacies in the cement. The grains , bumps, holes, cracks all started to make these complex patters that I started tracing over with my finger.
Sitting there cross legged, tracing over microscopic complexities in a cement floor in front of a group of people can seem a little weird (if you know what I mean).
I must have been tracing over this pattern that I had found and stuck to for what felt like an eternity. Too scared too look up.
By now, this fear and anxiety had manifested itself within me. I kept repeating in this skull of mine, that there was no reason to look up, that I shouldn't look up, for fear of the "unknown" (what unknown??). I felt that if I did look up I would be "judged", that my fear and anxiety which I was experiencing would be exposed to the rest of the party, so as long as I kept looking down and tracing this pattern in the floor, no one would be the wiser...
Now, the anxiety, fear and new acquired paranoia had reached it's peak and did not seem to want to leave me any time soon. Another problem, I began to feel a pressure in my lower abdomen, like I had to go urinate. I started to focus on this feeling (while still looking down and tracing these invisible cement patters), the more I began to focus on my physical being (my body) , the more aware and the more concerned I became about it. I noticed my ass beginning to feel unusually cold. It felt so cold that it felt hot (you know when you run your hand under some water that's so hot it feels cold ?, well it was like that). I began to get extremely paranoid, nervous and self conscious at this point.... "Did I just shit my pants??!" , "Fuck, I really hope I didn't piss my pants right now!..." . I started to lean and fidget as discretely as I could, trying to get a better look of my "underside". There was no way I could tell.
Now while this was all happening (my act of trying to get a better look). To the outside viewer, it looked like I was twitching quite badly.
Maybe an hour and a half had passed at this point ? (there was no way I could tell, time had no meaning, I was just simply "stuck" there).
So within all this twitching, discrete detective work and maddening paranoia, someone says "J !!, What's your name ??, can you hear me J ?, look at me dude" . I remember thinking to myself, "did someone just call my name ?" , so I look up (as if in autopilot) , blankly starring the general direction of from were I assumed the voice came from . I was met with "tractor beam" like vision from my ex's best friend. She repeated again, "J , what's your name ?" . I found this funny because I thought they were "playing with me" , as if it was a trick question.... it was... The more I began to think about it , the more complex it became. I began to panic (though tried my best to not show it), I mustered out in this lost, pathetic low pitched voice "jaaayy". ("Yes, I answered correctly, now leave me the fuck alone" I thought to myself). I remember being asked more "trick" questions but just zoning them out and covering them all with a classic blanket statement, 'Maaannn, I'mmm waayyy too higgghhh rriighhtt noooww".
After another half hour or so ( I now assume ), someone says " Lets all go sit on the couches in the living room"
At that moment, I became overjoyed that we were going to get up and leave this cold environment and onto some comfy warm couches (maybe I could then just pass out and wake up back to normal). But, at the same time, I thought to myself "Fuck, I can't get up, what happens if I really did shit my pants ???!"
Somehow I remember sitting on the couch (don't know if I did this under my own power / will, or if someone helped me there).
At this point, I could feel like the "high" slowly started to diminish (still extremely slowly to be certain). I think everyone at this stage accepted that I was gone and in my own world and just started talking amongst themselves while I just layed there like this brain dead mass of paranoia and nothingness.
I finally get the courage to say something under my own free will , "Were is the bathroom ?" . Everyone is startled by my sudden "awareness" (awakening ?). They point it out to me.
Getting up from the couch was insane. It felt like my legs had been asleep for years and made out of jello. I slowly began snapping back and for between reality and still being high. (I felt schizo a couple of times). Stumbling over to the washroom, I hear a girls voice hysterically saying "Wow, he's really out of it !!" and laughing. At this point, I had enough and that didn't bother me, I was more concerned and fixated on sobering up and being done with this "high".
I must have spent another hour in the washroom. Splashing cold water on my face and starring in the mirror. Repeating this process like some sort of ritual.
Every so often, someone would come knock on the door and ask me if I was ok, all I could say was "yea" and just continued to stare at myself in the mirror. After realizing and assuring myself I never had taken a crap and pissed my pants, I felt like it was safe to go back to the couches and rejoin the company.
By the time I left the washroom and walked back to the couches I had almost sobered up.
"Welcome back J !, you Ok ?" (everyone's starring at me). "Yea, I'm ok, man that was FUCKED UP" .
I just layed there, watching some thing on the tv until everyone passed out (including me).
_________________
Ever since, I swore to myself I'd never touch weed again.
(Though I have had a toke here and there, trying to figure out and understand if I could get over my anxiety while under the influence of some really old and crappy bud that I had laying around (no idea on the type strain)). Never went too well, but then again it wasn't like the Sour Diesel nightmare.
So I think I might be done with weed. (Unless I had an opportunity and access to various types of strains to "test" and figure out what works and what doesn't, but unfortunately, no one here has any clue/idea on what a "strain" is, or if it's indica or sativa or even a hybrid... it's a shame.)
So there I was, In some strangers garage, well my ex's best friend and her boyfriend's garage to be exact, it was my first time there and meeting them.
The garage was littered with pimped out American muscle cars, a 2010 Dodge challenger a 1960's Chevy Chevelle and Charger and a few super bikes thrown in just for fun. Jeezus.
So anyways, it was quite a scene and it made for a pretty cool / laid back environment, the company was pretty laid back as well, they seemed very easy going and friendly which was great.
Me and my ex at the time had been touring the states for the summer. We started from the top, Michigan, and toured all the way to Louisiana and then back up again and decided to crash at my ex's friend place for that one night.
.........
A side note, I've been an avid weed smoker "back in the day" (highschool) and up to a few years after until I started University, which by then I stopped smoking weed altogether due to the negative side effects I began to experience every time I indulged.
Now , every time I smoke (which is very rare) I always experience this "negativity", an overwhelming sense of fear and paranoia, increased thought process practically to the point of "hyper-analysis" (If that's even a word) and just a general sense of feeling dazed and confused during and after. Every time I indulge I have to consciously (actively) force my self into thinking positive and just forcing my self to calm down and avoid an imminent panic attack, having to do this every time is just not worth it in my honest opinion and just leaves me feeling drained and depressed.
I don't experience any positivity with weed anymore like I used to when I first started. Maybe I just smoked myself out ?? lol. Maybe it's just past and current environmental and social factors (setting, mood (subconscious), company, ideas etc.) that have had an influence in my waking life. Anyways.
..........
So, there I was, sitting on the cement floor of this garage (the floor was pretty cold) in a circle with my ex , her best friend and that friends boyfriend.
Me and my ex were both tired from the drive up to Detroit and thought , "yea, some weed would be good right about now" (me not thinking that the last time I had smoked was years ago. It's "just weed" right ?...)
A decent sized bowl was packed in a glass pipe and we begin to pass it around. I remember feeling excited and eager to finally smoke some good bud with some good people in a positive setting. Even though I was nervous because naturally I am a bit of a shy person, and slightly "self conscious" I tried to look past these traits of mine and shrug them off as something minor and irrelevant at this point and stage in my life.
I remember taking two huge hits, and as soon as I exhaled on the second one I remember thinking to myself " ohhh shiittt here we goooo" . I had to sit down, but I was already sitting. There was this huge rushing feeling , the "come up" was practically instantaneous, something I had never experienced before with weed. Usually the come up is gradual (5+ minutes), but with this Sour Diesel stuff it was practically instant. Like within a minute.
It felt like this "haze" of a rush, (even almost like a "Salvia" type rush, but instead of being catapulted backwards into your mind and then into another reality like with Salvia, I just stayed there in my mind under this veiled smokey confused haze). It's like I was looking at everything through a an "electric fog". My body felt charged with electricity, tingling and filled with energy, not "constructive" energy but this dormant , stagnant electricity under my skin and nerves. I could feel a tingling in my spine and in the back of my head. Like as if my very molecules, atoms, particles, muscle fibers and hair were vibrating.
At first (what felt like the beginning few minutes... 3-10 min ?) I found all this, kind of "interesting" and maybe even "amusing" because it was new and unexpected. As soon as those first few minutes of mercy expired, I began to run into trouble. I remember looking at everyone through this electrically charged fog behind my eyeballs and within my own skull, as if everything and everyone was standing still, everything was silent, quiet or so I perceived. It felt like I was holding my breath (maybe I was) and that everyone else too was holding there breath (maybe they were), staring at me with concern and fascination. That moment, when I first looked up at everyone was weird and funny now that I think back on it.
From there, I remember everyone began talking (as if the moment of stillness and silence never happened, existed). I couldn't talk. I could only perceive. It quite literally felt like I had been strapped with a straight jacket (maybe I was) and had my mouth taped shut. I have no idea what everyone was talking about , even though they were sitting inches away from me. Then, at one point, my ex yells out to me and kind of physically shakes me, saying to me and everyone "What have you done to my boyfriend !!?" , in a joking manner. I remember just looking at her then back at everyone and just trying to produce this vague "smile" (as if I knew how to coordinate any sort of muscle movement at this point). Soon after that, I just began to stare at the floor I was sitting on. I remember staring so intensely at this cement floor that I began to see these little patterns and intricacies in the cement. The grains , bumps, holes, cracks all started to make these complex patters that I started tracing over with my finger.
Sitting there cross legged, tracing over microscopic complexities in a cement floor in front of a group of people can seem a little weird (if you know what I mean).
I must have been tracing over this pattern that I had found and stuck to for what felt like an eternity. Too scared too look up.
By now, this fear and anxiety had manifested itself within me. I kept repeating in this skull of mine, that there was no reason to look up, that I shouldn't look up, for fear of the "unknown" (what unknown??). I felt that if I did look up I would be "judged", that my fear and anxiety which I was experiencing would be exposed to the rest of the party, so as long as I kept looking down and tracing this pattern in the floor, no one would be the wiser...
Now, the anxiety, fear and new acquired paranoia had reached it's peak and did not seem to want to leave me any time soon. Another problem, I began to feel a pressure in my lower abdomen, like I had to go urinate. I started to focus on this feeling (while still looking down and tracing these invisible cement patters), the more I began to focus on my physical being (my body) , the more aware and the more concerned I became about it. I noticed my ass beginning to feel unusually cold. It felt so cold that it felt hot (you know when you run your hand under some water that's so hot it feels cold ?, well it was like that). I began to get extremely paranoid, nervous and self conscious at this point.... "Did I just shit my pants??!" , "Fuck, I really hope I didn't piss my pants right now!..." . I started to lean and fidget as discretely as I could, trying to get a better look of my "underside". There was no way I could tell.
Now while this was all happening (my act of trying to get a better look). To the outside viewer, it looked like I was twitching quite badly.
Maybe an hour and a half had passed at this point ? (there was no way I could tell, time had no meaning, I was just simply "stuck" there).
So within all this twitching, discrete detective work and maddening paranoia, someone says "J !!, What's your name ??, can you hear me J ?, look at me dude" . I remember thinking to myself, "did someone just call my name ?" , so I look up (as if in autopilot) , blankly starring the general direction of from were I assumed the voice came from . I was met with "tractor beam" like vision from my ex's best friend. She repeated again, "J , what's your name ?" . I found this funny because I thought they were "playing with me" , as if it was a trick question.... it was... The more I began to think about it , the more complex it became. I began to panic (though tried my best to not show it), I mustered out in this lost, pathetic low pitched voice "jaaayy". ("Yes, I answered correctly, now leave me the fuck alone" I thought to myself). I remember being asked more "trick" questions but just zoning them out and covering them all with a classic blanket statement, 'Maaannn, I'mmm waayyy too higgghhh rriighhtt noooww".
After another half hour or so ( I now assume ), someone says " Lets all go sit on the couches in the living room"
At that moment, I became overjoyed that we were going to get up and leave this cold environment and onto some comfy warm couches (maybe I could then just pass out and wake up back to normal). But, at the same time, I thought to myself "Fuck, I can't get up, what happens if I really did shit my pants ???!"
Somehow I remember sitting on the couch (don't know if I did this under my own power / will, or if someone helped me there).
At this point, I could feel like the "high" slowly started to diminish (still extremely slowly to be certain). I think everyone at this stage accepted that I was gone and in my own world and just started talking amongst themselves while I just layed there like this brain dead mass of paranoia and nothingness.
I finally get the courage to say something under my own free will , "Were is the bathroom ?" . Everyone is startled by my sudden "awareness" (awakening ?). They point it out to me.
Getting up from the couch was insane. It felt like my legs had been asleep for years and made out of jello. I slowly began snapping back and for between reality and still being high. (I felt schizo a couple of times). Stumbling over to the washroom, I hear a girls voice hysterically saying "Wow, he's really out of it !!" and laughing. At this point, I had enough and that didn't bother me, I was more concerned and fixated on sobering up and being done with this "high".
I must have spent another hour in the washroom. Splashing cold water on my face and starring in the mirror. Repeating this process like some sort of ritual.
Every so often, someone would come knock on the door and ask me if I was ok, all I could say was "yea" and just continued to stare at myself in the mirror. After realizing and assuring myself I never had taken a crap and pissed my pants, I felt like it was safe to go back to the couches and rejoin the company.
By the time I left the washroom and walked back to the couches I had almost sobered up.
"Welcome back J !, you Ok ?" (everyone's starring at me). "Yea, I'm ok, man that was FUCKED UP" .
I just layed there, watching some thing on the tv until everyone passed out (including me).
_________________
Ever since, I swore to myself I'd never touch weed again.
(Though I have had a toke here and there, trying to figure out and understand if I could get over my anxiety while under the influence of some really old and crappy bud that I had laying around (no idea on the type strain)). Never went too well, but then again it wasn't like the Sour Diesel nightmare.
So I think I might be done with weed. (Unless I had an opportunity and access to various types of strains to "test" and figure out what works and what doesn't, but unfortunately, no one here has any clue/idea on what a "strain" is, or if it's indica or sativa or even a hybrid... it's a shame.)
