started indulging in bricks just to end a night and get to sleep. the high isnt that amazing and when i eat them before bed it is not the high im chasing, its more to control my sleep. i find it very hard to get to sleep. the later it gets the better i feel, and my brain keeps churning
i usually use booze + Melatonin + Diphenhydramine + Doxylamine 5 - 10, tablets each 2mg melatonin and a few beers or vodke every night to sleep and im nocibally not as sharp or motivated the next day.
but when take 3mg xanax to sleep,drifting off is much easyer, i dont get high, i just wake up i feeling totally amazing... is this normal? Why does this happen?
even with only 6 hours sleep, a bit of grog on the way down before bed, i experience the following (obviously more sleep is better)
-easyer to get up
-feel great, like im glowing inside, im happier, jollyer and i have much much more confidence
-find it easier to converse and feel comfortable around colleagues, crack jokes etc
-i can express myself better and more clearly (i am an extravert already)
-i don't need coffee
-there are no bags under my eyes, before i started taking any drugs, this has always been a problem, my mother seems to think its related to a weak liver.
-im noticeably more motivated
i used to work out a lot and started feeling this way if i was to workout every day, except for the no bags under the eyes thing.
i have been addicted to xanex before. because i used it to enhance my reality in the ways i described above. i didnt find it that hard to stop but hard to find people with xanax. a half week of mixing all the OTC sleepers and booze fixed me up. i can deal with it.
i do shift work and could argue for a legitimate need to be on sleeping medication.
i really want to know why i feel so good the next day? and if it would be viable for me to talk to a doctor about other medication that would be better for me, always be available and cost a lot less.