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2 Months After MDMA, still feeling messed up...

If you have the ability to move, I would whole heartily recommend Yoga chikitsa.
It means yoga therapy. It's the name for the first series of ashtanga yoga asana postures.

If you have possibility to practice it with qualified teacher - go for it.<3

It can *not* be practiced at the same time as taking synthetic drugs or strong herbs.

The practice has very strong effect if done 4-6 times a week. It balances the nervous system and hormones, it strengthens the sense organs. It cleanses the body in specific way indeed.

.....
In my honest opinion, the drugs should be the last choice. They may help for some symptom, but may also hide the underlying imbalance that has taken place in your body.
The practice is completely other way to approach bodily and mental problems than drugs.
 
I've had post mdma anxiety and depression in the past. Therapy and SSRIs helped me the most. I hope you feel better soon!
 
SSRI's are the pussy way out, give it time like the man said. With the case of MDMA time is truly essential meaning at LEAST like 5 months. Im at the 8 month mark of no mdma and feeling alot better yet still having some anxiety and mild depression which i blame on my daily marijuana intake. I also dabble in some other pharmaceuticals but those are ALL under control. The drug that really changed me drastically and quickly was MDMA. Weed also changed me for the worse but that is over 4 years of smoking, 2-3 of those years being daily use of high grade medical weed. With time and absence of all drugs the negative effects will reverse. With time and still using drugs besides mdma it will still reverse, just a ton slower.
 
You have the wrong thought process right now.

"Life is an endless sea of choice"

^^^^-->(oceanlab-just listen (myon & Shane 54 remix))
Listen to this song while reading this post.

The beautiful thing about the mind, is that we control it. You always have the choice to do what you want, think what you want, and feel how you want.

Take some time off of whatever it is youre obligated to do, and do some things you really enjoy and/or are really good at.

Never underestimate the power of vacation time. It will regain your inner sense of self, and your overall levels of contentness and confidence, and make you realize how amazing of a being you really are, and how life is too short and unpredictable to dwell in the past.

Once you stop beating yourself up for your mistake, which everyone makes by the way, you can start choosing to stop living in the past, and live in the moment, enjoying life as it comes to you.

Good luck my friend
 
^brilliant advice. I followed you intrstructions before your post... this track is amazing! :)
 
thanks for your reply, honestly bro, i wish it was that easy to forget about it... if it was just me worrying about my health im sure i would have already forgotten by now... but its more then that my vision is actually like im constantly in a dream state... its messed up.... feel like im not perceiving life as i should... its hard to explain, unless your experiencing it.... if someone told me the symptoms of what i was experiencing and i haven't experienced it before, i would probably think there over exaggerating.... also its hard to forget something like that when you notice your body and mind is not right....8(

thanks for your imput there.... hopefully i can find someone who has been through whatever im going through.

Man I am following this thread very closely, as this is EXACTLY what I'm going through right now. Though I've only done MDMA a handful of times, the last time being over a year ago, I've been in a completely messed up state of mind almost everyday since the last time. I'd say I feel a little better now if anything, but I've tried SO many things to get better, it makes me so depressed like you have stated.

My problem from MDMA caused me to have to stop smoking weed due to intense panic attacks, so there very well could have been some different circumstances leading to my problem, but almost everything you've described is what I'm feeling right now too. So far, the only things that have yielded positive results are healthy diet mixed with daily exercise, though only to an extent.

Any advice to the OP is much appreciated by myself as well, because I'm curious what people have to say. I'd like to think that it's all in my head, and that I've created this problem myself, but there are just too many things going on that lead me to believe it had to be from MDMA. (Messed up vision, anxiety, trouble concentrating, etc.)

Sorry for this long rant, but I REALLY want to get better myself :\
Thanks
 
hey daftpunkfan... i also would wish it was all in my head and im just causing it... but im sure its not the case.... These are serious intense symptoms that i have been going through.... and it makes me even more worried that you have said you have been going through this for a year.... i couldnt amagine living the rest of my life like this.... :(

have you been to the doctor and diagnosed with anything?
 
thanks for your input rock'n'rave, it has nothing to do with my though process or curret life situation... im am really content with where im at... i work when i want to... i dont have many bills... i own my vehicle outright... have money in the bank..... have a beautiful girlfriend... lifes good (pre mdma).... something fucked up chemically in my brain is my guess... just hope i can find out how to fix it...
 
Listen to me go to see a doctor.Ask about- SSRIs! i personally was on (zoloft), when i first was prescribed it, i was sure it will not help me, after 1 month it was almost over, after second month i quited SSRI, felt fantastic.
 
hey eLW... thanks for replying.... so your saying SSRI's rebalanced you back to normality?.... what kind of symptoms were you experiencing? Do you think it can be fixed without SSRI's?
 
I was thinking im going to die, i was sitting only at home, i was like in fog, always thinking of that made my first panic attacks, anxiety. Then i started googling my symptoms - i was sure - i FUCKED my liver, then kidneys, then i thought my heart is fucked up.!!:) i was thinking - thats it!! im going to fucking die! :D I did BLOOd TESt, everything was fine, ECG test was fine. Then Psychiatrist prescribed me SERTRALIN(zoloft) - i started taking it- and after 4 weeks i was almost back to normal. Completely back to normal after 2 -3 months. i quitted them. I didnt not have any kind of withdraw symptoms. You can always try sertralin is pretty good IMO. Btw i was rolling after that 2 years later and feel fine.

Without SSRI, i dont know. Its not easy for you always thinking about that. If i was you i would try SSRis at least for 1 month.
 
hey daftpunkfan... i also would wish it was all in my head and im just causing it... but im sure its not the case.... These are serious intense symptoms that i have been going through.... and it makes me even more worried that you have said you have been going through this for a year.... i couldnt amagine living the rest of my life like this.... :(

have you been to the doctor and diagnosed with anything?

Yeah I didn't mean to scare you with the fact that it's lasted so long for me, because hopefully this won't be the case with you. When I was at the point that you were at, I figured that by 6-8 months I'd be feeling pretty normal, but it has yet to happen...

I've been to the doctor and have just been diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. So far I've just tried benzos to help with my anxiety (Xanax, Clonazepam, Ativan) and they only help so much. Like you said Clonazepam made me feel like a zombie, so I stopped taking that and stick with Xanax.

My doctor does recommend putting me on an SSRI, but I've been very hesitant much like you. However, from what people have been recommending on this thread so far, I think I may give on of them a try. Maybe someone can go into a little more detail with the whole SSRI approach for the few that said it helped them.

Is this just something that you take for a short while to help your brain get back to normal, then you can stop them once you feel good? I think the main reason I've been so hesitant is because I thought of it as something that you end up taking for an extremely long time, and that sounds terrible to me.

Thanks
 
Wasnt bad pills.... a few of my buddys did the exact same ones.... and more then i did... and there fine....

It could be bad pills; your just the one that cares for the feelings your feeling just suck it up and forget about it. lifes to short to worrie bout the little things
 
Yeah I didn't mean to scare you with the fact that it's lasted so long for me, because hopefully this won't be the case with you. When I was at the point that you were at, I figured that by 6-8 months I'd be feeling pretty normal, but it has yet to happen...

I've been to the doctor and have just been diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. So far I've just tried benzos to help with my anxiety (Xanax, Clonazepam, Ativan) and they only help so much. Like you said Clonazepam made me feel like a zombie, so I stopped taking that and stick with Xanax.

My doctor does recommend putting me on an SSRI, but I've been very hesitant much like you. However, from what people have been recommending on this thread so far, I think I may give on of them a try. Maybe someone can go into a little more detail with the whole SSRI approach for the few that said it helped them.

Is this just something that you take for a short while to help your brain get back to normal, then you can stop them once you feel good? I think the main reason I've been so hesitant is because I thought of it as something that you end up taking for an extremely long time, and that sounds terrible to me.

Thanks

Not sure if you're still going through any of this still, but I had an identical problem occur about five years ago. I came to find out that this is actually a real illness called "Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder" (HPPD). How long it lasts and how severe it is, seems to be purely case by case.

I think in my case anxiety triggered my HPPD. I initially started taking a low dose of SSRI's for a year and once I got my initial anxiety and underlying depression in order (again, not sure if this was due to HPPD or a seed that caused my HPPD. Like you, my friends took the same pills same amounts etc.) my HPPD went away to a point I almost could not notice it. Feelings of depersonalization and that feeling that you're watching a movie through your own eyes went away almost completely.

I then started exercising regularly and generally leading a healthier lifestyle. At this point, I really only notice anything during twilight hours when the light is a little off. But it's nothing that bugs me out or feels weird at all. So all in all, I'm actually better off than I was 5 years ago.

From what I've researched and found I feel that what you are going through (f you're still going through it) has an underlying cause in anxiety or depression, which will compound all your visuals and feelings of disconnection from reality.

Just keep this in mind. You're not going crazy. You will be okay. I'm five years deep and happier than I've ever been. I lead a normal life and even have my pilots license (which may seem ridiculous to you seeing what you're going through). Just find your own ways to reduce anxiety and lift underlying depression.

Sorry for the long post. Just wanted to write something that would've helped me when I initially started going through this.
 
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