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Alcoholism Thread v. A sober life is a good life <3

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Is it possible with new bandwiths(it's been since 2006?) show all damn real-life personal details and the mistakes as pictures, very large scala?

Hssst...It gets more common all the time, best good is passing away if no enemies, and in the modern life, there is no. Good! There is no safeway for piercing, tattooss etc but get the score normal way....
Did you There Up,see any vastebooze? Abandoned?
 
^^ I'm not sure what you mean Orangutang. Have you been drinking today? PM me if you want to <3
 
Once again I let my depression and addiction do the talking. I went to the local club to try and win some money so that I can pay off something that I hocked. I was up a hundred or so and then at the end I lost 400 something. I won this money on thursday in a fit of destruction after an earlier drinking session. I needed this stuff payed off so that I could then start seeing a psych again. Prior to gambling tonight and on thursday it had been a while but once again it is the drink that ruins me.

I only now famoth with age, i.e. being 25 now how much this nasty liquid has ruined a lot of my opportunities and more so myself and yet I still can't seem to quit as it aids my depression. I went cold turkey on it before for a few months, I was training hard etc and still the emptiness was there. It made me feel lonely etc.......

I need to solve this problem once and for all. I have also been out of work for the past 8 months however after tonight, it was a pinch on the ass to get into gear. I ended up going straight to my previous employment to see if there was a job going around however this is what my old drill used to be. Lose money gambling whlst drinking, then ask for extra shifts. It was a dead end loop and I need to be smarter now and not be self destructive although ths is easier said then done.

To anyone who is young 20 below, drinking is not a weak drug. It will fucken destroy you and your precious time that you have to do good :)
 
^^ sorry to hear you've been struggling lately noonoo. i really hope you can find your resolve again.

this will be day three for me with no alcohol, i hope to stretch it out for as long as i can. a few days ago i had an epiphany to start writing lists and checking them off as i finish the tasks to generate some sense of accomplishment and forward motion. so far it has worked. so often i get depressed and bogged down by life that i wind up doing nothing except drinking.

however, i have started smoking again which is disgusting, but ive quit before and i'll quit again!! :! ;)

yoga and exercise are helping. as is keeping busy with things ive let slip ie dentist appointments and the like. will hopefully hit the art gallery today with a friend.

hope everyone has a good day today!! :)
 
Haven't posted here in a while but I might as well.

After losing my job, my apartment, my girlfriend, and getting my ass kicked on my last bender, I showed up at my parents house. I told them the truth and they are sending me to a 6 week inpatient rehab center. I feel really bad as it will be costing them 20 grand, but they are willing to do it as it may save my life. I will be attending a place where Robin Williams, Halle Berry, and even Ms. Lohan have all been to.

I sweated through some nasty withdrawls and am currently on 20mg of valium so I won't drink. I'll be admitted next week. It's a good place where AA is not the focus, but mental health, physical health and spirituality are prevelant.

I wish everyone the best of luck and the next time I post here I'll be nearly two months clean and sober. :)

I'm very thankful my parents were understanding and willing to spend that much money to help me.

edit: my ex sent my a loving message saying she was happy, supportive and knows I can do this. She went to rehab for an eating disorder a few years ago, which she beat, so I'm sure she knows all about addiction.
 
Best of luck Myles. Getting help is never easy. You are indeed fortunate to have such caring parents. Sounds like you're ready for this.

Don't forget to update us.
<3
 
myles p said:
Haven't posted here in a while but I might as well.

After losing my job, my apartment, my girlfriend, and getting my ass kicked on my last bender, I showed up at my parents house. I told them the truth and they are sending me to a 6 week inpatient rehab center. I feel really bad as it will be costing them 20 grand, but they are willing to do it as it may save my life. I will be attending a place where Robin Williams, Halle Berry, and even Ms. Lohan have all been to.

I sweated through some nasty withdrawls and am currently on 20mg of valium so I won't drink. I'll be admitted next week. It's a good place where AA is not the focus, but mental health, physical health and spirituality are prevelant.

I wish everyone the best of luck and the next time I post here I'll be nearly two months clean and sober. :)

I'm very thankful my parents were understanding and willing to spend that much money to help me.

edit: my ex sent my a loving message saying she was happy, supportive and knows I can do this. She went to rehab for an eating disorder a few years ago, which she beat, so I'm sure she knows all about addiction.
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Best of luck. It sounds like you have a great set-up with a nice rehab. When I went to rehab for methadone, I did it on the major cheap, as in free. It was awful. The food was bad, the people were crooked, the place was filthy. I had to leave and detox on my own. Your body feels unhealthy enough at that time without having to eat dollar store quality food. Haha, and I like telling people that I had to leave rehab because the food sucked. I remember thinking that if I had spent a fraction of the money I did on using on getting clean then it would have made a world of difference. I made it though, best of luck to you.
 
I just flushed down a collection of 400 wine bottles and all I can think about it is having a drink.

Why does alcoholism have to work this way????????
 
Only had 3 lite beers last night, feel pretty good this morning.

I'm sure its not the new meds, but they are having an indirect effect. I was able to tell myself "Well you are now taking medication and for it to work you really have to put in the work yourself".

I'm going to have the house to myself next weekend, seems like the perfect time to really plan a "jump off". Last time I quit I totally built it up in my head and really only had 1 day of discomfort (with a taper)
 
Has any one tried topamax for alcohol treatment? I was prescribed some today but it doesn't sound very appealing to me. It sounds like it messes with your taste perception/aversion and with other brain chemicals. Some of the side effects I think were decreased memory and concentration and possible increased suicidal ideation.

Let me know your experiences if you have any?

Here is an article about a trial that was run on it


http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/full/298/14/1641
 
noonoo said:
I just flushed down a collection of 400 wine bottles and all I can think about it is having a drink.

Why does alcoholism have to work this way????????
Click to expand...

400 8o How long did that take?!?

Anyway, that's really making a personal statement there, so good on you. I know I always have a hard time flushing stuff. I have to plug my nose, lest I smell the alcohol and become triggered.

It works that way because it is a hard drug which is very addictive - both to your mind and to your body. You get that itch, that taste and things like hangovers, bad choices, breaking sober streaks, etc...just kind of vanish.

How you going now?
 
that's dangerous red, you are letting it control some of you still, i dont know how long you been with out, but i swear, it starts to stink. it sure did for me, and makes the thought that less appealing. bleh..

you need to re-associate it, you know?
 
^ Oh I know it's still controlling me in many ways. It's a long road to recovery. I am very, very jealous of the day when it will stink for me too. I do try and think about the bad (everything, you know) whenever I catch a whiff and that often works. Just not perfect yet, since it's so glamorized. There's still a little bit of "ooo let's party" left in me.

It's been about a month, take away one wedding reception two weekends ago where I had 2 drinks. I'm not counting days this time, because that just adds pressure.

You're closing in on 1.5 years now aren't you, pip?
 
yeah, a little over ;)

i dont know how to explain it, it was always my worst most self indulging, do or die vice, same with cocaine, oh lord, all bets are off . . but i can chop lines for people with a half ounce, but have zero desire.

there is no strength or will power, no struggle except for the sick memories, and animal i allow myself to become with booze and coke.

alcohol had taken so many musicians writers painters thinkers inventors mothers fathers children , all for some. profit, those mother fuckers aren't going to corrode my body, break my home, risk mine and others lives. not over my dead dollar! fuck them.
 
I could of flushed a thousand and it wouldn't of made a difference. I ended up drinking tonight and now I am pissed off for flushing :( I was tempted to give it to someone but then I thought I don't want to poison someone with it. FUCK, I think I may need to see someone, this isn't a joke any more.
 
Doing pretty good, I have been able to keep it to 2 to 3 light beers (around 4 abv) since I started my medication. Making a major difference for me. I do not care if its placebo or not, however its not surprising since I feel most of my drinking was self medicating. Probably the reason why I didn't really drink to get drunk all that often. I did end up getting really drunk last Saturday and didn't really like it at all.

Major problem is its totally fucking up my sleep, I'm waking up with anxiety at around 3 or 4 AM. However, I do that when I am drinking too so its worth getting over.
 
congrats to NooNoo, that's really amazing self-control

I personally haven't actually gotten drunk since last summer, but the summers are the worst time for me; the past three summers in a row I was seriously an alcoholic. At this point alcohol seems unappealing to me in terms of effects. It just makes me sleepy, though I think that's because I've only been having 1 drink or a couple beers at a time. I know just thinking that is a bad idea, but I can't help it. Sometimes I just want to go out and get a 40oz - I have hard liquor here, but I drink that so slowly. I want to chug beer and get drunk...

And then again, I really don't. I'm a writer, and contrary to popular belief, it's very difficult to write and edit and prepare submissions if you're drunk all the time - though I've done it in the past. In fact, doing that last summer actually was a disaster; I ruined relationships with several editors, and also sent out some shit work, and work about my family I should have never exposed...

The problem is right now I'm getting clean off opiates (morphine,poppys,oxy,etc). I'm tapering and should be done within a month. I'm terrified of sober life, and also terrified it'll get me back into alcohol. Especially with all the romanticizing of writers and alcohol, which in the past has been a lure for me, as silly as that sounds. Also, another issue is that my girlfriend is pretty strongly against drug use (except pot), but she's a fairly regular drinker. And in the past she's had serious issues with alcoholism. So basically my lover, who is also my only/best friend, would be supportive if I started drinking a lot...

I don't know how to put this out of my mind...
 
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Alcoholism sucks. I've been dry for a week now, but last night I messed up (again, for the millionth time it seems) and got really drunk, all for the sake of hanging out with some dumb girl. Struggling at quitting, thinking of trying meds
 
^ Think of the week that you gained though, your body would have thanked you for it. Theres a whole new week ahead of you...

What meds are you going to try? I have heard a few different ones mentioned in this thread but dont really have much of an idea about which is which.

A friend of mine recomended Oxazepam but obviously it has it's own set of addiction potential issues. I will have to take it easy and be careful with it.

I considering starting on the topamax but cant really find much information or personal reports on it as it seems like it is relatively new.
 
batmanplaybaseball said:
Best of luck. It sounds like you have a great set-up with a nice rehab. When I went to rehab for methadone, I did it on the major cheap, as in free. It was awful. The food was bad, the people were crooked, the place was filthy. I had to leave and detox on my own. Your body feels unhealthy enough at that time without having to eat dollar store quality food. Haha, and I like telling people that I had to leave rehab because the food sucked. I remember thinking that if I had spent a fraction of the money I did on using on getting clean then it would have made a world of difference. I made it though, best of luck to you.
Click to expand...

haha that is funny. i would have left as well.
 
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