• TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | Eligiu | deficiT

Letter to Your Disease/Addiction

dear opiates,
youre yummy, youre the love of my life, but youre breaking my heart.
fuck you.

<3 calvin
 
Dear alcohol,
You're a dick. What'd you do with all my passion and willpower? Now I've lost all my friends and desire to have friends, and desire to do anything with myself. I don't know if it's workin out between us. I need my space.

- Me

P.S. Tell your friends (coke, oxy, pills, etc.) that they took a big giant crap on my life over the past few years. I'm glad I can't afford them anymore.
 
Dear Addiction and that little voice that tells you you're not good enough;


Leave me the fuck alone you piece of shit.
 
Dear Benzodiazepines,

I know you're terribly addictive, and your withdrawals can be an absolute nightmare - but you're helping to take the edge off my meth cravings, so I guess I owe you a thank you!

Kind regards,
Sweet P
 
mmm great thread to reanimate kc


Dear opiates:
Thank you for getting me through college. I was miserable and hated it and without you I never would have gotten my degree or the job I have now.

Now I know I said you could stay on my couch for like, 6 months after graduating. But its been almost 4 years since I told you to go away and you are still there. Get the fuck out you goddamn mooch, I could have bought a Porsche with all the money I've lent you in the last 7 years. I deserve a Porsche. Asshole.
 
Dear Opiates,


Fuck Off. I was going to stop at fuck off but realized im actually really pissed at you. Your like that washed up cool guy in high school. Nobody needs you anymore. Your appeal isnt there like it used to be. When we met, you were so fine. You always made me happy, but now you just make me feel like shit and hurt the people around me.

FUCK YOU!

Hey kc I saw you had a letter there from our addiction! This song imo is my addiction lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ov7-Ujz1ecs Tom waits ftw :) lmao these lyrics are so funny.

There is a light in the forest
There is a face in the tree
I'll pull you out of the chorus
And the first one's always free


You can never go hunting
With just a flintlock and a hound
You won't go home with a bunting
If you blow a hundred rounds


It takes much more than wild courage
Or you'll hit just the tattered clouds
You must have just the right bullets
And the first one's always free


You must be careful in the forest
Broken glass and rusty nails
If you're to bring back something for us
I have bullets for sale


Why be a fool when you can chase away
Your blind and your gloom
I have blessed each one of these bullets
And they shine just like a spoon


To have sixty silver wishes
Is a small price to pay
They'll be your private little fishes
And they'll never swim away


I just want you to be happy
That's my only little wish
I'll fix your wagon and your musket
And the spoon will have his dish


And I shudder at the thought of your
Poor empty hunter's pouch
So I'll keep the wind from your barrel
And bless the roof of your house
 
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Dear Cocaine,

I remember when we met, the memory's still clear today
You flattered my ego and made me feel okay

That night you said you were leaving, for a month you'd be away
But I liked you so much I tracked you down the very next day

Friends and family warned me about letting you in
They knew we would fight and they knew you would win

Soon came the day that you became a part of my soul
When you were gone I didn't feel whole

Eventually the spark between us started to fade
I wanted you gone but you wanted to stay, and so the decision was made

To liven it up I invited a third party in
That's when we met our good friend heroin

She leveled me out when we started to crash
But together you two stole all of my cash

Then came the day you turned me against myself
You convinced me to steal from my future and health

Everybody saw it but somehow I remained blind
To the fact that you two had taken over my mind

So this is goodbye my friends, it's just not worth it anymore
I hate feeling empty and I hate being poor

My life's too important and my future's too bright
I don't know where sobriety will take me, but I know where you might

Don't get me wrong, you'll forever hold a special place in my heart
But you and I both know we're better off apart

So once again goodbye heroin and goodbye cocaine
Goodbye to misery and goodbye to pain
 
Dear Alcohol

If you weren't so historically romanticized in most all of my favorite literature and weren't such a socially embedded social staple I'd be rid of you.

Let us just be thankful I have you on a short leash at the moment.

Cheers
 
Not a letter but I remember seeing this on the wall in some rehab years ago and it kinda struck a chord with me.

Little Miss Heroin

So now, little man, you've grown tired of grass
LSD, goofballs, cocaine and hash,
and someone, pretending to be a true friend,
said, "I'll introduce you to Miss Heroin."

Well honey, before you start fooling with me,
just let me inform you of how it will be.

For I will seduce you and make you my slave,
I've sent men much stronger than you to their graves.
You think you could never become a disgrace,
and end up addicted to Poppy seed waste.

So you'll start inhaling me one afternoon,
you'll take me into your arms very soon.
And once I've entered deep down in your veins,
The craving will nearly drive you insane.

You'll swindle your mother and just for a buck.
You'll turn into something vile and corrupt.
You'll mug and you'll steal for my narcotic charm,
and feel contentment when I'm in your arms.

The day, when you realize the monster you've grown,
you'll solemnly swear to leave me alone.
If you think you've got that mystical knack,
then sweetie, just try getting me off your back.

The vomit, the cramps, your gut tied in knots.
The jangling nerves screaming for one more shot.
The hot chills and cold sweats, withdrawal pains,
can only be saved by my little white grains.

There's no other way, and there's no need to look,
for deep down inside you know you are hooked.
You'll desperately run to the pushers and then,
you'll welcome me back to your arms once again.

And you will return just as I foretold!
I know that you'll give me your body and soul.
You'll give up your morals, your conscience, your heart.
And you will be mine until, "Death Do Us Part"
 
Dear Crystal,

I started off just being a casual acquaintance to you. I was scared of you because of rumors I had heard about you but I decided to give you a chance. We had such a wonderful time together at first. You started coming around more and more and I gave in to the temptation.

Crystal, I feel like you have changed and our relationship has changed. We don't have fun together anymore. We stay together alone at home and afraid of the outside world. Our relationship has scared my friends and family away. One night you nearly killed me and I ended up in the hospital.

It is time for us to go our separate ways. It was fun while it lasted but I haven't seen you in a month. I still think about you every day and will remember the good times and the bad forever. I am starting to feel like myself again very slowly. I hear you calling out to me but I cannot give in to you anymore.
 
To my dear methamphetty,
You took my life down a path I don't know if it was ever meant to take. I was a smart kid, and in primary school I said I wanted to be a paediatrician, and I remember the conviction my teachers and parents had that I would be. I received the top marks in my state for my scholarship test, and proceeded to an exclusive girls' high school. But smart was never cool; I was a shy and awkward introvert and the rejection of my classmates was soul destroying. And this is where you came in, methamphetamine. Before I met you, I had already started to reject a life on the straight and narrow; doing well at school had seemingly brought me nothing but misery. I loved anything that defined me as rebellious and as 'not giving a fuck' - as if these activities could perhaps hide the fact how much I truly did care. And so I began drinking and going to nightclubs, and it was here, at 16, that I first met you. I loved the identity you gave me almost as much as I loved your blinding white high. Suddenly my identity was no longer 'loser', but 'druggie', and I loved it. I loved that for the first time, I felt 'better' at something than my classmates. I was cooler than them, and it was intoxicating in every sense of the word.

Over the years, your use lost some of its allure. My friends met you; I was no longer the trailblazer. Instead, I was the one who couldn't control you. You grabbed me stronger than the others; but I just couldn't drag myself away from the indentity you gave me - the only comfortable indentity I have ever known. You became not just an ally but a part of my soul. I don't know where you end and where I begin. I know you are no good for me - but whenever I meet you, you are so beautiful that I don't care. I will keep trying to leave you though, because I want to be good enough on my own, and if nothing else, I still have hope that I can be just as good, in fact better, without you.
 
dear opiates,

i hate you. originally we had passion, warmth, psuedo-love maybe... but now, there is not even that. i have a compulsion to see you, but afterwords i always feel empty, dumb and depressed. you have taken more than three years of my life, all a waste, a blur... and a dehumanizing existence is all that is left.
i knew this is what would happen. i was not blind to your nature, or my own. it was like destiny, not that i really believe in destiny. in a lot of ways you saved me, let me be blind to many things that i could not handle circa 2005-2007. but we only really got into it near the end of that, i put too much into you, and you became a distraction instead of a destination.
now i barely see you, but you still run my life. all day i am either doing my best to run away from my thoughts, or giving in to them. this is no way to live.
all beginnings start with an ending. but when will this end, how will this end? i can't imagine... i'm tired of the morphing, of the hiding, of the rationalizing lying and deceiving. and yes, stealing. don't think i've forgotten about what you had me do to my family so that we could be together. but i am not a thief, or a deceitful person. i will never steal again. i am just weak, but i am not willing to do that anymore. i would rather be nothing than a thief or a burden. you have taken me further down the rabbit hole than i ever wished to go. i am a burden to my family, friends (the few left), and even the country. this is not what i pictured my life would be like at this age. part of my personality, my soul, is gone because of you. i will fight to get it back again.

please leave me be. i have a life to live.
 
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downward spiral - thanks, I actually came back in here to delete my post because I thought it sounded stupid, so thanks for that :)
 
Wtf footscrazy that was beautiful. Your nuts for wanting to delete that!!
 
^ Agreed. And I can relate to so much of that. Thank you <3
 
I have never been to rehab, and don't know anyone who has, so have never heard of such a letter. I have been struggling with my addiction to adderall, and reading all of your posts really made me look at myself and my situation. I am in the process of writing my letter, but I truly wanted to thank you all for sharing and for giving me a way to finally let go.
 
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