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Ahhh....Benzo Withdrawal....Could there be anything worse in life?

Anon Ymous

Ex-Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 13, 2008
Messages
109
I'm an 18 year old male who lives in Australia. I was first prescribed a benzodiazepine when I was in my 15's, towards the end of being a 15 year old boy. I had mild, bery bery mild anxiety at the time and sought out treatment, first psychotherapy, then anti-depressants, then a doctor who prescribed a whole galaxy of benzodiazepines. Xanax 1 and 2 mg, Ativan 1mg, Diazepam 5mg, Bromazepam 6mg, Nitrazepam 5mg and finally Clonazepam 2mg. Noone knew about my little habit, not even myself, I had no fucking idea about how addicting benzodiazepines could be until I was in my late 17's. After sampling and getting a shitload of benzodiazepines and Dexamphetamine tablets, I decided to look up the drugs I was taking on the web and found that clonazepam was a long acting potent benzo and BAM I was on that shit straight away, 100 x 2mg clonazepam with 2 repeats the doctor wrote out. Soon after that, the doctor retired. For the next 2 years, I was addicted to clonazepam. 2mg a day was my absolute limit, and my maximum dose was, I prefer not to dicksize. I was a naive, non-drug seeking adolescent. After I finished Grade 12, I decided to go cold turkey during the Summer. Waited 3-4 days and FUCK ME, I was in so much psychological and physiological pain, out of this world pain, no sleep for 6 days, not knowing what the fuck was going on, ohh shit the words cannot describe the pain I was in. You have to go through benzodiazepine withdrawal to understand it. Anyways, for the next 6 months I was home-bound. Never went out, didn't know what the fuck I wanted to do in life, stopped socializing and was a crazy Ritalin and Dexy fiend going through bouts of ineffective anti-depressant treatments til' one day my GP who trusted me, prescribed me the oh so dreaded Xanax 2mg 50 tablets. I was no stranger to Xanax. I had previously gone through about 10+ bottles during my initial benzo addiction hay days (when I was 15 years old). Anyway, I hadn't had any benzos or liquor in 6 months and instant anxiety relief came with 1mg Xanax. I was able to go to the shops and hand out job resumes. I landed myself a job, and also the confidence to see other doctors about anxiety and scored myself 100 x 5 mg Valium tablets. Within a 2 month period, the Xanax was gone and the Valium was running low. I never knew that I could withdraw from the way that I was using the Xanax (every second day) and again, I suffered the motherfucking wrath of benzodiazepine withdrawal, this time while holding down a job at a supermarket and enrolling in a University course...The Xanax withdrawal was alot less longer than clonazepam withdrawal, but more intense I guess. Anyways, around September I was on Paroxetine 40 mg a day for a god 3-4 months, and I went cold turkey off them and was extra homicidal and angry and out of my mind so I called up my psychiatrist and got a script for 2mg Rivotril x 100 tablets. The addiction crept up on me and I found myself dependent within a couple of weeks. 200 tablets later, it was revealed to my parents that I was addicted to clonazepam. They were angry at the medical professionals for this mess and after searching around for a doctor who knew a thing or two about benzo withdrawal, I was put on 6 x 5mg Valium tablets a day instead of 6mg Rivotril a day. I'm going through my 3rd benzo withdrawal this year, I'm in pain and my anxiety has flared up to the point where I believe I got an anxiety disorder. Life's a bitch. I'll be spending NYE home with my parents. I'm missing out on life. But I'm not depressed, people have got it way worse than me.

Point of this post, you can make it through whatever you're doing. I'm 18 years old and have been in a severe car accident and have suffered from a crippling benzo addiction since I was 15 years old. Also another point I'd like to raise now is that people out there who have a fresh script for benzos, please don't take em every single day. Take them recreationally, enjoy life, don't let the benzos ruin your life and turn you into something horrible. I cannot stress it enough.

Drugs are great, just don't let them fuck you over Bluelighters.
 
a fair few of us ODers have gone through benzo withdrawal and i can testify that its one of the worst things ive been through.

you're not asking any question here though man, this would be suited for your journal/blog.

this will probably be closed if you don't edit it so that you're asking something.
 
Oh, Okay then. What medicines can help me though benzodiazepine withdrawal? I got access to Codeine 10mg and 500mg Paracetomal and 5.1mg Doxylamine succinate tablets but the quantity I can get is restricted. What helps with benzodiazepine withdrawal?

leftwing, it's 12:27 in Australia dude. I take it you ain't going out tonight brother?
 
^ Neither am I. No daylight savings for you, you must be in QLD as well?

Are you going through benzo WD again right now?
 
nuh buddy, aint going out tonight. im just chillin at home on some bupe and tramadol half watching the tsunami program on channel 7.

as for your question, theres a fair amount of info about benzo withdrawal on here so you should try a search. i'll have a look myself and link you to something.

the safest way to go get clean from benzos is with a taper. we'd need a little more info of how much you're using of what drug at the moment and how long you've been doing that for.

the codeine/doxy/paracetamol will help to some extent. the codeine will help with the physical pain esp from RLS and the doxy should help sedate you and help you sleep. another suggestion is talk to your dr about what you're experiencing and that you want to get off.
 
Yes Mr. B, I'm yet again going through a Valium withdrawal. I found a bad place in the wrong side of town that has alot of smack and benzo junkies living amongst the mix (West End). I am on a Valium taper right now. I stole some of mah brothers liqour and I know diazepam and ethanol are cross tolerant but meh. i cant wait till im off the Valium. Life will be so much sweeter.

I'm thinkinh of presenting myself as an opiate addict so i can get some opiods/opiates to help with the withdrawal. god knows australia is fucked when it comes to helping people dependent on benzos/. thanks lw for the link. my gut is feeling so fuckin sick right now, mucuous filled absinthe lol.................[peace poit out!
 
^ So no medical supervision for your taper this time?

Maybe you should take the taper a little slower, could ease it a bit.
 
Dubs post. Nah I'm on a medically supervised taper with a doctor who knew shit about BZ withdrawal until I showed up in his office, he read about it a bit more at home and has me on a tapering schedule. I'm on 5 a day now (5 x 5 Valium). God, never again will I be tempted to use Valium or any other benzos. All my other tapers were medically unsupervised and my family didnt know shit about me or what i was going thru.

fuickit, life's better than starving african kids...
 
chief over lord, don't get on benzos no matter what the doc orders. Fuck his advice. Evidence is abundant enough here on BL that benzo withdrawal is 10x harsher than any opiate withdrawal. Think positive....I guess.
 
Sure thing/ eatomg sp,etjomg
sure thing. eating something and going to beddy bies now. peace to alllllll.
 
At least benzo withdrawal can be modulated with booze. Or am I completely wrong.

I've been through mild Midazolam withdrawal and I can't compare it to Fent withdrawal, perhaps it's the qty as well though.

Benzo withdrawal is more dangerous, but does it feel as bad as opiate withdrawal? Say you're addicted to therapeutic quantities.

Good luck Anon. Seems like you found some something to help yourself out (by the sounds of that last post, hehe) :)
 
^ Alcohol can't be used to help benzo WD; well to some extent it can, but it won't prevent seizures due to it acting on different parts of the GABA system I believe.

From the users I've talked to, benzo WD is a lot worse then opioid WD in terms of suffering.
 
That sucks! Maybe I should stop using Clonazepam before I get myself into crap.

I really thought that opiate withdrawal was the penultimate. I'll be more careful with my benzo use from now on though.
 
^ Mos def; be careful you don't get yourself into a tight spot with it, like you know the WD can be nasty and getting off will be a challenge. Do-able, but not easy.
 
I think I'll stick to my puny 1.5mg Rxed of Rivotril and taper with Clobazam (Urbanol - a weird but semi effective benzo). It sounds like the better choice. I quit 1.5mg cold turkey after 3 months without any bad effects but as I realized with opiates, sometimes 3 months isn't even enough to produce w/d.

It was a different story with midazolam. OMG that stuff is the devil, one week and after you run out (admittedly from disgustingly excessive use) and you'll think there's demons under your bed. At least for one night! :)
 
Mild social anxiety. I'm used to being a large, fit guy that can handle my own in clubs and pubs and now I have a slight limp and no power in my right hand (after an accident). After all the ops are done (and I'm back to normal), the doc wants to drop the benzos and I agree with him.

To be honest, I don't really, really need them but they do help with my social life at the moment. A few upsets as well, hehe, from overconsumption. But for the most post they've been a great help.

The midazolam was for severe pain and sleeping problems but I haven't taken that in months.
 
^ Yeah I know what you mean about not really needing something but indulging anyway... hopefully after the health problems are fixed up you will be back to your normal self. :)
 
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