BeenArrested4Pot
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2008
- Messages
- 472
Disclaimer: I would like to mention upfront that this strategy only works for a NIDA-5 dipstick drug test. My advice is if you know you are going to be subjected to a series of drug tests, for example, once a month, you clean up legitimately and figure out what kind of test they are using. It is imperative you are positive the test isn't going to the lab. If the sample is going to a lab you can stop reading now. This is because samples tested with the NIDA-5 dipstick are 'beatable', while samples that are sent to a lab for testing are not beatable; at least not by dilution.
Most probation offices have a lab technician who handles and tests all the samples. Probation offices are all about the money and typically use the NIDA-5 because it is the cheapest and quickest. It is also more logical for a corrections institution to use a test that will instantly indicate who needs to go to jail. The probation office will charge you for this test- if it costs around ten dollars it is probably a NIDA-5.
Conversely, when you take a drug test for potential employment, it is usually sent to the lab. At the lab, the urine sample will be tested for specific gravity which tests the levels of creatinine in the sample. This is how the lab determines if the sample is diluted. Watered down samples will show up diluted. The drug tests that test for specific gravity are more expensive, thus rarely appearing in a probation office.
I just passed my twelfth drug test in a row recently. I spent the night staying up performing my monthly rituals- drinking water, popping vitamins, and essentially turning myself into a virtual water pump.
I would like to create a small thread called "Passing the NIDA-5 Drug Test For Dummies". Keep in mind, I'm only concerned with THC and occasionally opiates. This is the case with the majority, because the other drugs in the NIDA-5 are water soluble or don't take long to exit the body, meaning it is much easier to quit for 72 hours and defeat the test with minimal dilution of one's urine. But again this focuses mainly on the dreaded fat-soluble THC.
Firstly, a NIDA-5 drug test is an extremely common drug test often administered by most probation/ parole offices. It only tests for 5 classes of drugs- Amphetamines, Cocaine, THC, Opiates, and >>PCP <<(lmao).
Cannabis is the scariest for me because I love marijuana and it takes a long time to exit the body because it is fat soluble; in other words you can't simply flush THC metabolites out of your body the way you could with the metabolites of [edited for BobLoblaw-] some water soluble drugs, such as amphetamine. You can only dilute your urine to the point where there is enough water to lower the ratio of THC metabolites below the cutoff level used to determine whether the sample is positive or negative. The more water the sample contains, the better off you are. Thats all the conceptual bullshit, now here is what you have to do to pass the tests.
Try to quit for a week before the test. Each day without THC is insurance that you will pass- the less days you give yourself, your less chance of passing. And seriously, quit two or three days ahead of time at the absolute least or stop reading now.
Six to four hours prior to the test begin lightly drinking water and take B-12 vitamins or multivitamins of any sort. If the B-12 Vitamins are time release take three to four initially. If the B-12's are instant release, take them periodically (6 or more) as you consume water; same with multivitamins. These will help color your urine, so as not to arouse suspicion amongst the bladder police should you provide a crystal clear urine sample.
When it comes to drinking water, you really need to pound it, which can be nauseating and uncomfortable. But if you continuously drink bottled water once every 20-30 minutes and urinate frequently, it really is not so uncomfortable. You are trying to turn yourself into a water pump that distributes artificially colored urine- sure a few THC metabolites will escape but, nowhere near enough to exceed the cut-off level. You are mostly just pumping water through your body and small amounts of what would normally be in one's urine.
To become a human water pump you must start drinking water heavily at the latest 4 hours before the test. Just start drinking bottled water. Any diuretic will work in theory, but sugars and caffeine tend to fill you up faster making you become more uncomfortable as you drink copious amounts of fluid. Remember not to overdo it. I have thrown up water many times, before I realized I could pass a test without having to drink so much. Just be aware of water intoxication and don't kill yourself over a fucking drug test.
Keep drinking until you arrive and finish your last bottle right as you get there. When it comes to the test itself there are some fundamentals you should be aware of. First, never, ever make that piss test your first piss of the day- those THC metabolites build up throughout the night. You need to enter that building having at least pissed 5 or hopefully 8-10 times. Remember: human water pump.
So you have prepared well. You have spent 4 hours chugging a large amount of water. You have eaten many B-12 & multi-vitamins in order to color your urine. You have pissed at least five times before the test and still have to piss. Now go in there and seal the deal- -> Don't piss directly into the cup- begin by pissing in the urinal, then transfer the piss into the cup then finish in the urinal. This also has to do with the buildup and excretion of unwanted THC metabolites in the urine.
Don't trust 'novelty drinks /pills' that claim to clean your system of fat soluble molecules- your only options are dilution and substitution. Some novelty drinks will pass you simply because you drank so much water with the pills or solution you managed to successfully, (expensively), dilute your sample enough to pass. Basically the "Flush Your System Instantly" gimmicks simply provide the vitamins or fluids, (usually fluids) needed to pass the test in a flashy high-priced gimmick drink. Thats why some of the drinks come in massive jugs and the pills order you to drink tons of water. Goldenseal is worthless. Its a waste of money and the vitamins/ water method is far more physically comfortable and far less expensive.
Good Luck! Remember, always have a loaded bowl /rolled blunt for when you return! I hope this helps some people, because this is a habitually proven system that works for many people with a range of metabolisms. this information also helped me pass twelve drug tests and I can kiss that chapter of my life good bye. I wrote this Guide For Dummies because it would have helped me tremendously had I read it before my first test where I probably narrowly avoided water intoxication.
Most probation offices have a lab technician who handles and tests all the samples. Probation offices are all about the money and typically use the NIDA-5 because it is the cheapest and quickest. It is also more logical for a corrections institution to use a test that will instantly indicate who needs to go to jail. The probation office will charge you for this test- if it costs around ten dollars it is probably a NIDA-5.
Conversely, when you take a drug test for potential employment, it is usually sent to the lab. At the lab, the urine sample will be tested for specific gravity which tests the levels of creatinine in the sample. This is how the lab determines if the sample is diluted. Watered down samples will show up diluted. The drug tests that test for specific gravity are more expensive, thus rarely appearing in a probation office.
I just passed my twelfth drug test in a row recently. I spent the night staying up performing my monthly rituals- drinking water, popping vitamins, and essentially turning myself into a virtual water pump.
I would like to create a small thread called "Passing the NIDA-5 Drug Test For Dummies". Keep in mind, I'm only concerned with THC and occasionally opiates. This is the case with the majority, because the other drugs in the NIDA-5 are water soluble or don't take long to exit the body, meaning it is much easier to quit for 72 hours and defeat the test with minimal dilution of one's urine. But again this focuses mainly on the dreaded fat-soluble THC.
Firstly, a NIDA-5 drug test is an extremely common drug test often administered by most probation/ parole offices. It only tests for 5 classes of drugs- Amphetamines, Cocaine, THC, Opiates, and >>PCP <<(lmao).
Cannabis is the scariest for me because I love marijuana and it takes a long time to exit the body because it is fat soluble; in other words you can't simply flush THC metabolites out of your body the way you could with the metabolites of [edited for BobLoblaw-] some water soluble drugs, such as amphetamine. You can only dilute your urine to the point where there is enough water to lower the ratio of THC metabolites below the cutoff level used to determine whether the sample is positive or negative. The more water the sample contains, the better off you are. Thats all the conceptual bullshit, now here is what you have to do to pass the tests.
Try to quit for a week before the test. Each day without THC is insurance that you will pass- the less days you give yourself, your less chance of passing. And seriously, quit two or three days ahead of time at the absolute least or stop reading now.
Six to four hours prior to the test begin lightly drinking water and take B-12 vitamins or multivitamins of any sort. If the B-12 Vitamins are time release take three to four initially. If the B-12's are instant release, take them periodically (6 or more) as you consume water; same with multivitamins. These will help color your urine, so as not to arouse suspicion amongst the bladder police should you provide a crystal clear urine sample.
When it comes to drinking water, you really need to pound it, which can be nauseating and uncomfortable. But if you continuously drink bottled water once every 20-30 minutes and urinate frequently, it really is not so uncomfortable. You are trying to turn yourself into a water pump that distributes artificially colored urine- sure a few THC metabolites will escape but, nowhere near enough to exceed the cut-off level. You are mostly just pumping water through your body and small amounts of what would normally be in one's urine.
To become a human water pump you must start drinking water heavily at the latest 4 hours before the test. Just start drinking bottled water. Any diuretic will work in theory, but sugars and caffeine tend to fill you up faster making you become more uncomfortable as you drink copious amounts of fluid. Remember not to overdo it. I have thrown up water many times, before I realized I could pass a test without having to drink so much. Just be aware of water intoxication and don't kill yourself over a fucking drug test.
Keep drinking until you arrive and finish your last bottle right as you get there. When it comes to the test itself there are some fundamentals you should be aware of. First, never, ever make that piss test your first piss of the day- those THC metabolites build up throughout the night. You need to enter that building having at least pissed 5 or hopefully 8-10 times. Remember: human water pump.
So you have prepared well. You have spent 4 hours chugging a large amount of water. You have eaten many B-12 & multi-vitamins in order to color your urine. You have pissed at least five times before the test and still have to piss. Now go in there and seal the deal- -> Don't piss directly into the cup- begin by pissing in the urinal, then transfer the piss into the cup then finish in the urinal. This also has to do with the buildup and excretion of unwanted THC metabolites in the urine.
Don't trust 'novelty drinks /pills' that claim to clean your system of fat soluble molecules- your only options are dilution and substitution. Some novelty drinks will pass you simply because you drank so much water with the pills or solution you managed to successfully, (expensively), dilute your sample enough to pass. Basically the "Flush Your System Instantly" gimmicks simply provide the vitamins or fluids, (usually fluids) needed to pass the test in a flashy high-priced gimmick drink. Thats why some of the drinks come in massive jugs and the pills order you to drink tons of water. Goldenseal is worthless. Its a waste of money and the vitamins/ water method is far more physically comfortable and far less expensive.
Good Luck! Remember, always have a loaded bowl /rolled blunt for when you return! I hope this helps some people, because this is a habitually proven system that works for many people with a range of metabolisms. this information also helped me pass twelve drug tests and I can kiss that chapter of my life good bye. I wrote this Guide For Dummies because it would have helped me tremendously had I read it before my first test where I probably narrowly avoided water intoxication.
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![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
