^^ straight up man. that shit is not a joke.
I OD'd 3 days ago....Me and my girl got the dope, we shot it, and shit went down.
After I shot, I felt it creepin' up. I remember thinkin' "I wonder if I'm gonna overdose?" Last thing I remember is lighting a smoke. I wake up on the floor dizzy as hell with a hole in my shirt and a nasty ass burn on my chest from the cigarette. The emt's standing over me, tryin to get me to respond. The weird thing is I never got narcan or anything just CPR from whatever gadget that cops use to resuscitate people.
Before I went down, my girl went to her car for like 3 minutes then comes back and finds me layin' on the bed. She starts freakin - I must have been blue as shit because the first guy that got here was a cop - never met him but much love man, he even saw the dirty needles sittin out and didn't give a shit - and he told my brother that I was dead, couldn't find a pulse or breathing. Luckily, I'm not. unlike the last time I od'd, i didn't get narcan so i was still high as shit at the hospital - weird feeling.
Edit: now that I reread DamagedLemon's post, it sounds like a cry for help. Fantasizing about death is something people do when they're depressed, from my experience. If you're feeling depressed or suicidal you should tell someone you love and know very well, try to talk it out and get some help. The world is a beautiful place; death is an emptiness.