I've got a drug test coming up Monday, and I've used pot and e this past week. I found a dude who's willing to give me some clean pee that I can substitute.
Would it be possible to hide the pee in a smooth little plastic bottle up my ass? I'd attach a string to it just like a tampon, so I could get it out easily, and lube it up well. If I kept it in there for 15 minutes or so, that would solve the problem of keeping the pee at the right temperature, probably much more effectively than keeping it against my crotch.
Many people transport clandestine substances this way across borders, so I don't see why it wouldn't work. If anyone can give me a reason not to try something like this, I'll surely reconsider.