Using a negative situation in a positive way

Hey all. Brand new to blue light, but I figured now it better than ever. I have 2 points with this thread. One: at midnight, last night, I took my last dose of opiates (if anyone knows what bmore scramble is, that is my DOC) and am detoxing at home with my super supportive boyfriend. It's gonna suck, however, my habit has really only been in a physical dependency for maybe 2 or 3 months. I used recreationally (once a week, maybe) for a few months prior, so the wd symptoms shouldn't be as obscene as some other detoxes ive witnessed. In 2012 I was using pretty much every drug that existed, mostly LSD, mdma, and ketamine, until I fell into , smoking tar. Thankfully, I caught myself and stopped before I had to go through any serious symptoms. This time, not so lucky. It's gonna suck. However, I came up with an idea yesterday that seems like it would really aid in easing the process and maybe alow the process to actually produce something tangible. I'm an artist both by birth and profession. A muralist, to be exact. So I am going to cover a couple walls in my house and, during the worst days of the process, my main way of coping, staying busy, moving, expressing how I'm feeling, getting my anger out, etc. Will be through painting. I want to use this as a detox journal, but also share the mural progress. I'll be sitting on BL for the duration, the threads have helped a lot already over the past couple weeks...which have been dark to say the least.

Congrats on your decision to quit, and welcome to BL, LW!

Sounds like you've got a good mindset for this process. FWIW, my only advice is to keep an eye on your energy and mood when it comes to painting during acute withdrawal. It's definitely a good idea to stay occupied. But if painting starts to feel too exhausting or frustrating, don't feel discouraged...your energy and focus will come back to baseline soon enough. But only you know yourself well enough to say what will be feasible during detox.

I've never done it, but from what I know, scramble sounds like good stuff to get away from.

Looking forward to your journal.

P.s. scramble is nasty stuff. Not only does it contain heroin, 3 big cuts in it are usually quinine, fent, and morph...among other things. It's a literal opiate grab bag. So, not sure where imma end up.

Thanks! Still donot feel completely horrible, but the day is young. I really think this is a good way to go for me as restructuring detox as a sort of artistic experiment will really help me compartmentalize this process in a better way for my own head.

Sounds like a very creative and positive strategy! I love it. Lately I have been wanting to paint monkeys and rainforest on my kitchen cupboards (no joke) so maybe your progress will inspire me.

LysergicWarrior said:

Thanks! Still donot feel completely horrible, but the day is young. I really think this is a good way to go for me as restructuring detox as a sort of artistic experiment will really help me compartmentalize this process in a better way for my own head.

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This is a good attitude. Personally, I usually managed to think of detox (my DOC was heroin) as a semi-spiritual cleansing experience. Kind of goofy, but it made the discomfort seem a little more tolerable.

There used to be a time when I handled w/d (from opiates) much better than I do now. It seems after being clean for 1.5 years (and presently I've been going back and forth, using for 7 days, clean for 10 days or more or less)- I just can't tolerate the feeling of being in w/d. Mentally or physically.

But, even when I handled it well-I was able to completely keep my head out of it-I couldn't have painted a mural. The physical weakness, vomiting, hallucinating wouldn't allow it. But, I had been on prescription meds for alot longer than OP's habit and situation.

Even my first w/d which I thought was the flu, I still couldn't have painted a mural. My head wasn't in that either. I didn't know taking more opiates would end the way I was feeling. I look at staying calm and keeping a good attitude through all of it as an accomplishment.

OP-it would be really cool if you could paint during but even if ypu captured it when it was fresh in your memory-in another 10 or so days, that would also be amazing. I'm hoping you're feeling good enough. Keep us posted on your progress Hang in there. I'm in the beginning of day 19.

I like the title of using the negative as a positive, seems like that is one of the best coping mechanisms.
sending positive thoughts your way as you mural & detox. Be safe