OxySniffSniff
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2011
- Messages
- 8
Hello, everyone! My Name is Joe. I'm an underweight, unhealthy 22yr old man from PA. I've suffered from Opiate addiction since I was 16yrs old. By the time I was 17, I was taking 325mg of oxycodone at once every single day. I switched from painkillers to Heroin when I was 18.
After I graduated from high school, my parents sent me to a 12-Step rehab in Arizona for 2 months. I relapsed 2 hours after I came back home. At that point I felt so depressed, and I felt worthless that I started to hate myself. I felt like I was trapped and alone. I loved my parents so much that I felt like the only way to stop myself from ruining their lives, was to take my own. I was eventually given Suboxone to help taper myself off of Opiates. I ended up relapsing while I was taking the Suboxone.
On August 25th, 2015, I accidentally overdosed and killed myself in my bathroom from Heroin laced with Fentanyl. My dad found me on the bathroom floor. My lips were blue and my skin was starting to harden. My dad immediately dragged my dead body into the hallway and started giving me CPR. I didn't even have a pulse. I was dead for 8 minutes straight. When the ambulance arrived at my house, they started to feel a light pulse. They gave me a shot of Narcan, but I didn't respond to it. So they gave me a 2nd shot of Narcan. And 20 seconds later, I finally woke up. To this day, I still feel ashamed for making my dad see my dead body on the floor, and for making him do CPR on me for 8 minutes, not knowing whether it was already too late.
I've been clean ever since that night. My new passion is helping other people understand that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. Whether they're suffering from a drug addiction, alcoholism, food addiction, or even if they have depression that has nothing to do with addiction.
I'm more than 25 lbs underweight and during middle school and high school, I'd have people make jokes about it almost every day. I used drugs to mask how I really felt on the inside. I developed a fear of judgement from others. Even if someone was genuinely complimenting me, my brain would perceive it as sarcasm. I would wear hoodies during summer because I was afraid to show my skinny body.
Now that I've been sober, I finally realize that I was believing things that weren't true. There really is a way to beat your depression/addiction. If there's one thing I learned over the years, it's that people with addiction and depression want to help each other. They need help from people who have experienced addiction and depression. They need to talk to people who were able to go through hell and come out on the other side.
So I decided to create a Facebook page called "Still Standing." I wanted to create an easy way for people to connect to others who are fighting the same demons. A place where people suffering from addiction and/or depression can help each other. It can also be a place where non-addicts can get a clearer understanding of what true depression/addiction is. I've always wanted to be a part of something important. This gives people the opportunity to save someone else's life, including my own. I truly believe that I was given a 2nd chance at life in order to save the life of another.
It's a non-profit organization/brand. Bluelight.org is a great website and helped me through my addiction. The Bluelight community is full of great people, but most addicts don't even know it exists (Unfortunately). So my question to you guys is: Would you guys/gals like to join me on this journey to raise awareness and give support to the people who need it the most?
This is my passion project because on average, 120 Americans die from an overdose EVERY SINGLE DAY. Between Bluelight's focus on harm reduction and Still Standing's focus on the men
tal aspect of depression and addiction, I know that we can lower that statistic and let others know that addiction isn't a death sentence unless you let it become one. I hope to see you join the Still Standing Community!
www.facebook.com/StillStandingCommunity
https://m.facebook.com/StillStandingCommunity
**Please share this post/page because you never know who is silently screaming for help on the inside.**
-Joe
After I graduated from high school, my parents sent me to a 12-Step rehab in Arizona for 2 months. I relapsed 2 hours after I came back home. At that point I felt so depressed, and I felt worthless that I started to hate myself. I felt like I was trapped and alone. I loved my parents so much that I felt like the only way to stop myself from ruining their lives, was to take my own. I was eventually given Suboxone to help taper myself off of Opiates. I ended up relapsing while I was taking the Suboxone.
On August 25th, 2015, I accidentally overdosed and killed myself in my bathroom from Heroin laced with Fentanyl. My dad found me on the bathroom floor. My lips were blue and my skin was starting to harden. My dad immediately dragged my dead body into the hallway and started giving me CPR. I didn't even have a pulse. I was dead for 8 minutes straight. When the ambulance arrived at my house, they started to feel a light pulse. They gave me a shot of Narcan, but I didn't respond to it. So they gave me a 2nd shot of Narcan. And 20 seconds later, I finally woke up. To this day, I still feel ashamed for making my dad see my dead body on the floor, and for making him do CPR on me for 8 minutes, not knowing whether it was already too late.
I've been clean ever since that night. My new passion is helping other people understand that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. Whether they're suffering from a drug addiction, alcoholism, food addiction, or even if they have depression that has nothing to do with addiction.
I'm more than 25 lbs underweight and during middle school and high school, I'd have people make jokes about it almost every day. I used drugs to mask how I really felt on the inside. I developed a fear of judgement from others. Even if someone was genuinely complimenting me, my brain would perceive it as sarcasm. I would wear hoodies during summer because I was afraid to show my skinny body.
Now that I've been sober, I finally realize that I was believing things that weren't true. There really is a way to beat your depression/addiction. If there's one thing I learned over the years, it's that people with addiction and depression want to help each other. They need help from people who have experienced addiction and depression. They need to talk to people who were able to go through hell and come out on the other side.
So I decided to create a Facebook page called "Still Standing." I wanted to create an easy way for people to connect to others who are fighting the same demons. A place where people suffering from addiction and/or depression can help each other. It can also be a place where non-addicts can get a clearer understanding of what true depression/addiction is. I've always wanted to be a part of something important. This gives people the opportunity to save someone else's life, including my own. I truly believe that I was given a 2nd chance at life in order to save the life of another.
It's a non-profit organization/brand. Bluelight.org is a great website and helped me through my addiction. The Bluelight community is full of great people, but most addicts don't even know it exists (Unfortunately). So my question to you guys is: Would you guys/gals like to join me on this journey to raise awareness and give support to the people who need it the most?
This is my passion project because on average, 120 Americans die from an overdose EVERY SINGLE DAY. Between Bluelight's focus on harm reduction and Still Standing's focus on the men
tal aspect of depression and addiction, I know that we can lower that statistic and let others know that addiction isn't a death sentence unless you let it become one. I hope to see you join the Still Standing Community!
www.facebook.com/StillStandingCommunity
https://m.facebook.com/StillStandingCommunity
**Please share this post/page because you never know who is silently screaming for help on the inside.**
-Joe
