My friend is a heroin addict and I need advice on how to help

If you have had personal experience in helping a friend out with a heroin addiction, please share your input.

So a friend is already shooting up everyday for the last 2 months ago, scoring about $40 worth usually, and has already been treated for 2 abceses in his arm since he started a little less than a year ago.

This friend has known SWIM since early highschool, and know eachother relatively well. The thing is, he recognizes his addiction, has already had many of his friends talk with him; but he's not taking into account the repercussions of shooting up for too long. He's had a lot of support, before he started, he was into ills hardcore; most often opiates. So he's already piled 2 or 3 years of pill addiction before he started smoking and shooting. SWIM thinks he mostly scores tar.

Anyways, if anybody's been in a similar sitiuation, please give advice and perspective on this scenario.
How does one go about this situation?
What must one take into account?
Should one not expect to be successful?
Would medical marijuana help someone with a heroin addiction? Kratom?

Thank you for taking the time to read and answer this.

It's a little confusing to figure out who I am addressing but I am assuming that you are the friend and not the person shooting up. We don't use SWIM or any other stand in terms here on Bluelight. They don't really offer any protection and like I say, it can get confusing and deprive you of getting the responses you need.

Your friend is going to stay on this path until something inside him switches from the need to feel better to the need to survive--not just survive as a body but as the full person. No amount of hard facts, fear or even love from outside is going to change the trajectory of addiction until he himself is motivated to find his own source of love and strength inside.

The paradox of this is that you are both completely helpless and at the same time you can be a lifeline for a person in active addiction. Expressing your love and friendship, setting clear boundaries, and taking good care of yourself is all you can do. Try to keep yourself from judging your friend's decisions and actions on any kind of moral basis; this can be harder than it seems at first.

Remembering who your friend has always been when he is in the process of forgetting can be a lifeline. My brother was a crack addict for many years. He told my parents that if they had stopped believing in him that he would never have been able to once again--after twenty years of addiction!--believe in himself enough to start the recovery process. The faith that my parents had in my brother still impresses me as one of the most beautiful examples of love that I have ever seen.

I do not think that one should expect to be "successful". You are setting yourself and your friend up for disappointment. Again, your friend's path is his own. Your path as a friend is to constantly decide how to give support. Support can be as simple as listening or bringing something nutritious to eat. It can be a text that says, "I'm here for you if you need me".

I know that a lot of wonderful people here have been where your friend is and will be able to offer better advice than me. In my case, my experience is similar to yours, compounded by the fact that it was not a friend but my own son that was in the clutches of addiction. I know the helplessness and all the roller coaster emotions that come with that position and my heart goes out equally to both you and your friend.

Thank you so much for your response. It truly helps.

Absolutely wonderful response from herbivore. Seriously. I can't say that better myself and I HAVE been there. It's true; nothing is going to be able to stop him until he makes that conscious choice that he wants to quit. And for a lot of people, it takes a serious wake-up call (jail, intervention, the overdose of a friend, or a near death experience). Some (many, most even) keep going after that. Addiction is a vicious thing, especially when coupled with a preexisting sense of worthlessness and self-consciousness. It's far easier to run from all those feelings, all those consequences, even for just "one more day" than it is to actually confront them. And the longer it goes on, the more those feelings and consequences get to you, the bigger they seem, and the more you want to run from them. You don't want to let people down, and yet you are terrified of not having lived up to their standards already.

If you have any questions you'd like to ask me, please feel free to do it here or PM me. I have been an on and off IV heroin user for nigh on 8 years now. Mostly though, like the other poster said, you need to make sure he knows you're there, but not get too close. Those with active addictions are incredibly good at lying and manipulating and he will likely drag you down with him if given half a chance.

Strong advice posted in this thread.

Very nice post herby.