Tryin again:( quick sub tapper

love88 said:

Hi
so I posted like a month or two ago about getting off oxycodone and H...

Right now im at the 48hr mark ... I feel pretty ok. Last night at the like 26hr mark I took 2mg of sub. I took it bc I was thrashing around in my bed... It was the weirdest thing... I had RLS in like my arms. It was sooo weird and very uncomfortable. When I woke up at 10am,I was surprised that I slept that long and I felt sorta ok. I still moped around the house and I was taking gabapentin too.
Now tonight, I'm passed the 48hr mark. I don't know I'd I should take another 2mgs....

So I guess I'll wait to see how the night goes.

Thw reason I'm writing this is to Jus kinda vent. I'm craving soooo bad right now. And tomorrow I have work at 2pm and I'm getting sooo nervous. I use to always cop before work.... Im jus dreading going there sober ...

Click to expand...

So I know no one replied bc i dont have exact question.... Now I do today though.
so I ended up only taking 1mgs of sub at like 9am this morning. It was around the 60th hour. I was very surprised that my initial dose of 2mgs of sub lasted me like 30 some hours until I needed to redose the 1mg.
Now at 72 hours, I fucked up.... I got done work an I ended up coppin a small amount.

My question is when u decided to get sober, did something happen that it was like "I jus can't do this anymore". And when u did decide to get sober, did u slip up? Did it take many times to finally have long periods of time being sober?

I had another fight w my stupid ass bf... Jus the sound of his voice made me want to use. So as we were fighting and thing got physical(isn't the first time). I'm jus thinking "I can't do this anymore". He claims he "helps me" but really, he does more damage... Calls me horrible names, tells me im dirty, that im a slut junky whore(which is weird cause I never ever turned tricks or anything like tht. Infact I've only had like a handful of bfs) so I broke it off and I'm at my parents. I'm not tht young anymore and I need to get a place of my own.... I never thought that I'd be by myself, but that's how it's looking and I'm starting to accept that.
And I need to get sober. I never really tried until this year. I haven't gone more then 3 or 4 days... I guess that's better then the other years of using everyday and maybe having one day sober here n there and that's bc my dealer wasn't around or whatever.

So what moment did u KNOW that it was time?!

Keep at it 88. I think you did a smart thing by breaking it off with that guy. from your description he sounds pretty abusive. Wehn i honestly looked at how the drugs made me feal i realized they made me miserable. Why would i want to be miserable. Then I made recovery my number one priority. I made it through the acutes which lasted for almost two months for me. Then I worked my way through the PAWS. healed my self from the wounds of addiction and created and implemented a strong plan to deal with the addiction and addressed the roots to my addiction which anxiety was a huge one. With addressing these issues and giving some time i realized that things would get better and easier. They have. Its a few months away from two years for me and I am happier and more peaceful than I have ever been in my life. I think a big step is when we go from doing all we can to not use the drugs to no longer wanting to do them. I think the best way to do this is to look at how the drugs actually make us feal all the time.

Your doing great.. its a process, so if we end up useing try and identify what you could have done different or what else needs to be done and make the adjustment and keep moving forward. You can do this

love88 said:

So I know no one replied bc i dont have exact question.... Now I do today though.
so I ended up only taking 1mgs of sub at like 9am this morning. It was around the 60th hour. I was very surprised that my initial dose of 2mgs of sub lasted me like 30 some hours until I needed to redose the 1mg.
Now at 72 hours, I fucked up.... I got done work an I ended up coppin a small amount.

My question is when u decided to get sober, did something happen that it was like "I jus can't do this anymore". And when u did decide to get sober, did u slip up? Did it take many times to finally have long periods of time being sober?

I had another fight w my stupid ass bf... Jus the sound of his voice made me want to use. So as we were fighting and thing got physical(isn't the first time). I'm jus thinking "I can't do this anymore". He claims he "helps me" but really, he does more damage... Calls me horrible names, tells me im dirty, that im a slut junky whore(which is weird cause I never ever turned tricks or anything like tht. Infact I've only had like a handful of bfs) so I broke it off and I'm at my parents. I'm not tht young anymore and I need to get a place of my own.... I never thought that I'd be by myself, but that's how it's looking and I'm starting to accept that.
And I need to get sober. I never really tried until this year. I haven't gone more then 3 or 4 days... I guess that's better then the other years of using everyday and maybe having one day sober here n there and that's bc my dealer wasn't around or whatever.

So what moment did u KNOW that it was time?!

Click to expand...

Nobody can tell, its different for everybody. However you sound like you might have had enough pain. Pain is a major motivator for many to get sober.