been clean for 1.5 years, worried about health consequences

Hi guys, I've had a brief period of street drug use, and have been suffering from anxiety, depression and panic attacks whenever I'm reminded of all the garbage I used to put into my body. I'm afraid that I'm going to get cancer and die or that I have done my body irreversible damage. I'm going to give you some background.

in november 2012, I started using lot of T4 and oxycodone for dental pain. I also started doing cocaine. A few weeks after I started smoking heroin (tinfoil straw method). I took ecstacy handful of times. I smoked meth a few times. Marijuana and tobacco all the time.

One day in december, I found it hard to breath. I went to the doctor and said it was drug induced asthma. I coughed up blood and got freaked out, got xray, doctor said it was okay. So my coke and heroin usage was almost everyday, for a good month and a half. After this, I immediately stopped. I got through heroin withdrawl by smoking meth to get some energy to move about.

After January 2013, I only smoked marijuana and tobacco everyday. The marijuana always smelled like febreeze, I'm kinda worried maybe it had been sprayed with some shit to get more high. whenever I was running I used to get tight chested, had to rely on inhalers all the time. I had a lot of phlegm development in the morning. In december 2013, I stopped tobacco, alcohol, weed.

Fast forward to now, I've been clean from the hard stuff for over a year. I've been clean from tobacco, alcohol, weed for a good 5 month now.

I have no desire to do drugs anymore. I've been jogging, working out, and all around living a healthy lifestyle with no substance. I love it.

However, I'm always filled with fear and anxiety because of my past drug use. I'm afraid the street drugs I have no idea of knowing whether they were good quality or mixed with other shit. I'm afraid of all these stuff I read about drugs and wish I had read it earlier. I'm afraid of getting lung cancer and dying, so much that I am thinking of getting CT scans regularly. I'm afraid to have live forever not knowing whether my drug use will have robbed me of the ability to live a full life span. Lot of crazy anxieties and worries.

What should I do?

I think that what you are describing is normal.

When we're active in our addiction, and using a lot or frequently things can get pretty crazy and out of control.

It's only when you get some sober time, and look back you realize how lucky you are and how crazy things were, and how you do not want to go back to being like that.

I've also been sober for almost 2 years and I still worry about the health effects of lots of alcohol and smoking cannabis.

Talking to a doctor or medical professional does help and just be honest with them.

It takes a lot more than 6 months of drug use to do serious damage, so long as you're not shooting up meth or eating grams of E every week.
Just focus your health concerns into better diet & excercise and you'll more than make up for any perceived damage.

Sounds like you're just anxious. By the way, congratulations! That couldn't have been easy. I did something similar about a year ago, quitting a number of drugs in a short period of time.

thanks man that makes me feel a bit better.

well it was under 2 months. 1 month of everyday smoking heroin on tinfoil and straw, and snorting cocaine the rest of the time. I also smoked weed and tobacco during this time. ecstacy i took about 4 times and it was not at all fun when the high wore off.

I smoked meth only a few times during this time, I actually took a lot, ended up staying awake for days, and it was not enjoyable at all.

I would say the hard drug usage worries me the most.

after this hard drug phase was over, i continued to smoke tobacco and weed. the weed always smelled like febreeze or something. I'm sure it was sprayed with some shit.

time to time, I get just panicky and filled with despair and regrets.

Ho-Chi-Minh said:

Sounds like you're just anxious. By the way, congratulations! That couldn't have been easy. I did something similar about a year ago, quitting a number of drugs in a short period of time.

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thanks man it was tough. I think if I kept going with the hard stuff it would've been far more difficult to quit. I'm glad I jumped that boat early on.

it's funny, the year I quit the hard stuff, I didn't think too much about health consequences. it was after over a year and a state of drug free and healthy living the anxiety started to settle in, it was like "oh my fucking god I can't believe I did all that shit it's like a bad dream".