Drugs and the Gay community (merged threads)

American sexuality is very backward and repressed. We live in a society where role models look like stippers, but so much as a hug from one straight man to another is often too close for comfort.

Gay men either do or do not arrive to their sexuality by realizing or admiting to themselves that they are different. I don't know any gay men who don't struggle with this awakening. And anyone who's been through this change knows the liberation that comes with embracing the fag within- to revel in all that is wonderful about male on male sexuality.

Meth caters to gays because it liberates sexuality. After a couple bowls of crystal, being a faggot isn't scary, it's sexy. Your inhibitions are low, sexual identity is enhanced and you're able to get mentally naked.

Gay culture is still a rebellious teen, dealing with his guilt issues. How appropriate for such a drug as meth to come along and sweep away that sexual alienation. I say if we all were able to free ourselves sexually in this society, there wouldn't be such an explosive meth circut.

On the same token, one could see why for a fag meth can be an addictive escape. If one can't incorperate the freedom Tina invokes into their life, they're probably doomed to either becoming dependant on her, or must choose to wave goodbye to such fearless exploration of such a repressed piece of themselves.

"Once you get the message you should hang up the phone" was a mantra introduced in the 80's in the rave/club community. It was a message amongst ecstacy users which could translate to "let this drug teach you what it can, but learn to have/know it without a pill". Perhaps some of us can learn to erode through walls of sexual repression so that drugs like meth aren't the only way to break through identity programming and social guilt.

as if meth could possibly have a worse reputation, now gay people use it. thats just fucking dandy

caige, i know what you mean. i live in a small town and i have a gay friend that got into the tweaker/rave culture in a nearby city and being in that atmosphere (and out of our redneck small town) helped him grow and accept himself. its all about being around people that are going through the same things as you and it just so happens that the rave culture in my area has a high number of gays.

nemesis-a said:

as if meth could possibly have a worse reputation, now gay people use it. thats just fucking dandy

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are you joking? f* off

I've seen a few gay men I've known go through this with meth. I attribute it to the fact that meth will help you talk more openly on such issuse like being gay which may tear someone apart to talk about sober. And secondly, fucking great sex! You can't deny it, MDMA will make you talk but meth will amp you up like nobodys bussiness. The more you dive deeper into that situation the harder it becomes to get any learning out of it since now partying on meth becomes the norm. But that is simply the price some people pay to learn about themselfs untill hopefully they can move on.

good and interesting read.

I understand why gays are drawn towards meth but i do not believe that using meth will ever help incorporate homosexuality into mainstream culture, or help the struggle of gays (but i guess this isnt the goal either, as you stated that meth is only useful for aiding someone is becoming comfortable with their sexuality.

on a side note: when a gay dude refers to himself or a friend as a fag... is this kinda like the same thing as when a black person refers to himself or peer as a "nigga"?...like its only non-offensive when used within the community. I ask this in all seriousness.

if you'd have asked me how i felt about the "nigga/nigger" issue a few months ago i'd have said it is a complete doublestandard ... but i can understand from a gay point of view of taking something associated with negativity/ something that is looked down upon and accepting it for what it is, and liberating the meaning of that word- such as "fag." it's about really settling into your gay identity, about embracing the root of certain stereotypes as they truely are and getting past the negativity associated with them.

as for it's use by others, i see my hypocricy and am still battling with how i feel about certain language. i guess it's the difference of being called a druggie, and sketching the word on your notebook in high school- it would be offencive for your dad or principal to call you a junkie pothead (lol) because of how he's using the term, but amongst friends, we could revel in our potheadedness and it was more of a community thing instead of an insult. so i guess it's all in the eye of the beholder

as for my use of the word "fag" in the first post, i wasn't referring to gay men, i was referring to an archetype in gay culture (but is found outside of gay culture) that has a specific connetation, meaning and associated implication













...am i making ANY sence??? this is very hard to verbalize. i'm surprised i've made it this far

the word 'bitch' could translate to "(usually female) who disregards a classic 'lady' standard by expressing herself honestly and sometimes offensively"

a woman who fits this descrition could liberate the word "bitch" and apply it to herself because she is a persacuted female who is simply speaking her mind. it feels empowering for her to break through the negative implication of the word and embrace her honest and upfront personality.

but when someone calls her a 'bitch', they're using the word to insult her cheractor, to call her out as cold and unfemanine


...think "revenge of the nerds"

no, its okay.... I dont think you should have to defend yourself. I understand why it happens... it is impowering or liberating for a black people to be able to refer to each other an "nigga" and not have it mean something negative, when for so long other people chose to use it as a negative word.

i was simply wondering if gay men using the word fag, is one of those instances. edit: and i see now that it is

it can be ... if it's used with the right intention. but it's common to see a gay man call another gay man a "fag" with clearly hateful intention

interesting.

I like hearing about this kind of stuff, b/c i am a completely open-minded liberal person that is surrounded by suppressive conservative douchbags... and so the only way I really progress with the modern socialization of the rest of society is to talk to people online, study other languages, and travel

Heh, I got a claws for using 'faggot' when this guy used it throughout his entire first post. What gives ? Anyways, I think the whole 'gay culture' is lame in the first place, if we want to stop segrigation and prejudice then we have to stop seperating people into little groups. Any drug that lowers inhibitions could help gays 'come out' but I disagree with the method. If you need drugs just to express who you are I think there are more underlying problems that you need to deal with instead of using tina. Tina is pretty much like a death warrent for anyone who becomes addicted, a very sad spectical.

On a side note : I know a ton of stright acting gay men who are awesome guys. I think this whole flamboyant gay behavior is pathetic, and so do they. It's not who they were before they were gay so now all of a sudden why do they come out and start lisping, giving loose wrist handshakes and flailing their hands around when they do anything ? I mean, be who you are. Don't front or change your behavior just to 'fit in'.

>>Heh, I got a claws for using 'faggot' when this guy used it throughout his entire first post. What gives ? >>

What gives? Context matters.

>>I think this whole flamboyant gay behavior is pathetic, and so do they.>>

On the other hand, it's going to be a lot easier to pick up a date if potential dates know your sexual orientation.

ebola

Originally posted by psychetool
On a side note : I know a ton of stright acting gay men who are awesome guys. I think this whole flamboyant gay behavior is pathetic, and so do they. It's not who they were before they were gay so now all of a sudden why do they come out and start lisping, giving loose wrist handshakes and flailing their hands around when they do anything ? I mean, be who you are. Don't front or change your behavior just to 'fit in'.

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Calling oneself "straight acting" is a self hating act. Just what is "straight acting" anyway? I usually run from any guy who calles himself straight acting. By definition it means acting like someone other than yourself. If you aren't straight, why would you "act" that way?

Hell, why Bother defining yourself in a way that contradicts the real you? Why can't people just act like themselves and not have to defend it against norms of sexuality - which are usually archaic and boring as rule.

Fact is, some guys come out and "try on" the gay role by over shooting the goal - lisping, screaming, limp wristed etc. They have struggled to define themselves for so long, they dive right into the stereotype in an effort to finally belong to something.

Real sexual freedom can be enjoyed only when you realize that sexuality only offers barriers that you create. The joy of deviating from the norm is that you can define yourself in any way you see fit - far beyond the the lazy labels of "fag", "gay", "straight", "straight acting" etc...

Evolve.

Since there are no mods for DC I'll step in and say that I won't hesitate to hand out warnings to anyone who doesn't keep it clean. The use of words like "fag" and "faggot" in context is probably not that big a deal unless someone wants to speak up and say they are patently offended. I don't think anything here is glaringly warnable, but I figured I'd throw my .02 in because I happen to know a lot about this subject

I grew up in an area with LOADS of gay men who engaged in all kinds of risky behavior... most noticeable was meth. My best friend in Florida (a gay man) probably owes his HIV+ status to becoming a gigolo to support his tweek habit. I was always staunchly anti-meth because of that but eventually I cracked and tried it. I was not too impressed, but when I did it a couple years later, I liked it a lot. I learned to respect it and nothing horrible happened, but I still have a couple moments I wish I had a do-over pass for.

Gay guys often have good jobs and no spouse or kids, so that means more money to spend on drugs if they are so inclined. Many, many weekends I refused to hang out with my friend in Miami if I knew he had been using because, to be perfectly honest, most tweekers, gay or straight, annoy the shit out of me.

I now live in San Francisco, where there are a lot of young gay men who party, with meth, whatever, the same shit straight people use. There were 3 gay guys on the train home today who had obviously been tweeking. They were being extremely rude and (dare I say it) bitchy- talking loudly and disrespecting elderly people. They SMELLED like meth, I swear I can tell when people have been using by the smell. They were talking about taking the huge garbage bag to the used clothing store so they could get money to go score some speed, and it made me very sad because who the fuck knows what they were doing the 5 days they were up before then?

I definitely think meth makes one more inclined to take risks. That includes bareback sex and needle sharing. I have no idea how many gay meth users shoot meth but I'd say about 50% of the ones I have known shoot. I have never personally witnessed unsafe shooting (and I have been around people who were shooting meth, though I have never done an IV drug) but I know it definitely exists. Just like glory holes, bug chasing, STDs and the tremendous HIV epidemic, meth use is associated with the gay community.

It's no accident that several anti-meth billboards are located in the 2 stations of the subway here in SF that run through an area (the Castro) with an overwhelmingly gay population. They aren't too preachy- they're designed to maybe make 2 guys partying with meth together have the condoms right there and commit to stay healthy. I hope they help some people, but meth is one of those drugs that you use that makes you really "live in the moment." That is its greatest strength and its greatest weakness, and it should be used with the utmost respect.

(and no, this was not written with the help of meth, this is just a long post :D)

mariposa420 said:

Since there are no mods for DC I'll step in and say that I won't hesitate to hand out warnings to anyone who doesn't keep it clean.

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Agreed.

I know a ton of stright acting gay men who are awesome guys.

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so gays are only okay, when they act like you, or something they are not? thats pretty lame IMO...Maybe if you didnt feel gays should be "straight acting" then they wouldnt feel the need to (for the most part) stay seperate from mainstream society.

I agree, Spunk. Stright acting was not the correct term. I should have just said be themselves, who they were before the whole 'stereotype' came out. One of my gay coworkers named andy is always talking about how the whole flamboyant behavior is just a mask for not understanding their own personality and trying to fit into a group. While I can understand this and agree with the concept, I don't agree with the practice. I look at it as more of a weakness then a strength, because they are just 'falling in' with other gays instead of coming into the realization of who they really are. Especially trying to utilize hard drugs to be more confident about their sexuality, I don't get it. Why would you need drugs to help you feel confident about something that you already beleive is acceptable behavior ?