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  • AADD Moderators: swilow | Vagabond696

Returning to pills, or maybe not???

pillsizwatuneed

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 6, 2003
Messages
35
Right this is something i've been asking myself for a few days and i can't answer so i thought you bl crew could help.

I used to be a regular pill popper until september 03, i mean doing it solidly every weekend friday and saturday night. This was until the pink bacardi's the perth crew will remember being so widespread. After one weekend of been off my tit's the following weekend which included much rock and no sleep I popped a bacardi. The whole time pilling i just wanted the e to just fade into nothing i hated the roll and wished i'd never popped it. I smoked cones the next day had a panic attack and blacked out. So after a lenghty break off weed i started smoking again which doesn't really have that many negative effects so i thought it was just the pills.

But now a year and a bit on I think I'm ready to drop a biccy on new year's. The only thing is I've got to much anxiety of what happens if it's another bacardi episode, or maybe that was just a sign of not to bother again. But yeh i really want to but at the same time what if i can't handle it, i know what it's like it's to late and you have to ride it out for a few hours.

Is there anyway I can just pop it without having these anxieties in the back off my head worrying that i'm gonna fuck up??
 
Sounds like you had an incredible bastard of an experiance on the bacardi's! I doubt anything is going to calm your anxiety over popping again, other than you working through it yourself. Then again, after everything else you'd taken PLUS lack of sleep, it may have been just a nutter of an idea to eat that last bikkie, and your body was telling you so.
I'm not sure how it runs for you, but I've never broken these two rules when I take ANY type of drug -

1. Do it with people you feel comfortable with,
2. Do it in a place you feel comfortable being.

Pretty much common sense. I figure if you drop and it turns into a bad roll then you'll be in a setting with friends that can calm you down and take care of you.
If you're just out in a club it might be a freak-out waiting to happen. . .

Perhaps taking half first would help out your anxiety? Take care, whatever you choose to do. :)

Peace, Ivy...
 
IvyVine: I think you have supplied some pretty sound advice there. Thumbs up ta ya =)

pillsizwatuneed: I think that being open about how you feel with people who are going with you may help a little. I also think that trying not to make it seem a big deal is important as well! Good luck with it.
 
Wow... seems i'm not the only one in this boat then! about 2 months ago, following a 2c-t-7 trip flip out and a 2c-b hospital run... Now getting high on anything makes me anxious and unsettled... even beer and coffee! The weeks previous to this, my pill experiances just plain made me sick.. the very feeling of 'gurning' wasn't plesurable at all...

Just last night i had a small panic attack from even thinking about the 2c-b night and what might happen at an event coming up next yr...

I've found that i've had to get use to being 'high' again... can now drink a bit without wanting it all to stop... Hope to do the same at this event.. start with the smallest amount possible and work up to a full blown gurn if i can :)

You can always eat more, but you can never remove what you've taken... Don't just jump into the deepend if you're not sure that you can swim...
 
I think the same rule applies with all chemicals.
If you are not 100% sure that you want to do it, then you possible shouldnt.
A lot has to do with setting, but even more than that is your mind set. If you have negative thoughts or fear of anxiety in the back of your mind, this can be amplified.

If you do decide to go ahead with this, I agree that you should try in a comfortable setting with good friends, but incase you do have a panic attack and need help from your friends, do you think it is fair to them, to have to look out for you on NYE?
How about you try it on a quiet night, on a random weekend, in a comfortable setting and see how you go from there first? Then you can perhaps have someone sober trip sit you incase anything goes wrong.

Anyway...good luck, and I hope you have a good evening :)
 
Cheers for your advice people's. Despite my doubts I've made the decision to PROBABLY drop 2nite. I've worked my arse off going from source to source finding out who's got the cleanest, not necessarily the best, biccies. I used to find that i enjoy a nice clean one rather than one that puts me on my hole anyway. I think if I go a half and have a certain amount of both mental and physical control i should be right. I got some white domes and apparently are pretty good and quite clean. I rejected the offer of the pink mitsu's straight away after my last 'pink pill' episode.

I think I should be rite cos back then i was a 'biccy muncher who'd lost the magic' and was on a journey of depression and paranoia. Not like happy me now! Just don't wanna get hooked on that feeling again.

Wish me luck anyways.
Hope Everyone has a happy and safe new year.

Pillzizwatuneed
 
What happend did you eat the pill?it's like waching a movie that stops half way through!!!:(

p's go the mitzis =D
 
yeah good one....Did u eat it??? Like everyones probably worried now!! :(
 
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