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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Withdrawn, different this time?

R

Roxi808

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 22, 2015
Messages
121
Sorry if this is a duplicate post, the first one didn't seem to post.

Long story short, addicted to oxy for a year and a half, switched to sub, got off that no problem (very long slow taper and vigorous excersize is the key), stayed clean for like two years then dabbled and got right back to where I was, exept this time I needed like 240-300 mgs a day to even feel normal. Did that for about six months, then switched to Kratom to try and taper off.

Had a really hard time tapering, and would binge on oxy like a day or two a week. Then my dealer got a hold of some really cheap methadone 10mgs which I loved and went way overboard with stupid I know. So I binged on dones for a month (high doses like 80 mg a day) with some oxy here and there.

Took my last methadone about a week and a half ago and have switched back to Kratom (which btw is a wonder drug for opiate addicts imo)...took huge amounts of Kratom daily with 3 big oxy binge days in there the last week and a half...the switch from dones to Kratom was painful to say the least but I was pretty stable feeling pretty good the last 3 days.

Ok, today is my first full day with zero opiates (except for some lope, like 10mgs) and I DO NOT feel OK...could be worse but I'm super restless, anxiety, aching, etc...I guess my question is I'm not looking at a normal withdrawal timetable maybe? The pain experienced with the last week of Kratom has hopefully at least brought me to a reasonable level. I assume the methadone has cleared my system? Does that matter in regards to the nightmare stories you hear about methadone withdrawal? It's been about eleven days since my last done and 4 days since my last oxy dose of 90 mg....only Kratom, about ten mg 3 times a day, and my last dose of that was about 24 hours ago.

I'm hoping to turn the corner in like 3-4 days, but this is a different, kind of poly-opiate (from super strong to super weak) withdrawal...I don't know what to expect but little victory today I rode my bike past the head shop where I get Kratom and didn't even look at it (I guess it's a victory that I was on my bike at all)...I work at sea so once we sail in about 3 hours there will be zero chance of getting any opiates, and that is the plan, but work is a fucking nightmare feeling like this..

Thanks for reading gang, any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!
 
I know when I filled a 2 week dry spell using 30mg done a day , it took a few weeks to get my head back - even at ~ 100mg oxy / day ........ It really lingers , waking up all sweaty and pissed that you have to be you for the day shit - gross !
I would suggest sticking w kratom a few weeks , it makes a world of diff. - not as much as you were using thou , like 4g. Am / 2-3G. Afternoon of green strain has made my jump after a decade a breeze ( well , a breeze as far as a jump can be - but real good days )
Keep it up man ! I'm on day 10
 
Thanks icup yeah I'm almost done with day 2 and it was bad, could have been worse though...I've been through about 5 withdrawals and I've usually gotten a little better on day 3 but not sure what to expect...I'm honestly not as bad as I thought but still sucks, just a restless but exhausted feeling and super sensitive to cold...the loperamide didn't do shit yesterday so I didn't take any today, all it did was tweak my stomach.

I have no chance of getting any more Kratom for a couple days so I figure I might as well rough it out, also I need to be better by 2-3 weeks from now as I'm going on a trip with my family and there is no way I can handle a withdrawal during that...

Thanks for the support!
 
Day 5 from all opiates, my only symptom is absolutely zero energy and all day fatigue no matter what I do...could it still be the methadone that I haven't touched in two weeks? Been taking mega dose vitamins, magnesium, zinc, couple monster energy drinks..,I don't know how long does this fatigue last? Forced myself to do some exercises today which didn't make me feel any better...any advice?
 
Gaba is always my savior. If I take enough, I'm zooming. Gaba is a love it or leave it kind of thing. On the other hand kratom doesn't ever do anything for me.
Immodium and gaba. It's worth a try.
 
Gaba as in gabapentin or lyrica? Or is there a supplement called gaba?
 
So for anyone that's listening, day 7 my only symptom is zero energy and just a shitty malaise...currently at the gym forcing myself to left weights, feels pretty good.

My last withdrawals I turned a very noticeable corner in like 4-5 days, but this time, I don't know wtf, I'm baffled...I have just a demoralizing lack of energy,
Any thoughts?

Btw eating good, taking vitamins, fish oil, sleeping ok....working full time through all this too
 
I think by gaba he meant gabapentin. It helps massively, as does its big brother phenibut. If you can get any of the two, they will help. Just don't take them too long, I hear they have their own withdrawal syndrome and it ain't fun. But I'd only use them if you have RLS or insomnia.

I'd cut off anything that binds to your mu-opioid receptors after you've made it 7 days.

It will end soon. That is for sure. Hang in there and keep your eyes on the prize. Use us as a crutch if you need to. Dark Side, Sober Living, and Healthy Living are great forums. Check them out to kill time and interact with other BL'ers.

How are you feeling today? Have you been getting sleep? I didn't see you mention that.
 
Thanks man, end of day 8 right now, the only thing I've taken that is an opioid is loperamide only twice in 8 days though and it didn't do shit for me.

Sleeping has been OK, I'll sleep for like two hours with fucked up dreams, (like weirdly sexual dreams) wake up then back to sleep like a few times a night, not really restful sleep but I am sleeping so that's good.

This morning I actually turned a huge corner, I felt astonishingly normal..,haven't felt like that in a year. Makes me optimistic for tomorrow...energy is returning, thanks for replying. Mostly worried about self control issues now, and being bored in general without drugs. I need to extinguish the thought in my head of how much more fun everything would be if I gobbled 4 roxi 30s. Ugh
 
You've come so far, you know you can do it. The worst move you could possibly make right now is evaporate the hard work of the last week by giving in to the urges.

I'm happy to hear you're sleeping. Insomnia is the w/d symptom I personally fear the most, I don't know about others. One night of no sleep and I am a barely functional sociopath the entire next day. So...very stoked to hear you are sleeping (even if it's in small chunks, it's better than nothing, and the weird sexual dreams are par for the course...I've had wet dreams during the only 10 minutes of light sleep I got on a night of detox insomnia before, sorry if that was TMI).

The boredom can be alleviated by keeping yourself busy with things you enjoy. What kind of hobbies/activities did you enjoy before you started with the opioids? Usually when we're in the midst of our addictions, we let these things slip away. Try to identify these and immerse yourself (slowly) back into them. Staying busy with things that bring you joy will stave off the cravings.

You're almost past the hump, or possibly even have made it over the climax and are on the way down to level ground.

Feel free to PM me anytime you need anything, and as you know, your BL peers are here for you. Keep your eyes on the prize!

And don't forget to update us from time to time =)

Edit: One more tip - usually when we use opioids, we tend to withdraw into our own little world and become absent in social places we used to occupy. Try also to reconnect with friends if that's happened to you. Isolation itself can lead to relapse.
 
I'd just add to be careful with the lope. I was bad on that for a while and had the worst wds from it.
 
Thanks Raysu, I've read that. That and the fact that it does nothing for me is why I only took it 2 out of the last 9 days so far...
 
Oh good Roxi anytime! I know that would've helped me had I learned sooner than the hard way. Good you didn't have to learn the hard way.
 
Sooo yeah, on my 11th day I basically went on a two day oxy binge (12th and 13th days) where I ate about 240 mgs of oxy over two days...now I'm on day 2 from that and I don't feel serious withdrawal symptoms but I do have that crazy demoralizing lack of energy with some depression and anxiety in there..,did I totally go back to square one? I pretty much deserve it if I did... Anyone have any experience with this? Will I get better a little faster because it was just a quick binge? I know I'm a fucking idiot and an addict and I feel REALLY stupid, but I'm hoping to get over this quick, any thoughts?
 
Yeah. If at every relapse there was a consistent use for the same amount of days it would progressively worsen noticeably each time. Shortening days/doses and/or going with alternate ROAs with lower BA won't make it as bad but IMO once the bad wds begin then each relapse has some consequence even if it's just being zapped of energy. It would maybe take a lot of clean time otherwise like I suppose if a dozen years away you repeat a two day bender, the comedown may be too slight to notice. Just a guess on that though because drugs do alter the body.
 
When I cold turkeyed two weeks ago it was after about a year of some kind of opiate every day, I just want to know if I set myself back to that point or do you think will get better a little quicker? So stupid of me I would have been at least two weeks clean by now..,

basically went to a really high end private rooftop party in the city and was handed 8 blues for free and I had very little self control at that point....fuck me! Just shows me the situations I need to a avoid for a while if anything....I told that guy who gave me those to please not so that again, if he asked for money I most likely wouldn't have gotten them as I had no money anyway.

what sucks is day 9-11 I was starting to feel really good naturally...today I feel anxious I have the shits and I have no energy whatsoever. I've already used my "I have the flu" excuse at work and guys are tripping on my behavior today, I am super grouchy and can't focus on anything...its day two, hoping I feel a little better tomorrow?

Anyone else done this before? Input would be greatly appreciated!
 
Don't beat yourself up. I've done it too. Two days use after two weeks off won't set you back like you're fearing. Most likely you may feel rundown/restless a few days. I'd bet that 11 days from now will feel worlds better than the day you were having just before using. For me if I take a two week break I gotta use hard for a week or two to feel as rough again. Lots of water, good food, some good walks, and sleep will make the difference in bouncing back faster. Focus your attention on caring for yourself in that way as opposed to downing yourself. Mindset is huge. Feel better!
 
Thanks Raysu, reading that alone made me feel a little better, I think your right I'm in for a couple days of rundown/restless then on with my life...
 
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