Will I ever FEEL again?

[Elinay]

I'm Hannah. I was diagnosed with Bipolar1 1.5 years ago when I suffered a psychotic break after serious trauma. I was hospitalized and put on two medications; Tegretol and Risperdal. I stayed on Risperdal for a year and have just weened off the Tegretol. And have been off it for 3 weeks now. I hope I am not alone in my experience of severe anhedonia with the start of these medications.
I have lost all emotion. I have been functioning as a zombie for the past year and a half. I feel no joy, love, hope... nothing but flattness. Four months ago my prescriber took me off the Risperdal. I regained some mental clarity and personality after stopping it but had no return of emotion. I am currently taking 200mg of Seraquil, and no other medications for my illness.
I am an artist and scientist. I have lost all my passion and heart for my work. I am losing hope and I fear greatly that I am damaged permanently. I don't know what to do from here... All I can do is wait. Does anyone have any advice? Similar stories? Anything helps. I want my life back.I am so afraid this is permanent.

 

[Phil.McKeer]

I doubt it's anything permanent. Anhedonia is a common side effect of drug (ab)use and will pass as you get back to baseline after discontinuing the chemicals you were taking.

Have you tried changing up lifestyle elements like exercising, eating healthy, etc? These always help improve my mood when I'm in the dumps.

 

[###]

I'm Hannah. I was diagnosed with Bipolar1 1.5 years ago when I suffered a psychotic break after serious trauma. I was hospitalized and put on two medications; Tegretol and Risperdal. I stayed on Risperdal for a year and have just weened off the Tegretol. And have been off it for 3 weeks now. I hope I am not alone in my experience of severe anhedonia with the start of these medications.
I have lost all emotion. I have been functioning as a zombie for the past year and a half. I feel no joy, love, hope... nothing but flattness. Four months ago my prescriber took me off the Risperdal. I regained some mental clarity and personality after stopping it but had no return of emotion. I am currently taking 200mg of Seraquil, and no other medications for my illness.
I am an artist and scientist. I have lost all my passion and heart for my work. I am losing hope and I fear greatly that I am damaged permanently. I don't know what to do from here... All I can do is wait. Does anyone have any advice? Similar stories? Anything helps. I want my life back.I am so afraid this is permanent.

It is common effect of many, if not all antidepressants. Strange that you used the same term (I felt like zombie) I was using to describe my condition after two years of Tramadol addiction. Not opiod part of T was responsible for this, but its SNRI (antidepressant) one. That was actually the main reason I switched to Morphine, and since I did it, I feel like a normal person again. I got my passions back, I am able to feel an be happy again.