Why again?

[AtItAgain]

hey guys. i am new here. i am looking for support in rough times. i've been a long time reader of posts on this website.. never had the balls to join. but here i am now.

where do i begin? it all started back when i was a teen. pills are my DOC. i started out snorting, thanks to my surroundings. i wasn't instantly hooked. i could control myself. a couple years later, it all went down hill from there. i found myself spending all my money on the shit. never got a proper script. no drs to blame. in Jan of 2015 i got clean. went cold turkey. it was ruining my life. later that year i found out i was pregnant. things were great. i had my son, got my tubes tied and then it happened. my uterus is bad. long story short, my obgyn has been prescribing me perc 5's for the last several months. my body became dependent and here i am again. physically and mentally addicted. i ran out of my script and my dr is on vacation right now. so im left out in the cold. my boyfriend bought me 6 vic 10s, at a whopping 9 dollars a piece. i am ashamed. these will only last until tomorrow..then what? all i wanna do is lay down and cry. not worry about anything. idk what im really looking for here.. words or encouragement? i have surgery (hysterectomy) apr 4th. after that, im done for good.

thanks for listening.

 

[hydroazuanacaine]

welcome to bluelight. terrible being addicted to a substance that you need therapeutically. wishing you and your family the best.

 

[herbavore]

I think you need to see a new doctor and get yourself started on a taper. What specifically is wrong with your uterus? If you have had your tubes tied, is a hysterectomy not an option? A life of drug dependence is a miserable life not only for you but for your child as well. As difficult and daunting as it may seem to get off the percs (and any other pills) I know in your heart you want to. It can feel so overwhelming and impossible but take concrete steps, one at a time and keep your goal always in sight. The first step I think you should take is changing doctors and at least talking about alternatives to uterine pain. The second step would be to work with an addiction counselor if at all possible. What about a support group for parents trying to stop drugs? Any way you approach it, recovery is what you need to be focused on. Is your boyfriend using drugs?

 

[johnnypotsmoker199]

I would look into suboxone.

It can do wonders and it also isn't as habit forming as other opiates. I was able to take suboxone when addicted for about a week and stop with no physical withdraw effects.

If you continue to use opiates, you will likely feed into the habit that you will struggle one day to break from. Can't last forever so I would look into other options instead of feeding the opiate addiction.

Maybe even find a clinic you can stay in for a week or so on a suboxone maintenance program.

You could also speak with your doctor directly about subutex which will provide pain relief with less addicting attributes.