legionscube
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 25, 2016
- Messages
- 8
I am 22 now and I have been feeling confused, about who I am and scared about having a lack of identity with a life without drugs. Drugs have been my primary focus in life since I was about 15, moderately to heavily experimenting with all kinds of drugs, anything I could get my hands on. Mushrooms especially have played a big role in understanding and seeing my soul and the souls of my loved ones and my friends, seeing the beauty in them and the parts and aren't so pretty, but at the same time I was using amphetamines, hydros and other opiets, and found that my human being was nothing more than cage with an empty shell.
It was almost as if my soul and spirit was so disconnected from my human that I literally did soul searching and couldn't figure out who i was as a human being. I have learned over the last couple years to connect the two, and when you know yourself, spiritually (your soul), and physically (your human) than that is the key to truly finding yourself. That is what i believe. Plus, I really think it takes a lifetime, and if you believe in reincarnation, than it could take lifetimes to truly find yourself and what your mission is here on earth.
Drugs made me believe that i was a demon for a long time, and a lizard even for a couple months, but i figured out that we all have higher selves and lower selves, and the evil things that i discovered about who I was is apart of my lower self, and as time went on and I got older, I started focusing on who I was, the real me that lives in my higher self. Since I have been focusing my energy on finding who I am in my higher self I have needed drugs less and less as catalysts to reach who I am. My higher self is angelic and a healer, but unfortunately I am still a human which means I make mistakes, and have to translate who I am spiritually to my human self.
Even though it's all connected, I have to live as my human or i am going to become completely disconnected from reality which scares me so badly.. I have made great progress in grounding myself back to the earthly plane, and finding myself in a human fashion whilst trying my best to live in my higher self. Because i am a human, of course my lower self will come out sometimes. I am still addicted to opiates, and that is not helping me live in my higher self as much as i want to be. As long as I try my best to live in my higher self as much as possible that is the best I can do, because I am human. As a teenager I hardly knew who i truly was. Drugs (especially psychedelics) helped me find the good and the bad, but now these opiates that I am addicted to are weighing me down in my soul searching, keeping me in my lower self more than I need to be.
Because my goal in life is not to live in my lower self, I need to live in my higher self as my human, and then i will truly know who I am. Also, finding my soul mate has proved that the will of my higher self is stronger than the will of my lower self. Existence is painful and tragic, but being a human is probably the most beautiful experience our souls could possibly have. I hope this made sense or helped somebody out there, but if it didn't than this was an extremely therapeutic and necessary action for me to type this out.... Thank you.
P.S. I really don't think that anybody on the entire planet has found the meaning of life. There are defiantly aspects that almost everybody has discovered about it, but no one person has found the exact whole truth of what it means to exist.
It was almost as if my soul and spirit was so disconnected from my human that I literally did soul searching and couldn't figure out who i was as a human being. I have learned over the last couple years to connect the two, and when you know yourself, spiritually (your soul), and physically (your human) than that is the key to truly finding yourself. That is what i believe. Plus, I really think it takes a lifetime, and if you believe in reincarnation, than it could take lifetimes to truly find yourself and what your mission is here on earth.
Drugs made me believe that i was a demon for a long time, and a lizard even for a couple months, but i figured out that we all have higher selves and lower selves, and the evil things that i discovered about who I was is apart of my lower self, and as time went on and I got older, I started focusing on who I was, the real me that lives in my higher self. Since I have been focusing my energy on finding who I am in my higher self I have needed drugs less and less as catalysts to reach who I am. My higher self is angelic and a healer, but unfortunately I am still a human which means I make mistakes, and have to translate who I am spiritually to my human self.
Even though it's all connected, I have to live as my human or i am going to become completely disconnected from reality which scares me so badly.. I have made great progress in grounding myself back to the earthly plane, and finding myself in a human fashion whilst trying my best to live in my higher self. Because i am a human, of course my lower self will come out sometimes. I am still addicted to opiates, and that is not helping me live in my higher self as much as i want to be. As long as I try my best to live in my higher self as much as possible that is the best I can do, because I am human. As a teenager I hardly knew who i truly was. Drugs (especially psychedelics) helped me find the good and the bad, but now these opiates that I am addicted to are weighing me down in my soul searching, keeping me in my lower self more than I need to be.
Because my goal in life is not to live in my lower self, I need to live in my higher self as my human, and then i will truly know who I am. Also, finding my soul mate has proved that the will of my higher self is stronger than the will of my lower self. Existence is painful and tragic, but being a human is probably the most beautiful experience our souls could possibly have. I hope this made sense or helped somebody out there, but if it didn't than this was an extremely therapeutic and necessary action for me to type this out.... Thank you.
P.S. I really don't think that anybody on the entire planet has found the meaning of life. There are defiantly aspects that almost everybody has discovered about it, but no one person has found the exact whole truth of what it means to exist.
I did agree with that PS