The reason I use, some will relate I'll offer some insight and maybe you guys can too

[One_Speed_Dame]

Drug/alcohol abuse started for me around 13, 27 now. I was alcoholic by 15 addicted to xanx/kpin essentially any benzo from ~20 to 24 then 24 to recently heavy Oxy user. Obviously over the years of drinking some cocaine and other stuff made it's way in the mix and pill abuse was merely sporadic until 20's when solidified and became dependency. I was aimless find myself now at 27 putting my life and health back in order reached 393lbs now I'm around 215-216. I dropped out of school in the 10th grade because of all the mistakes and substances no license no friends, no meaningful relationships. Hit a humble moment, it was all my own fault. I could blame who Society? not societies problem I had no self control. My parents ? they're human and imperfect as all of us. I destroyed by body and life so I had thought. I found a revolutionary technique. Don't lie, ever. Constant commitment to honesty will be hard especially if you've done what I have and understand some others have. It's given me the strength and courage to face my darkness, WE ALL HAVE IT. every person is good AND evil. The goal is good while being capable of being evil only when necessary. Balance it out practice meditation. self reflection, my insurance and odd set up where I live rehab wasn't an option. I'm now in school, working out training BJJ and have a job orientation today for a good gig paying enough for further correct course. Anyone have similar experience ?
After constant self checking,analysis by myself and psychologist NOT psychiatrist. The key aspect the determining factor in all of my abuse was...Boredom. I get bored because of the mess I made and lack of responsibility, being aimless and useless. Drugs are any easy way to escape boredom but then drugs become a hell you must escape. So conclusion, sorry I got key heavy lol anyone else find boredom as the core reason ? and has anyone else tried these methods ?

Thanks Damien, A new dude with a new gig

 

[herbavore]

Many people cite boredom as a reason for using drugs. If the drugs become a problem you need strategies for boredom and those will be different for everyone. For me, I want engagement (in an activity or with other people, say); for my sons. they would have needed risk-taking or something that raises adrenaline.

One thing I think is great about your post is the lack of blame. Blame is a big impediment to change.

 

[lazydullard]

good post. boredom was my main trigger too. sober now, though.

 

[ShroomySatori]

Loneliness for me. That has always been the reason for me. I don't have intimate relations with the opposite sex, so ever since 15 I have been abusing one drug or another out of frustration. I believe it will lead to my death within a year or two, which will be a huge relief. For the longest time it was "just" weed all day every day, but that stopped working once I started getting panic attacks and just made things worse. Now it is daily benzos and heroin, I shot up for the first time a couple days ago, although for the moment I prefer sniffing.
Also I will occasionally use meth on a regular basis, and Mdma, oh and lets not forget the cocaine but those are of less interest to me. I like downer drugs, and I love ghb if I had a good connect for it I'd probably trade my benzo habit for daily use of it.
The only commonly used drugs I refuse to touch are cigarettes, weed, and alcohol, pretty much.

 

[One_Speed_Dame]

Loneliness for me. That has always been the reason for me. I don't have intimate relations with the opposite sex, so ever since 15 I have been abusing one drug or another out of frustration. I believe it will lead to my death within a year or two, which will be a huge relief. For the longest time it was "just" weed all day every day, but that stopped working once I started getting panic attacks and just made things worse. Now it is daily benzos and heroin, I shot up for the first time a couple days ago, although for the moment I prefer sniffing.
Also I will occasionally use meth on a regular basis, and Mdma, oh and lets not forget the cocaine but those are of less interest to me. I like downer drugs, and I love ghb if I had a good connect for it I'd probably trade my benzo habit for daily use of it.
The only commonly used drugs I refuse to touch are cigarettes, weed, and alcohol, pretty much.

ShroomySatori We're all pretty anonymous here. Can you identify why you seem to have no relations with the opposite sex? is lack of initiative fear of rejection in the mix ? The depression we get while on drugs is compounded by our critical view of ourselves and the abuse of any downer benzo,alcohol, opiates will inevitably cause worsened depression. I understand loneliness but I understand why I was lonely. People we seek the affection of firstly make sure they deserve it and if we want affection we have to be an individual who deserves it. We have to earn it. Society and the world are indifferent to our problems for the most part but establishing ourselves in society/community has benefits that pull us out of spirals of addiction. Does alcohol when you did use it if ever, did it produce anxiety maybe the next day ? Just here some of my past self in your post Shroomy

 

[One_Speed_Dame]

good post. boredom was my main trigger too. sober now, though.

Awesome to hear ! I don't think I'm alone in this, but metaphysical hell aside, people who've suffered addiction to a grand extent experience hell on earth. When you get through it, survive it, if you survive it. Makes us want to help others out of the hell or help others avoid it all together. Congrats Lazydullard!