opiatekrzy
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2004
- Messages
- 4,021
I been with my fiance adriana for 5yrs now, when i met her she was only an occasional weed smoker and drinker, we fell in love fast (due to the fact she was new to NY, cuz she moved from houston to NY(my hometown) and knew nobody, and ME i just got out of prison after serving 4yrs, so i was vulnerable to be with a woman just like she wanted a man. before i knew it, she was using hard drugs with me, and now we have 2 baby boy's, which CPS is already involved and were on the verge of losing custody. it seems like my love for her is gone, yet i go out my way to be with her to feel not alone, and i wonder do i love her or not? she is always miserable, were always fighting. seems like were just filling eachothers void. im just too weak to end it cuz of the fear of being alone, and fact we have 2kids 2gether, im so ready to find another girl, yet i dont even know myself or got my life together, so should i hold off on seeing other girls? (i been talking to this one girl, i feel like im misleading her, and invited me to her apartment to hang out) we all know sex will happen, i feel like i just want sex out of this girl, and no interest in chemistry, then again IDK..im a big mess, which is why this post is a big mess, im sory if i make no sense, i just dont know what to do with myself, with my fiance, with leaving her, with going to this girls apartment, etc.......