Strange trip report/General Psychedelic Questions

[GreatArc]

Howdy!

Rapid Fire Round:

1.) Tolerance. Where do it come from? Is more the drug or personal biology? As in, will tryptamine tolerance generally build and subside pretty reliably in most people taking the same doses or is there large variation?

2.) Is there something we can do to affect tolerance or recover it faster. (I am not some psychedelic demon fiend, just wondering if I wanted to trip twice close together if there are ways to augment tolerance? Diet and exercise? Drinking goat piss? Excessive masturbation? (No effect, evidently), anything else which might help tolerance return more quickly?

3.) Took 56mg of 4-Aco-DMT two nights ago and had a very strange experience. Very nice trip with faster and more active visuals than I've experienced before in my few explorations into psychedelics. But had a truly unique experience of full on short term/personal memory loss. Like amnesia right out of a movie, no anxiety, just a complete dead spot in my memory.

Emerged from my bedroom to encounter my best friend and very experienced trip sitter. In full possession of my faculties in some sense, but completely deranged in another. Example:

(N= My pal Nick, Me=Me)

N: Oh, hey dude. How are you feeling?

Me: Oh, alright, I suppose.

N: I was going to step outside for a drink and a campfire, what do you think?

Me: Yeah, that could be nice. Wouldn't mind looking around at a different environment or some new textures to hallucinate upon.

N: Sounds good.

We step out upon backyard deck into the cool night air.

N: So, what's been going on?

Me: Hmmm. Not sure.

N: Oh? How so?

Me: (Slight embarrassed laugh) Ah, I'm sorry. I hope it's not rude, I just have no idea who you are. I mean, I'm picking up the cues we're friends and I'm some guy you know, and there's no panic or anything, but forgive me, I just can't seem to place who I am or who you are...haha, I apologize, everything else seems to be in place. I know I took a dose of hallucinogens and there's no anxiety, quite the opposite, it's kind of like a comic version of Total Recall, but it's just not there.

N: Haha, no sweat, that's just where you are.

We have a campfire, I cannot for the life of me remember any detail about my own life, and I'm laughing every now and then because I know I am some guy with amnesia, but none of his anxieties or problems are mine at the moment, and I might as well be walking around a guest in some stranger's house. I open the fridge, and there are several bottles of diet coke.

Me: Boy, I guess this guy likes his diet coke, huh? Holy shit, there's a lot of empties.

N: Dude, it's weird. You drink a lot of that stuff.

Me: Huh.

Nick goes to take a leak, I am hanging out like a stranger waiting in someone's kitchen. I open the dishwasher and start drying dishes. Nick comes back in.

N: What're you doing?

Me: I dunno, I figured the least I could do is this poor bastard's dishes while I'm standing here. He may wind up with a spatula in the freezer or wonder why his crock pot is in the wrong drawer, because I have absolutely no recall of which cupboards hold which cutlery or plates and such.

We are both chuckling a little.

N: If you're game, I was going to go out to the store and get a couple of goodies and a lottery ticket. You can stay in the truck, we'll take yours.

Me: Sure, I'm game. Just following your lead, pal.

Exit house and some big black pickup is in the driveway. I stare at it like Marty McFly after he changes the future and his truck is sitting in the garage waiting for him at the end of Back To The Future. (This is literally a good comparison, those moments in the series where they come back from time travel not knowing what's been changed, but it's still vaguely familiar, except still have no real memory of who I am).

Anyhow, goes on like this for a considerably long time. 2+ hours without any recovery from the specific personal amnesia.

Has anyone else ever had this super high-functioning cognition in terms of thinking and acting completely clearly and reasonably without confusion even in public interactions and exchanges at the corner store, yet sense of personal identity was completely scattered and personal memory and facts about who I was and my own life were suspended in derangement?

I knew my bank card PIN#, not my last name. Knew the drug and dose I took, did not recognize my truck as my own. Knew what a 7-11 was and how to comport myself in purchasing a beverage and a small snack, did not know my job, if I had a wife or children, pets, etc. Truly unique experience to be so mindful of your own amnesia. I think it must have been close to what brain damaged or concussed people feel without the distress of injury or fearful circumstances since I still possessed the knowledge that I had taken 56mg of 4-AcO-DMT at some point and that these were the temporary effects. I could have played trivial pursuit or a game of cards if you'd have asked me. Just couldn't wrap my head around how I could have recovered my senses so much in almost every aspect of normal cognition, but had this super-specific "dead zone".

That's enough for now. Would be very curious to hear if people have had these effects or disassociated in this way before, particularly on 4-Ac0-DMT?

-GA

 

[Tranced]

That's really strange. Seems like a really surgical, clean cut ego death.

I feel like the story is unfinished though. I'm intrigued to know if you can remember the point at which you remembered who you were, and how that came about. Preferably in a continuation of the same narrative.

 

[GreatArc]

Resisting the urge to go too far with it, describing a trip is much like describing a dream; without a little word economy and something for the listener to key in on, it is like watching flies f**k.

Not a great deal more occurred, returned from the store and repaired to the campfire. My neighbour, who could be a character on Trailer Park boys (I'm in a small town in rural Canada), stuck his head over the fence to join us at the fire and raid our cooler and unabashedly take a leak on my newly coifed lawn as if it were perfectly unremarkable. Strangely, I recognized him as a neighbour and knew his name.

Sat quietly listening to my neighbour and my friend chat back and forth about some inane stereotypically Canadian nonsense (literally the kind of stuff you'd think of in a satire, but we closely resemble the stereotypes: hockey, how my yard was lookin', his yard, a new beer he'd tried, how he'd have re-fibreglassed the crack in my canoe differently, how I was descended from godless savages that were worse than his drunken pagan ancestors, the shortcomings of my race, religion and heritage etc. Y'know, guy stuff.)

Anyhow, throughout it all, I am just astounded that surely by this point, after 4+ hours, I should have recovered some vague semblance of personal details. That I should at least be able to see the edges come into view and be able to make a few distinctions about what was and was not true (was I working the next day? what did I do? etc.). Eerily, I couldn't make it out, and I was pretty sensitive to staying in a good anxiety-free headspace and just kept thinking there's no need to force it or focus on it or frustrate myself. I was taking a million cues from what was happening around me and the conversation between these two maniacs, I was safe and didn't need to pretend I wasn't on drugs, and just chuckling a little, enjoying the simple luxury and comfort of a summer night campfire.

The desire to sleep prevailed before I recovered my senses, however, so there was no point of return and was not aware of reconstructing the missing reality until I woke up in a perfectly ordinary headspace.

Thanks for the interest. If it wasn't terribly interesting, at least hope it was worth a chuckle.

(Absolutely had the sensation of a hokey body-swap film like Freaky Friday, or some split-personality flick like Memento, or Total Recall. (Only instead of being a hunted secret agent sleeping with young Sharon Stone and battling my way to an alien reactor beneath Mars, I was some suburban hoser wearing crocs and an undershirt farting into a folding chair by the campfire.)

EDIT: Ironically, this was the first time I have ever tripped around someone else. And the first time humour and absurdity ever entered into a trip. Generally, I enjoy the act of scattering the ego, walking around in that for a while, the small epiphanies forming into chains of larger truths, interacting with an alien intelligence and realizing it is your own brain looking at itself through new eyes and organs you almost never use. It is a very meaningful and intellectual exercise, the world's most wonderful puzzle, and I take it very seriously in the sense that I really want to come away having learned or touched something beautiful and mysterious. This trip was like a Bugs Bunny cartoon where I got hit on the head with an anvil and thought I was shopping for oranges.

 

[pupnik]

your perceptions of familiar things were so changed that associations could not be found.
things were altered and no longer matched what was in memory,
therefore the memories would not be triggered, which is almost the same as not having memory.
however
in any situation you could easily respond to questions directly and simply.
for example the pin for your bank card. simply done as a reflex.
your response to empty the dishwasher. same as usual something about a signal from that dishwasher got through.
pure reflexes from simple cues.
but all the amazing stuff, in a different reality

 

[mr peabody]

1.) Tolerance. Where do it come from? Is more the drug or personal biology?

IMO, personal biology. Some people have a MUCH lower tolerance to psychedelics than others. For example, everyone you're with is taking 3-4 tabs (or grams of mushrooms) and having
a great time, and you find you can only safely handle 1/4 of that. This is PERFECTLY NORMAL.

Don't let others push you into taking more than you're sure you can handle comfortably. This depends totally on the strength of the batch, so start off with a small dose to get a feel for
the strength of the batch, first.

-----

A common oral dose of 4-Acetoxy-DMT is between 10 and 25 mg. Several reports describe doses of 25-30 mg as very strong.

-Erowid

 

[iamthetalker]

What a bizarre experience! Can't say I've ever experienced anything like it, but thanks for sharing. The dishwasher scene really cracked me up; you must have been quite thankful to yourself the next day lol. I never want to do anything productive while tripping.

 

[PsychaStevic]

Great report, sounds like partial ego loss? Kinda crazy how you were able to retain certain things while in that headspace

 

[GreatArc]

In response to Mr. Peabody, I am 6'3 and weigh 270lbs, so It'd be a 30mg dose to a 150lb dude. Plus, I want to swing for the fences in terms of effect. It's not just a change of scenery for me with a few epiphanies thrown in, it's a change of heart. I want to step into an alien brain state and understand why primitive man stared into fire at the dawn of time, or why chimpanzees will meditate upon their own reflection in a pool of water. I can't believe it's possible to actually change your brain, and for a few brief hours, actually become someone else! Scatter the senses like shaking up a bottle of salas dressing as hard as you can, and watch the layers of perception and reality reform until your brain figures out how to be you again. I am of the opinion, that there is nothing fearful about high doses, at least of benign substances, except what you bring with it.

I do appreciate the mention of safe usage though, and checking in upon me with dosage information. I appreciate that it comes from a good place of concern and harm reduction. I respect these drugs very much, but I also understand that I have what seems like the right kind of mind to best explore psychedelics. I had a lot of concern my anxieties and attitude might be the perfect recipe for bad trips, but so far have proved the opposite. I am endlessly fascinated by ego death, breakthrough, epiphany, true rebirth (even for a couple of hours), and having discovered the gateway to something truly special and beautiful.