Sex Changes Everything

[Sticky Green]

Or does it?

I recently heard this line from a girl I have been seeing. She said she is a bit shy and felt we were too new, though she had no issue sleeping together for a couple nights straight and grinding each other to death. On the 3rd night we ended up having sex and it was just alright. There were several reasons why we couldn't really let go, none of which had to do with lack of desire for or intimacy problems with the other (it was noise, space limitation, etc).

Anyway, here we are today and I feel the same. I treat her the same as yesterday and don't see her differently at all. So for those of you out there who believe that sex changes everything, what is your take on why this is true? Is it generally speaking more of a female thing?

 

[Mona Lisa]

It completely changes the dynamics of a relationship. I don't honestly believe it's possible to remain FRIENDS after having sex. There can still be friendliness but it just changes things, (at least that's been my experience ). I regret that I gave into temptation and slept with a long-term friend; it ultimately destroyed our friendship.

He lost respect for me. I felt vulnerable and cheapened. I wish I'd shown more restraint.

 

[pofacedhoe]

yeah that having sex with your friends thing is that it does change things BUT if you dont see them for 6 months and then dont have sex with them after that it can go back to normal. its about the lack of boundaries.

 

[llama112]

It really depends on the relationship and the two people involved.

In your situation, I don't get how it would change anything. Two people are seeing each other. They have sex. That's what a lot of people do when they are seeing each other.

 

[Waffle Sock]

Sex changes.....

 

[Br1ngTh3Ra1n]

It changes the way you look at her.. Every time you look at her from now her forth, whether you liie it or not, you will a have an extremely small flashback of that experience..

 

[bunnyrabbitz]

It completely changes the dynamics of a relationship. I don't honestly believe it's possible to remain FRIENDS after having sex. There can still be friendliness but it just changes things, (at least that's been my experience ). I regret that I gave into temptation and slept with a long-term friend; it ultimately destroyed our friendship.

He lost respect for me. I felt vulnerable and cheapened. I wish I'd shown more restraint.

Ludicrous.

It has no impact other than increasing the quality of life. The only reason it has an impact for some is society gets that idea in your head that it's a big deal.

 

[Waffle Sock]

Ludicrous.

It has no impact other than increasing the quality of life. The only reason it has an impact for some is society gets that idea in your head that it's a big deal.

I agree with this. This ideal is present in a lot of film/TV, which ultimately sways people in favor of it.

 

[samnslumberland]

Ludicrous.

It has no impact other than increasing the quality of life. The only reason it has an impact for some is society gets that idea in your head that it's a big deal.

This. One of my close friends lost her virginity to her best friend whom she grew up with (and attended a private Catholic school with) and they still remain best friends to this day. They're both friends with each other's significant others and openly speak about their sexual experience together with no awkwardness. I think the reason that they've remained so close and are so open about it is because they never made a big deal about it. They simply had sex because my friend wanted to lose her virginity and "offered it" to her best friend. Simple as that.

 

[tennant90]

Depends on what you both want really.

I have had sex with a long term friend. I initiated it the first time and she the second time. We understood before it happened that we would remain friends and we have. I saw her last week after a year (I moved, she had a baby. No its not mine )

So mainly it does need to be somethin that you both want. You have to consider the strength of the relationship and where its going. Sex probably won't change that. Only the both of you talking about it can.

 

[VanessKnapp]

Or does it?

I recently heard this line from a girl I have been seeing. She said she is a bit shy and felt we were too new, though she had no issue sleeping together for a couple nights straight and grinding each other to death. On the 3rd night we ended up having sex and it was just alright. There were several reasons why we couldn't really let go, none of which had to do with lack of desire for or intimacy problems with the other (it was noise, space limitation, etc).

Anyway, here we are today and I feel the same. I treat her the same as yesterday and don't see her differently at all. So for those of you out there who believe that sex changes everything, what is your take on why this is true? Is it generally speaking more of a female thing?

Its awesome feeling to have sex with a men, it is really change all things in your relationship . After having sex the bounding between couples get more strong and they have enjoying their life with each other. I am agree with you, it is true generally females are think like this but according to me it is a common thing for both males and females.

 

[baggerr]

The Harry Met Sally Rule..... Men & women cant be friends because the sex gets in the way

 

[mabzie55]

It completely changes the dynamics of a relationship.

This.

Also, it's impossible to be truly intimate with someone without having sex, so it obviously changes things.

Sex is a religious experience of sorts. (Carl Jung wrote some really interesting stuff about that.)

After going through that experience, it has a profound effect on your psychology in regards to that person.
Each gender has their own specific reaction to this experience, but the net effect it the same for both.

Men on average seem to deny this more than women, but that doesn't make it less real.

Anyway, yes, it definitely changes things.
In a positive way-- unless you have no intention of being with that person... In that case it would be negative I suppose.