ICan'tThinkOfOne
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2016
- Messages
- 4
i don't know if this is in the right forum, so please move it if it isn't.
I think the most important paragraph is the last one if you don't want to read it all.
I thought that I had some manic depressive tendencies throughout high school, just if i think back on it. i'm just going to tell you the whole story, starting in college. Freshman year, i got extremely drunk 2-7 times a week where i was far beyond blacked out and i usually just passed out wherever i was and puked all over myself and pissed myself. This happened 50-75 times. Then over the summer, i got in a really bad wreck while drunk where i was in the hospital several months.
Then i was prescribed dexedrine, which made me extremely happy for a couple months, and i was sleeping roughly 4.5 hours a night, masturbating about 3 times a day, whereas i masturbate around twice a week now. That winter i used cocaine about 6 times. Near the end though, I entered a really deep depression lasting several months and it felt like i had really high tolerance to dexedrine. Then a couple months later, it felt like my tolerance just disappeared and i went back to feeling really happy.
Recently, I've been using a lot more. it's been switching every couple of weeks from me feeling the come up, but i don't even notice the come down. I feel extremely manic afterwards and can't sleep much and feel extremely happy, just needing to do everything, mostly exercise. i have to use a lot of klonopin. Then the other half of the time, I feel the comedown very hard, getting extremely anxious and getting some anhedonia, where i just can't find joy in anything and i mostly just lay around. I just can't find any point in living, whereas when i'm feeling more manic i never even think about the point of life, I just kind of take it for granted that i am alive. I have found it most likely that I have manic depression, but I want to know your all's opinions before i see a doctor and probably lose my dexedrine prescription. What's wrong with me?
I think the most important paragraph is the last one if you don't want to read it all.
I thought that I had some manic depressive tendencies throughout high school, just if i think back on it. i'm just going to tell you the whole story, starting in college. Freshman year, i got extremely drunk 2-7 times a week where i was far beyond blacked out and i usually just passed out wherever i was and puked all over myself and pissed myself. This happened 50-75 times. Then over the summer, i got in a really bad wreck while drunk where i was in the hospital several months.
Then i was prescribed dexedrine, which made me extremely happy for a couple months, and i was sleeping roughly 4.5 hours a night, masturbating about 3 times a day, whereas i masturbate around twice a week now. That winter i used cocaine about 6 times. Near the end though, I entered a really deep depression lasting several months and it felt like i had really high tolerance to dexedrine. Then a couple months later, it felt like my tolerance just disappeared and i went back to feeling really happy.
Recently, I've been using a lot more. it's been switching every couple of weeks from me feeling the come up, but i don't even notice the come down. I feel extremely manic afterwards and can't sleep much and feel extremely happy, just needing to do everything, mostly exercise. i have to use a lot of klonopin. Then the other half of the time, I feel the comedown very hard, getting extremely anxious and getting some anhedonia, where i just can't find joy in anything and i mostly just lay around. I just can't find any point in living, whereas when i'm feeling more manic i never even think about the point of life, I just kind of take it for granted that i am alive. I have found it most likely that I have manic depression, but I want to know your all's opinions before i see a doctor and probably lose my dexedrine prescription. What's wrong with me?
