Opioids opiate obsession

[cat2016]

I have been t-total for 2 years and 5 months and even stopped smoking. The list of drugs i used was weed, pot, speed, MDMA, ketamine, lsd (not often) , 2CB, 2CI (once), cocaine, i smoked heroin once and used a legal high which was meant to replicate heroin but then turned out it contained opiates - Krypton incense in 2009. I was addicted to Ketamine and did so much in less than an hour i think i almost Oded on it, i did over 2 grams or more. I'm female and at the time weighed a lot less.

I quit drugs and drink but have been obsessed with opiates. Its a strange obsession and i've been using 30/500 co-codamol pills which have stolen from a relative (not all of them just some). It started with only one as i managed to get some kind of euphoria high (no idea how) off a low dose one last year. The the next day i took 4, no i've been taking them for the last week and have stollen enough for her to notice so can't take any more.

Its like a hang over i get the next day, even just from 2.

I'm back to sobriety tomorrow. I have not tried cold water extraction but have been researching it, i'd rather not do it.

If i tell a doctor about this will they give me something?

 

[kleinerkiffer]

1. This is not appropriate for OD, OD is for harm reduction questions only
2. I know we are not here to judge, but stealing pain medication from a relative tlwhom is most likely needing it is just pathetic, don't do it!!
3. If you take huge doses and don't want to fuck up your liver do a CWE
4. What do you think the doctor will give you? Free opioids?


And btw, if you're using opioids, you are not drug free

 

[cat2016]

I wasn't sure what section to write this in, i only just discovered this web site. I'm not taking huge doses i'm spacing them out. What i mean was how often I'm taking them. I am not stealing all of them just some and she knows now so can't take any more, i know what you're saying. I have no idea what a doctor could give me, thats why i asked. I have only just fucked up my sobriety in the last 2 weeks.

 

[kleinerkiffer]

Why do you feel the need to take something, is it just pure boredom or more like depression?
If it's depression, maybe try an antidepressant or better do a therapy.
If it's just boredom, trust me, you don't want to go down the road of opioid addiction, just because you have nothing better to do.
Maybe try something like jogging, it'll release endorphins and is way healthier.

 

[cat2016]

I need to have a long think about why. Before i started taking these pills i tried to find some kind of drugs counselling here but without luck. Its a niggling obsession that i can't work out. Jogging does sound like a good idea for endorphins and maybe need some 5htp vitamins or something.

 

[SS373dOH]

Depends on what country you're from..? In america they might put you on subonxone, however you're on such a weak opiate, that you're better off detoxing from that.

Also do you have any medical conditions that would warrant a 'script? Other than "dependency".. For instance, panic attacks, anxiety?




-hs

 

[cjh1221]

Your obsession is a result of Addiction. Simply being clean for 2 years prior to this run did not cure or help the reasons for your drug use and addiction. You need to talk to someone. You may get a doctor to give you Suboxone but if you aren't physically dependent, (which I HIGHLY doubt you are), then that would be like jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. Taking Suboxone, or any type of replacement therapy would jack up your tolerance to ungodly levels, make you physically dependent (which you very likely aren't, yet), and put a black mark in your medical charts that will follow you wherever you go, forever.

I'm going to venture a few guesses.

1. You WILL steal and take more of your relative's pills, you are an addict, addict behavior is highly predictable.
2. Your sudden obsession over opiates/oids is because you spotted them, or knew of them in some way, and it wiggled its way into your addict brain. As long as they are within your reach, or until they are gone, your mind will always be 1/2 focused on them.
3. Your obsession will not stop once they are gone. You will wish, fantasize, and even scheme to get more, until you finally break down and find some, any way you can, and they will become a part of you.

You need to stop this before it has a chance to grow any further. The seed has been planted. It's sprouting and soon will be a weed-vine that will choke out your reason, sense of right and wrong, and your willpower.

If I were you, I would ask for a referral to a counselor so you can sort out the reasons behind your use and addictive nature. You can't cure a disease by covering up the symptoms, you have to ACTUALLY cure the disorder, or it will never go away. Addiction is a brain disorder. It will always be lying dormant, waiting for the right conditions to flare up and turn you into a full-blown junkie. It has happened to so many people, all walks of life, so quickly they didn't even realize what was happening to them, until it was too late. Get some therapy, not drugs. Cure your disorder, don't cover-up the symptoms.

Read this: http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/665970-Personal-Accounts-of-Addiction-What-s-Your-Story
or this: http://www.bluelight.org/vb/archive/index.php/t-634920.html
or this http://www.bluelight.org/vb/forums/89-Bluelight-Shrine
and then decide what path you should take.

(I know they do not all pertain to opiates/oids, but neither does your drug-use history.

NAMASTE

 

[Opiatehell85]

Hey cat, my advice is to just stop taking them now. You're only a week into it so it shouldn't even be that hard. Take it from someone who battled with opiates for three years, I'm female too and also used to get them from relatives aswell as my gp and online, although I didn't steal them... Stop now before u get yourself into a mess. They can pull you under their spell quicker than you can ever imagine. Good luck xx