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Mental Health Not sure if Lexapro is helping or hurting me anymore

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betterdays4all

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Joined
Dec 26, 2016
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I definitely have looked and functioned healthier on Lexapro my last year of law school and my last job which was summer internship in pretty big place, but haven't had success in my job search since because I may come off overly confident or aggressive (hint at bipolar disorder), but when I treated myself for Bipolar and not ADHD, I noticed very little relief and felt like I was functioning at 10% mentally. Lost my ex-gf and never went back to ADHD meds and that's exactly what I needed to get re-focused for this bar exam.

I failed twice before, first time on Adderall XR 25 mg with Lexapro 10 mg and the second time with Adderall IR 10 mg and Lexapro 10 mg/Klonopin 2 mg and scored better second time but think klonopin is what hurt me and suppressed all my emotions (or helped me make better decisions, but i'd like to think benzo didn't work well) hence why we broke up.

I was on Dexedrine Spansules at one point alone which was perfect, but not for studying purposes just ADHD. I'm going to try to quit Lexapro 10 mg again because I think there is a personable aspect I get back off of Lexapro and I got a toxic broken home I live in that is preventing me from moving out on my own basically.

Any suggestions? Only thing that I find odd is I find myself questioning my sexuality on lexapro constantly yet I've only slept with women throughout my life, but it could all be circumstantial since I finished class in 2015 and been trying to pass the bar exam on meds ever since.
 
starting_over said:
If your home life is lousy, why can't you move out?

And have you seen a professional for bipolar and adhd? From what I read, it looks like you have self-diagnosed?

Some guys are bisexual, others are in the closet... hard to say really.

edit: http://bluelight.org/vb/threads/813...y-to-go-with-Adderall-diagnosed-BP-2-and-ADHD
Click to expand...

I don't desire men though, although I can point out when a guy is attractive. I use to sleep with so many women, until I started Lexapro and got comfortable on it thinking I was gay because my sex drive was wierd and so was I, well that ex-gf I was with was doing stuff and it made me numb to it so I stayed on it thinking it was my anxiety and she ended up leaving me when I failed last year and recently reached out but keeping her at a distance right now until I know. The odd thing is I do better on my studying on Lexapro and it seems to be only reason I stayed on it because off of it, I don't score as high on exams unless it's just been that long.

Clonzepam put me to sleep and made me too numb and the Lexapro messes with my sex drive too much. My new PCP prescribed Inderal (beta blocker) but I don't want to take it with stims. Any other anxiety alternative here? I just felt that benzo was bad news for me. I got to see my new PCP again before he writes any stimulant because he questions ADHD and thinks it's just bipolar, but I think the ex and the lexapro may have messed me up, yet I seem dependent on lexapro still. FML, thanks for trying to help!
 
betterdays4all said:
I don't desire men though, although I can point out when a guy is attractive. I use to sleep with so many women, until I started Lexapro and got comfortable on it thinking I was gay because my sex drive was wierd and so was I, well that ex-gf I was with was doing stuff and it made me numb to it so I stayed on it thinking it was my anxiety and she ended up leaving me when I failed last year and recently reached out but keeping her at a distance right now until I know. The odd thing is I do better on my studying on Lexapro and it seems to be only reason I stayed on it because off of it, I don't score as high on exams unless it's just been that long.

Clonzepam put me to sleep and made me too numb and the Lexapro messes with my sex drive too much. My new PCP prescribed Inderal (beta blocker) but I don't want to take it with stims. Any other anxiety alternative here? I just felt that benzo was bad news for me. I got to see my new PCP again before he writes any stimulant because he questions ADHD and thinks it's just bipolar, but I think the ex and the lexapro may have messed me up, yet I seem dependent on lexapro still. FML, thanks for trying to help!
Click to expand...

Time and time again you will see that exercise + CBT / mindfulness / meditation is suggested on this forum for anxiety, depression, or general well-being... because it works and it's free.
It's helped me tremendously, and there are some great resources posted here:

http://bluelight.org/vb/threads/811238-SL-Directory-(lots-of-amazing-info-inside)


If you get off the lexapro I suppose you could tackle the sex drive / sexual orientation issue.

Inderal flared up my acid reflux so I had to stop taking it.

I guess first off just see what your PCP says at your next appointment re: ADHD
 
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