Need advice, dont know what to do anymore

[vGeckz]

Hey guys so im 22 and me and my girlfriend used to have sex everyday, we have been together for almsot 2 years and it was going good, the last couple of months havent been so good in the bedroom, She is never in the mood anymore and hardly ever wants to have sex, we probably have sex maybe once or twice a week if im lucky, it just makes me feel very uncomfortable and makes me feel like im not attractive to her anymore, when we do have sex she always wants me to go down on her so i do, but as soon as i ask for it in return she just replys with yuck you know i dont do that thats disgusting, It sucks because all my mates get BJs and their always talking about how good it is and asking me how much i like it so i have to lie and say she does it, I just dont knoe what to do i would really like some help here.

Thanks

 

[Cogari]

Have an honest conversation with her man. Say what you've said here, that you feel uncomfortable and unattractive. You're used to a certain rhythm, ask her what's changed and hopefully that leads to a discussion. I'd say firmly that it's unfair to be going down on her if she won't do the same for you, say the truth, that you do it for her so isn't it fair to be equal with your behaviour? That said, if she really is averse to it then it isn't the end of the world. Sex and relationships doesn't just come down to one thing, and you shouldn't lie about it, it doesn't impress anyone and the lie makes you feel bad, so there's no need for it.

Have an honest talk with her, and you'll get one of two results: Either you come to an understanding, she's fair and learns how you feel and you work it out, or she'll be dismissive. If she's dismissive, then fuck her off man. Don't make the mistake of doing the heavy lifting in a one way relationship. You must be honest about your concerns, because that honesty lets her know how you feel without any room for doubt, and it gets you out of the worry and into the solution. If she talks with no concern for you or just shrugs it off, then that's a clear signal that she doesn't give a shit about you, and as a person you deserve to be with someone who does appreciate you. And again, don't bow down to peer pressure man. Lad talk is just sharing, and I'm sure you have things to say without lying. Don't get wound up because of what's around you, just face the issue, and you'll know in your gut what the solution is. (y)

 

[JaredTheGhost]

Cogari, that was perfect and couldn't be written any better. VGeckz, listen to Cogari's advice, because it's valuable knowledge that you should always remember and utilize in the future.

 

[Qzly7r]

I'm having the exact same problem but with my boyfriend. I have a high libido and I'm always up for it and I don't mind anymore when he's not up for it... However, I hate it when he expects/wants me to give him head and I do it withoutquestion, however he won't even bother going down there or fingering me even a little bit. If I tell him that I want my tits sucked, he'll do it but he'll do it in a way as if he can't be asked to actually do it and it puts me the fuck off.

 

[pofacedhoe]

if your partner does not want to do things to you they expect you to do to them you have no-one to blame but yourself for tolerating this behaviour in the first place.

i would not be having it myself.

once the precedent is set you are going to find it hard to act like you can put your foot down...

 

[zephyr]

I dont particularly like guys going down on me and like giving head and dont want the guy to reciprocate.

Oral sex isnt gross. Some aspects just dont turn everyone on equally. If the guy really just wants head is it because he wants to brag to his friends or really wants it enough to have a reluctant partner doing it? Maybe there is a hygiene issue? Maybe shes just bored with the sex routine?

 

[xdressingdonna]

If she doesn't want sex with you or won't have oral sex with you, she's not that into you anymore. Time to start looking for someone who is.