Venting My mental pain isnt worse than my physical pain

[MuertaMan]

I hear that line tossed around alot online and sometimes in therapy and Im just gonna go ahead and say I think its completely untrue. I find it kind of insulting actually because I have been anxious and depressed my whole life and I would kill to go back to when I didn't have a chronic physical pain that pretty much ruins any enjoyment I could wring out of life. I still try to do the things that used to make me happy and while I still do them its always stained by the way I feel. I find this statement of mental pain being worse is usually parroted by people whos haven't experienced a physical disease THAT DOESN'T GO AWAY I think they are equating it to normal pain and what most people experience which is, I hurt myself or got sick but after some rest it gets better with time and heals. In that regard I would say its true because you know its only temporary and theres light at the end of the tunnel where as emotional issues have staying power and must be worked through or in some cases medication is required. But when you get ill/hurt (especially if you don't know how or what caused it) it starts out that way and you are just waiting for it to pass but for some reason it doesn't and then day after day your hope is slowly dashed and it gets worse and worse and after so many appts and specialists you one day realize no matter what you will not get better I dont think any type of emotional pain can compare to that.

Its almost impossible to accept your new reality and move on and not feel like you are constantly mourning your old life. A shitty byproduct of all this too is the loneliness and isolation, its made me bitter and have a bit of hatred for healthy people who are laughing and enjoying life in front of you even though they did nothing wrong, all you want is to "join in on the reindeer games" of life but you are an outcast because either you isolate yourself or friends who used to call you end up stopping because pain makes you flaky. Just because you are having a "good pain day" today and you make plans for tomorrow based on how your feeling today doesn't mean you will wake up feeling thatgood the next day so you feel too shitty and have to cancel. The worst part is no one can help you, all they can do is offer platitudes that end up pissing you off (I know they mean well not their fault) because you've heard it all before and know its not reality.

 

[Lil'LinaptkSix]

Physical pain is tolerable most times. We can build a tolerance for it (ime) and usually are up and running in a few days/weeks/months but emotional/mind "pain" - if not tended to - can leave one crippled for life. It seems to grow insidiously if unchecked and spreads.
This has been my experience.
My opinion, though?
Like comparing apples to oranges. Two totally different things going on even though they are both considered fruit....

 

[Snafu in the Void]

This is an entirely subjective topic. Everyone experiences pain differently as well.

For example, women have up to 9x the physical pain tolerance than men do, probably due to child birth and evolution. Some people handle mental pain better than others for various reasons.

I would imagine significantly more people kill themselves due to mental pain compared to physical.

Physical pain can also cause mental pain, and vice versa psychosomatically.

But ultimately, I don't really think you can objectively compare mental vs physical pain.

 

[Foreigner]

The worst physical pain I have been in was way worse than the worst mental pain I have been in, and both were tremendously awful.

I would choose psychological pain over physical pain any day. That's not to say that mental pain can't be excruciating. But for me it's easier to deal with.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

I hear that line tossed around alot online and sometimes in therapy and Im just gonna go ahead and say I think its completely untrue. I find it kind of insulting actually because I have been anxious and depressed my whole life and I would kill to go back to when I didn't have a chronic physical pain that pretty much ruins any enjoyment I could wring out of life. I still try to do the things that used to make me happy and while I still do them its always stained by the way I feel. I find this statement of mental pain being worse is usually parroted by people whos haven't experienced a physical disease THAT DOESN'T GO AWAY I think they are equating it to normal pain and what most people experience which is, I hurt myself or got sick but after some rest it gets better with time and heals. In that regard I would say its true because you know its only temporary and theres light at the end of the tunnel where as emotional issues have staying power and must be worked through or in some cases medication is required. But when you get ill/hurt (especially if you don't know how or what caused it) it starts out that way and you are just waiting for it to pass but for some reason it doesn't and then day after day your hope is slowly dashed and it gets worse and worse and after so many appts and specialists you one day realize no matter what you will not get better I dont think any type of emotional pain can compare to that.

Its almost impossible to accept your new reality and move on and not feel like you are constantly mourning your old life. A shitty byproduct of all this too is the loneliness and isolation, its made me bitter and have a bit of hatred for healthy people who are laughing and enjoying life in front of you even though they did nothing wrong, all you want is to "join in on the reindeer games" of life but you are an outcast because either you isolate yourself or friends who used to call you end up stopping because pain makes you flaky. Just because you are having a "good pain day" today and you make plans for tomorrow based on how your feeling today doesn't mean you will wake up feeling thatgood the next day so you feel too shitty and have to cancel. The worst part is no one can help you, all they can do is offer platitudes that end up pissing you off (I know they mean well not their fault) because you've heard it all before and know its not reality.

I respectfully disagree. I have very severe chronic pain and have THREE conditions that are in the top 10 most painful a person can experience. I also have Borderline Personality Disorder and Psychotic Depression and as agonising as the physical conditions are, the mental pain is way worse.

 

[MuertaMan]

cool story bro

 

[Eligiu]

As someone with severe MH issues which are completely debilitating on a daily basis to the extent of being on disability AND suffering from chronic pain as a result of hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome I can assure you each are uniquely shitty.

I have complex post traumatic stress disorder, alongside level 3 autism and a severe problem with dissociation. On a good day by lunch, I can't remember if I had my medication let alone if I ate breakfast.

If you have had depression and anxiety your whole life, you have had depression and anxiety. You have not experienced things like psychotic symptoms from bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, or schizoaffective disorder. You have not experienced the interpersonal issues that permeate the issues faced by those with cptsd or know what its like to have a dissociative disorder. Or a personality disorder. Or something like obsessive compulsive disorder.

You cannot compare the suffering here. It's asthenine to do so, you will no doubt become increasingly resentful at those who legitimately point out that you have not experienced the mental suffering that they do in their life because of their unique background (which yes, may be much more severe than you ever experienced hence your misunderstanding of what extremely severe MH issues can be like) and continue to make condescending posts when you are not agreed with.

I suggest that a far more constructive use of your time is connecting with other forum users who struggle in the same way as yourself, or even those whose primary concern is MH issues to advocate for better health support and treatment for any and all people suffering from both physical disability, and disability from a MH condition.

 

[Uknowit4now]

I hear that line tossed around alot online and sometimes in therapy and Im just gonna go ahead and say I think its completely untrue. I find it kind of insulting actually because I have been anxious and depressed my whole life and I would kill to go back to when I didn't have a chronic physical pain that pretty much ruins any enjoyment I could wring out of life. I still try to do the things that used to make me happy and while I still do them its always stained by the way I feel. I find this statement of mental pain being worse is usually parroted by people whos haven't experienced a physical disease THAT DOESN'T GO AWAY I think they are equating it to normal pain and what most people experience which is, I hurt myself or got sick but after some rest it gets better with time and heals. In that regard I would say its true because you know its only temporary and theres light at the end of the tunnel where as emotional issues have staying power and must be worked through or in some cases medication is required. But when you get ill/hurt (especially if you don't know how or what caused it) it starts out that way and you are just waiting for it to pass but for some reason it doesn't and then day after day your hope is slowly dashed and it gets worse and worse and after so many appts and specialists you one day realize no matter what you will not get better I dont think any type of emotional pain can compare to that.

Its almost impossible to accept your new reality and move on and not feel like you are constantly mourning your old life. A shitty byproduct of all this too is the loneliness and isolation, its made me bitter and have a bit of hatred for healthy people who are laughing and enjoying life in front of you even though they did nothing wrong, all you want is to "join in on the reindeer games" of life but you are an outcast because either you isolate yourself or friends who used to call you end up stopping because pain makes you flaky. Just because you are having a "good pain day" today and you make plans for tomorrow based on how your feeling today doesn't mean you will wake up feeling thatgood the next day so you feel too shitty and have to cancel. The worst part is no one can help you, all they can do is offer platitudes that end up pissing you off (I know they mean well not their fault) because you've heard it all before and know its not reality.

Physical pain has "zero" on mental pain 100000% facts i had a bullet in my spine and that pain is .00000000001% of what opiates did to me metally..nothing in this friggen world can compare to the mental anguish that opiates will put you thru.. try doing dope for 30 years like i did and then tell me Physical pain even means "anything" cause it means "squat" compared to mental pain.. Inexperienced people think Physical pain means something haha i say Physical pain is a joke compared to mental pain its a friggen joke!!!!!!!! Dont use opiates they will end up showing you what "mental" pain really is.. and they will take you to hell and you will be tormented beyond comprehension period.. nuff said.

 

[December Flower]

You are gatekeeping feeling miserable. Logic?
Honestly, think about it. You are trying to disallow people to feel "as miserable as you",
only because they suffer from a different kind of pain. Non sequitur.

The only truth to be found here, is that people will always think that their own suffering is somehow worse than other people's suffering. Your pain is, in the confounds of your reality, the worst.

I once had a patient who was forever mentally trapped in a situation back from WWII, when she was 3 years old. She was trapped under the rubble of a bombed house for a day. Well for the last 20 years of her life, as she developed dementia, she was always trapped under the house. She just screamed and screamed all day. Do not underestimate what your mind can do to you.

 

[Snafu in the Void]

Isn't all physical pain technically "mental pain"? In essence, physical pain is also created in the brain, after receiving a nerve signal extraneously.

There is a very rare genetic brain abnormality in which people are unable to feel any pain at all, because their primal brain doesn't produce that response.

Also, physical pain has been proven to be managed or modulated through meditation techniques... same with psychological pain.

In any case it's a question with no real answer. It's like people comparing which type of withdrawal is worse; heroin, benzos, or alcohol... I've noticed people's answers to that question are always based on their own subjective experiences. There is no real answer. Apples and oranges.

In my opinion, mental pain has the potential to create infinitely worse types of "pain", whereas physical pain can truly be horrific, but is rather one dimensional in nature.

I've experienced brief episodes of 11/10 pain, but never true chronic pain. Yet during my worst suicidal and/or psychotic episodes... the mental pain was so far worse I am almost uncomfortable speaking about it. It traumatized me in a lasting way that physical pain never even came close in comparison.

There are mental scars that are created, but aren't so visually or consciously obvious as a physical scar.

 

[Senior Moderator]

I hear that line tossed around alot online and sometimes in therapy and Im just gonna go ahead and say I think its completely untrue. I find it kind of insulting actually because I have been anxious and depressed my whole life and I would kill to go back to when I didn't have a chronic physical pain that pretty much ruins any enjoyment I could wring out of life. I still try to do the things that used to make me happy and while I still do them its always stained by the way I feel. I find this statement of mental pain being worse is usually parroted by people whos haven't experienced a physical disease THAT DOESN'T GO AWAY I think they are equating it to normal pain and what most people experience which is, I hurt myself or got sick but after some rest it gets better with time and heals. In that regard I would say its true because you know its only temporary and theres light at the end of the tunnel where as emotional issues have staying power and must be worked through or in some cases medication is required. But when you get ill/hurt (especially if you don't know how or what caused it) it starts out that way and you are just waiting for it to pass but for some reason it doesn't and then day after day your hope is slowly dashed and it gets worse and worse and after so many appts and specialists you one day realize no matter what you will not get better I dont think any type of emotional pain can compare to that.

Its almost impossible to accept your new reality and move on and not feel like you are constantly mourning your old life. A shitty byproduct of all this too is the loneliness and isolation, its made me bitter and have a bit of hatred for healthy people who are laughing and enjoying life in front of you even though they did nothing wrong, all you want is to "join in on the reindeer games" of life but you are an outcast because either you isolate yourself or friends who used to call you end up stopping because pain makes you flaky. Just because you are having a "good pain day" today and you make plans for tomorrow based on how your feeling today doesn't mean you will wake up feeling thatgood the next day so you feel too shitty and have to cancel. The worst part is no one can help you, all they can do is offer platitudes that end up pissing you off (I know they mean well not their fault) because you've heard it all before and know its not reality.

I am really sorry to hear that you are suffering so much with chronic pain. Do you have a diagnosed condition? If so, let us know (if you feel comfortable doing so of course) because it is likely that there are others on here who have the same condition and you can maybe reach out to them for support.

But just for a little perspective, go have a read of this thread:
https://bluelight.org/xf/threads/co...njections-v-7-0.931597/page-210#post-15874686
The people in the Invega thread experience true, excruciating, completely debilitating mental pain every second of every day for indefinite periods of time. It might show you an example of how mental pain can affect people's lives too.

Isn't all physical pain technically "mental pain"? In essence, physical pain is also created in the brain, after receiving a nerve signal extraneously.

There is a very rare genetic brain abnormality in which people are unable to feel any pain at all, because their primal brain doesn't produce that response.

Also, physical pain has been proven to be managed or modulated through meditation techniques... same with psychological pain.

In any case it's a question with no real answer. It's like people comparing which type of withdrawal is worse; heroin, benzos, or alcohol... I've noticed people's answers to that question are always based on their own subjective experiences. There is no real answer. Apples and oranges.

In my opinion, mental pain has the potential to create infinitely worse types of "pain", whereas physical pain can truly be horrific, but is rather one dimensional in nature.

I've experienced brief episodes of 11/10 pain, but never true chronic pain. Yet during my worst suicidal and/or psychotic episodes... the mental pain was so far worse I am almost uncomfortable speaking about it. It traumatized me in a lasting way that physical pain never even came close in comparison.

There are mental scars that are created, but aren't so visually or consciously obvious as a physical scar.

This, I believe, is the only correct answer.

Pain is pain is pain. Chronic physical pain can and often causes severe mental pain, and severe mental pain can and often does cause physical pain symptoms.

Over the last 17 years that I have been moderating The Dark Side there have been countless threads such as this, trying to compare the two, trying to decide which is worse, people dicksizing about how bad their pain is, but ultimately the question is unanswerable because pain is subjective. You simply cannot delve in to people's brains and conclude that "This person's pain is less than that person's pain".

So yes absolutely we can continue to discuss our varying struggles with pain in this thread. But if anyone belittles anyone else's experience with their pain the thread will be closed.

 

[MuertaMan]

To be clear this post is titled "venting" for a reason, it wasn't intended as some reddit "change my view" thread, Im mentally ill and within the last decade have developed whats only been told to me as an auto immune disease suspected MS but because no lesions showed up on my MRI's they don't want to jump to conclusions just yet. To those who have responded in civil way much appreciated but anyone saying "im gatekeeping" because I had to get something off my chest and thought it would help me better to do it where it can be seen anonymously vs some fucking journal that no one would ever see sorry you are so fucking butthurt over someone elses opinion. Im not coming at this from a place of having only a physical ailment I clearly stated I suffer with mental illness as well, only 6 or so months ago I was in an fucking asylum in chicago with people shitting in hallways and rubbing it all over walls and themselves and screaming and violent "Kill me Kill me Kill me" screaming night and day from one lady and all the horrible scary shit you can think of, I know both angles and I can say for sure that if I was granted one wish of which one I would rather be cured I would say the physical pain without a second thought. Funny how some people take it as a one upping contest when someone vents their feelings on a subject. I know for a fact i'm gonna kill myself over this, Ive had a rope around my neck and pussied out many times in my life but I know one day I will go through with it because I can't imagine going through this alone later in life as an old man, theres just no way I'll be able to hold down a job as it keeps getting worse. Again this was a venting post coming from a place where all I was saying was if I was given the option for only one to get better Id rather my body heal and deal with my mental problems vs being mentally sound in a fucked up body whos immune system is always attacking itself. If anyone gets pissy about that thats their preogative.

 

[kiely]

Yes, and I think any kind of pain is what let's us know that we are still alive.
Prayers for All.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

cool story bro

DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER!?!?!

 

[Senior Moderator]

DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER!?!?!

Let's not indulge his shitty comment please.

 

[Senior Moderator]

To be clear this post is titled "venting" for a reason, it wasn't intended as some reddit "change my view" thread, Im mentally ill and within the last decade have developed whats only been told to me as an auto immune disease suspected MS but because no lesions showed up on my MRI's they don't want to jump to conclusions just yet. To those who have responded in civil way much appreciated but anyone saying "im gatekeeping" because I had to get something off my chest and thought it would help me better to do it where it can be seen anonymously vs some fucking journal that no one would ever see sorry you are so fucking butthurt over someone elses opinion. Im not coming at this from a place of having only a physical ailment I clearly stated I suffer with mental illness as well, only 6 or so months ago I was in an fucking asylum in chicago with people shitting in hallways and rubbing it all over walls and themselves and screaming and violent "Kill me Kill me Kill me" screaming night and day from one lady and all the horrible scary shit you can think of, I know both angles and I can say for sure that if I was granted one wish of which one I would rather be cured I would say the physical pain without a second thought. Funny how some people take it as a one upping contest when someone vents their feelings on a subject. I know for a fact i'm gonna kill myself over this, Ive had a rope around my neck and pussied out many times in my life but I know one day I will go through with it because I can't imagine going through this alone later in life as an old man, theres just no way I'll be able to hold down a job as it keeps getting worse. Again this was a venting post coming from a place where all I was saying was if I was given the option for only one to get better Id rather my body heal and deal with my mental problems vs being mentally sound in a fucked up body whos immune system is always attacking itself. If anyone gets pissy about that thats their preogative.

In that case I have taken the liberty to change the title of your thread to reflect your intentions more clearly, so that people enter the thread with better understanding of where you're coming from.

 

[foodcrisis]

my physical pain causes me mental pain. being disabled and unable to do certain activities causes me mental trouble. it causes me to have depressing dreams.

i'm lucky i can have no pain if i don't do a lot of activities, like i can't lift more than a gallon of water or walk up stairs. i can't play guitar even for a few seconds with out getting head aches and pins in my body afterwards. i never play despite it used to be my favorite thing. i get over it by listening to a lot of music. i've even recorded a lot of my own music before i was hurt and some while i was hurt and i always get put in a good mood by listening to that. it gets to the point where i realize i can't record my music and do much of a better job, so it's not even worth me playing cause i'd often like to play styles of music with out putting effort into it, and it just seems kind of stupid to me at this point and annoying to people around me, althrough it was my favorite form of meditation. i used to get by doing yoga and that helped with a lot of mental trouble. if i do a lot of yoga poses now i will get pins and needles all over my body with a headache... i think there are people with pain that they can't even avoid though, like i can not do stuff and won't get pain, some people don't have that opportunity and are just in pain. even if it gets worse for me, i'm still going to be in a better place than a lot of people. so i really have no complaints... physical pain totally sucks.. i esspcailly don't like the "pain in the pass" feeling that comes from having a damaged central nervous system. the headaches are scarier, but the pain in the ass feeling is so awkward. i imagine i could feel worse. i only have one herniated disk. but i have a lot of symptoms of nerve damage and got hit by a car that was going pretty fast, so i don't really know exactly what's going on with my body.

 

[t_xeplionhell]

I hear that line tossed around alot online and sometimes in therapy and Im just gonna go ahead and say I think its completely untrue. I find it kind of insulting actually because I have been anxious and depressed my whole life and I would kill to go back to when I didn't have a chronic physical pain that pretty much ruins any enjoyment I could wring out of life. I still try to do the things that used to make me happy and while I still do them its always stained by the way I feel. I find this statement of mental pain being worse is usually parroted by people whos haven't experienced a physical disease THAT DOESN'T GO AWAY I think they are equating it to normal pain and what most people experience which is, I hurt myself or got sick but after some rest it gets better with time and heals. In that regard I would say its true because you know its only temporary and theres light at the end of the tunnel where as emotional issues have staying power and must be worked through or in some cases medication is required. But when you get ill/hurt (especially if you don't know how or what caused it) it starts out that way and you are just waiting for it to pass but for some reason it doesn't and then day after day your hope is slowly dashed and it gets worse and worse and after so many appts and specialists you one day realize no matter what you will not get better I dont think any type of emotional pain can compare to that.

Its almost impossible to accept your new reality and move on and not feel like you are constantly mourning your old life. A shitty byproduct of all this too is the loneliness and isolation, its made me bitter and have a bit of hatred for healthy people who are laughing and enjoying life in front of you even though they did nothing wrong, all you want is to "join in on the reindeer games" of life but you are an outcast because either you isolate yourself or friends who used to call you end up stopping because pain makes you flaky. Just because you are having a "good pain day" today and you make plans for tomorrow based on how your feeling today doesn't mean you will wake up feeling thatgood the next day so you feel too shitty and have to cancel. The worst part is no one can help you, all they can do is offer platitudes that end up pissing you off (I know they mean well not their fault) because you've heard it all before and know its not reality.

This might be useful for you to know:

SSRI antidepressants work by lowering "highs and lows" in mood, placing you in a constant state with no much variance or change, almost like mood stabilizers.
How SSRI's work:
- it decreases amount of specific receptors while also causing upregulation, which in result makes every mood seem almost the same
- less receptors decrease range/variance your synapses can produce, mostly because chemical synapses are analogous.