Could be you just need to initiate more. Easiest solution is always worth a shot.
But it needs to come from deep inside, not as a tack-on. Try to make everyday life more playful. Let her know something is rising within you. Let her understand you have changed. Prove to her that you are attractive. This stuff can't be negotiated. Humans are lazy and we try to solve things just by talking differently about them, and sometimes it kinda works, but that kind of BS doesn't fool a woman's sexual instinct.
Generally women like men to show initiative and if they find their men unattractive it's most often because of a lack of manliness and initiative. Very rarely it's caused by excessive approaching, even though excessive approaching of a dysfunctional sort can exacerbate the issue. Rather, the approach tends to be too weak. Something like a demand or command is more appropriate than a "suggestion" of sex.
Don't disrespect her by over-respecting her current stated preferences. It is a trap of stagnation, an excuse for the status quo. Trust her ability to flow with life. That is female strength.
Think about what she wants and how to be what she wants... But throw all feminism out the window. What she wants you to be is no different from what you should want to be.
Do you have a jargon, humor, rapport between you?
