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My Friend OD'd.

M

meth444

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 19, 2014
Messages
187
I don't know where to put this. I've got about 3 years clean now. My battle buddy in Meth addiction, who was still using, apparently upgraded his addiction to Heroin and OD'd on my bathroom floor about 2 hours ago. I had no clue he was using heroin. It hurts. My Father passed in February. Then Captain Heroin. Even when i found the rig i didn't think black. He had lost his beloved dog, Dog, and his Fiancee, Tammy within the last 6 months. He always looked out for me and I him. He didn't lie, cheat or steal, or even panhandle. He would come to visit, shower, and cook. He brought ribs tonight. He had a 40 hr job and recycled like only a Methamphetamine aficionado could. He didn't live with me because he was still using. I could trust him with anything. I hoped he would clean up, follow my example. He was a loving, giving soul. Gone at 35. This hurts. I understand he was using black to mask the pain of 2/3 of his life dying. I understand he couldn't tell me. I wish he could have told me.
I don't know how to end this.
Use with a friend.
Don't OD and abandon those who love you.
Goodbye, Nate. I love you like a brother.
 
BB, thanks for the support. Last couple of years had a lot of death. Lost friends in Iraq in 2005. Just a heavy load. Crushing. I weep, numb up for a few minutes, weep again. Awful times.
 
I always want to say something but in the end I just stay quiet, feel the pain and hope that it works out for people that are still alive. Now I have written it. My condolences.
 
Once i gave 5 of the 10 that i bad, he was fighting it. I told him he might as well take it, because it'd look better in his pocket than his ass. He wasn't ni softie either. It was a wtf moment. He used the line on me a couple years later
 
Aw man, this is tragic. I'm so sorry this happened to you :(

It's hard to see the big picture when you're using, but all sorts of people suffer if you leave them behind.
 
I am so sorry for your loss and that it happened like that. Sounds like an amazing person. I think you're already processing it in a healthy way. I use things like this to recommit to harm reduction and MH awareness.

<3
 
deficiT said:
Aw man, this is tragic. I'm so sorry this happened to you :(

It's hard to see the big picture when you're using, but all sorts of people suffer if you leave them behind.
Click to expand...

Right on the money. I've got kids, and this has made my commitment to sobriety stronger.
Thanks. Your and all the responses are the support i want and need
 
Snafu of the Forest said:
I am so sorry for your loss and that it happened like that. Sounds like an amazing person. I think you're already processing it in a healthy way. I use things like this to recommit to harm reduction and MH awareness.

<3
Click to expand...
Thank you, Snafu. It's good to hear. I mentioned above, it's made my commitment to sobriety stronger. I had been kicking around an idea to start a mobile needle exchange (i was an IV meth user) so this kind of seals it. MH awareness??
 
So sorry to hear this friend

As you're experienced with bereavement, you'll know fine well that it's a process and that the pain is unavoidable, and I know it's very raw right now...

The tribute that you can pay to your dear friend is to live as well as you possibly can do <3
 
seriously sorry to hear that man, I will always support being honest about being in active addiction with people you’re actually around because they might see OD signs / administer narc if needed. that’s shitty man
 
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