Meth usage (?)

[AureliusNirvana]

Hi, new poster (lol obviously) - I've scouted these forums over many years periodically, though.

This post is regarding "Ice/Meth" usage, that I'm certain some of you should be able to provide some decent advice and perspective/s on. Would appreciate it greatly.


30 year old male and have had intermittent use for the past ~ 2 yrs.

In terms of frequency of use and habit:

- Only acquire ~ 0.125g (usually consistent, decent quality) at a single time for personal use; not for social/study/employment, etc. but for mental stimulation creating and recording music at home. I don't rely on it, but appreciate the headspace and productivity it provides.

- Had some recently this weekend, and my last occasion was ~ 6 weeks ago. Prior to that it was end of last year, and was doing it once every 4-8 weeks.

- Use a glassy and usually pack the bowl 4-6x with a 2-3hr interval period before needing to load the bowl again, till gone. - this is with 0.125g. (To be honest, often struggle to get through a point within 24 hrs - any remains I tend to give away to a friend a few days later). Don't carry on after 24hrs has lapsed.

- I'm still yet to experience any cravings and/or withdrawal during the comedown and proceeding days after use... I know this is always subjected to change * I'm no different to anyone else.


Honestly, it so far seems only opportunistic in my case (I have ease of access, so my will-power / faculties are somewhat knit), but naturally I'm concerned over the coming years if to continue it will be different ("not a matter of if, but when.")

Would you consider my stint (so far) with this substance relatively moderate and "responsible" referring to the above noted? I feel a bit tainted for doing it, stigma.. And for concerns I could be doing some damage, without knowing.

I've never had any substance abuse/addiction issues, I don't plan to either; I'm strongly contemplating abstinence going forward after some thoughtful consideration tonight.

I rarely drink these days (never was a fan of alcohol - only for the odd social events, light sessions), haven't dabbled w/ any party drugs for a close to a year now either, getting too old for it and so is my social circles. Even cannabis I have been giving a breather lately, despite always being my substitute for some relaxing inebriation.


Thanks in advance.

 

[Pattypuffer]

Welcome to bluelight! We're all fighting similar battles here so feel no need to justify your choices. Forget the stigma, the opinions of strangers should be of no consequence just as your actions should be of no consequence to them. Only you can decide if/ when enough is enough and you're the only one that gets to live with those decisions.

I'm a 30 year old female that has been testing the waters with this particular demon for less than a year. I fell in love with its beauty the first time and kept her by my side for a full week, only to discover that in the euphoria I had duped myself into believing the lies... It took weeks to recover from the dehydration and psychosis. After some time passed, I decided to proceed again but this time with caution. (Some of my personal limits are: a 48hr cap and sharing at most a g with at least 1 other person- never by myself).

Since then, I've met her knockoffs and found myself feeling miserable off of more than you described and poisoned off of less. Personally, I find my use so far acceptable, and see it as having been a necessary evil in order to gain understanding and learn the truth about it for myself.

In some ways I'm thankful for having such a wonderful and terrifying first experience and quite enough experiences since that were at best, Meh. Those experiences made the damage I was doing to myself abundantly clear from the start, allowing me to make informed decisions on the matter before a habit could be formed in my naivety. Even so, abstaining completely from future use is not my goal in life (at least not yet).

So, if you seek validation and if you're description of use is accurate, of course I would consider your use to be relatively moderate. Hell it even sounds pretty "responsible" to me (responsible meth use gotta love it!) You are acknowledging that there are risks involved, have set personal boundaries, and have come to a harm reduction site rather than Pookie's playhouse and for that, Bravo....However, I do believe that the only acceptance you really need is your own.

 

[AureliusNirvana]

Welcome to bluelight! We're all fighting similar battles here so feel no need to justify your choices. Forget the stigma, the opinions of strangers should be of no consequence just as your actions should be of no consequence to them. Only you can decide if/ when enough is enough and you're the only one that gets to live with those decisions.

I'm a 30 year old female that has been testing the waters with this particular demon for less than a year. I fell in love with its beauty the first time and kept her by my side for a full week, only to discover that in the euphoria I had duped myself into believing the lies... It took weeks to recover from the dehydration and psychosis. After some time passed, I decided to proceed again but this time with caution. (Some of my personal limits are: a 48hr cap and sharing at most a g with at least 1 other person- never by myself).

Since then, I've met her knockoffs and found myself feeling miserable off of more than you described and poisoned off of less. Personally, I find my use so far acceptable, and see it as having been a necessary evil in order to gain understanding and learn the truth about it for myself.

In some ways I'm thankful for having such a wonderful and terrifying first experience and quite enough experiences since that were at best, Meh. Those experiences made the damage I was doing to myself abundantly clear from the start, allowing me to make informed decisions on the matter before a habit could be formed in my naivety. Even so, abstaining completely from future use is not my goal in life (at least not yet).

So, if you seek validation and if you're description of use is accurate, of course I would consider your use to be relatively moderate. Hell it even sounds pretty "responsible" to me (responsible meth use gotta love it!) You are acknowledging that there are risks involved, have set personal boundaries, and have come to a harm reduction site rather than Pookie's playhouse and for that, Bravo....However, I do believe that the only acceptance you really need is your own.

Appreciate you sharing that. Read it over a few times.

Disposed of all related paraphernalia earlier this evening. Also been recently watching clips by 'CG kid' on YouTube. Resonate with this guy completely regarding his poly-use.

For those interested in his channel (very resourceful and from the heart) - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCacn-Cy4KtIm-dl0iuLHAUA/videos

I've had my fun (and lessons) with several substances during the past 15yrs (half my life..) and seeking consistent and complete sobriety now. I seem to be doing well. Even quit smoking cigarettes nearly a year ago (which subjectively was the most difficult to stop in comparison to everything else.)

... Maybe the occasional shroom trip won't hurt; beautiful teachers.

 

[Pattypuffer]

Appreciate you sharing that. Read it over a few times.

Disposed of all related paraphernalia earlier this evening. Also been recently watching clips by 'CG kid' on YouTube. Resonate with this guy completely regarding his poly-use.

For those interested in his channel (very resourceful and from the heart) - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCacn-Cy4KtIm-dl0iuLHAUA/videos

I've had my fun (and lessons) with several substances during the past 15yrs (half my life..) and seeking consistent and complete sobriety now. I seem to be doing well. Even quit smoking cigarettes nearly a year ago (which subjectively was the most difficult to stop in comparison to everything else.)

... Maybe the occasional shroom trip won't hurt; beautiful teachers.

Hell yeah man sounds like you're on a path you can be proud of. I'll check out your suggested channel. I agree about the occasional trip. I can never find shrooms when I want em but I seem to come across them when I need 'em. Imo they're best with a clear head and clean system. They always seem to help me gain perspective during transitional periods when I'm struggling to let go and move forward. Best of luck to you.