Stimulants Meth, or not meth, that is the question

[Katiekatkat]

hello,

Please don't judge, I feel like a super lame noob, even though I'm really not. I was a heavy meth user on and off since I was a freshmen in high school (I am now 35). I eventually became an IV user, you know how it goes, living on the street and that life.

Anyways, I cleaned up my life and I had been sober for 3 years and even graduated from college and now getting a bachelors degree. Long story short, I relapsed in mid may, quarantine pushed me to want to...but it was still my choice.
Anyways...
The first bag of meth I got was just like I remembered it, but I used very small amounts, slamming and snorting. Happy, not hungry, energetic, creative, helped me get all As on my finals, all good. Not too bad of a come down even.

The next 3 bags have given me a totally different experience, that I have NEVER felt, even out of all the years I was a heavy user. And I NEED to figure out if it's me or wtf this stuff is.


So, after the first fire bag, I got a 2nd. I slammed it and I felt nothing. I thought maybe it was weak and my tolerance might be a little higher now, i did a little more. It gave me and instant panic attack and all the weird scary feelings you think about when having a classic panic attack.
Flushed that shit and told my friend what happened.

Got a 3rd bag from someone else. Snorted around 3 times throughout the day. I had a little more energy and a little less appetite but it still was nothing like the first bag. And by the evening I started having the worst panic attack I've ever had in my life.

Out of the years and years of doing shit (being a heavy user). All kinds of pills, benzos, black, cokebenzoyl, mxing many things, and heavy slamming... i have never had this panic attack thing happen. The only time I got a panic attack was during a time I was sober in my early 20's and started using xanax in reponse to having panic attacks. and that's how I recognized the feeling of having a panic attack and not true death.
Flushed that bag.

I told my homie what happened and said not to contact me unless he found something like the first bag. A week and a half goes by and he claims he found fire and that he would put his whole rep on it.

Get the bag, this time I snort a little and try to taste it, and smoke it.
Almost felt like i could have a other panic attack. Tired, but couldn't sleep, could eat if I wanted, not very energetic, but shaky.
I tried the bleach test and it seems like a pass... told my friend again, that I was not feeling it. He keeps insisting that it was good for him but that he feels bad I'm still having a bad reaction.


I need another opinion. I know I should have just let it go, but I need to try to figure out why this is happening. Like I said, I have never ever experienced this from any of the drugs I've done over the years and it makes me feel like a total noob or crazy person..

Has anyone else had a similar experience and might know why?

Is it me? Is my body just depleted super fast and racting bad? Am I sensitive to a new kind of cut that's popular now?

Or is it more likely fake or a bad cut of something I've never had before, and what could it be???


Thanks for reading

 

[falsifiedhypothesi]

There seems to be a lot of reports like yours on here. So far everyone has asked the same question, "what is this shit?"

Unfortunately no one has an answer. The only way to know for certain is a lab test and I haven't seen anyone posting lab results.

Whether it's you or bad meth you should stop. I'm not judging you in the slightest but if it's your brain chemistry then better meth won't solve this issue. If it's bad meth then you are going to run an extremely high risk of this happening again and again due to shit meth being so prolific.

We can't tell you what's it's your meth over the internet, if you want to know what exactly is in this shit then you'll have to send it to a lab yourself. If you do please post the results.

Good luck, stay safe
Oh, and welcome to Bluelight

 

[Katiekatkat]

There seems to be a lot of reports like yours on here. So far everyone has asked the same question, "what is this shit?"

Unfortunately no one has an answer. The only way to know for certain is a lab test and I haven't seen anyone posting lab results.

Whether it's you or bad meth you should stop. I'm not judging you in the slightest but if it's your brain chemistry then better meth won't solve this issue. If it's bad meth then you are going to run an extremely high risk of this happening again and again due to shit meth being so prolific.

We can't tell you what's it's your meth over the internet, if you want to know what exactly is in this shit then you'll have to send it to a lab yourself. If you do please post the results.

Good luck, stay safe
Oh, and welcome to Bluelight

Thanks for the welcome and I appreciate your response.

I understand you can't tell, just looking for ideas and maybe others who have had a similar experience. Especially because I've been out of the loop for a long time and have never had this happen before..

I know replase is not something to aim for...I've lived that way most of my life. But this is where I am now and what I did. I got rid of each "bad" bag, except this last one, i'm still smoking a little for now. It's confusing when each of the sources are saying it's good for them...

My friend did say meth is hard to find right now because of covid...

Thanks

 

[Joey]

This is only the beginning. I know you said you used around for many years, from freshman year til early 30s, and didn't have the panic attacks. I think though since it's started, having that experience now you might be triggered into more attacks if you smoke. Just speaking from personal experience with it and other stuff too.

I used to green out so often at a point with pot like 14/15 it's never been the same. I still smoked here and there, like often at points and months off whenever, but not a high dose usually..

26 I got a medical card cause I found out high CBD strains were better for me. Smoked a bunch to take he edge off all the meth I was on, which was in fact driving me nuts.

Meth was so fucked up for me back then. Total psycho in the end. I "quit" just shy of turning 27. I'd picked up a few times over the next year though, and I'd go into a really bad state almost every time. The few little periods I'd use around last summer and fall t wasnt too bad. I didn't get too deep though, yet.

I picked up again in a really bad way in January. I've been on very nearly a straight run for 6 months basically barring a few attempts at detox and a hospitalization for a suicide attempt. Twice I stayed two nights at a buddies where I didn't smoke because his place, he accepts what I do but didn't want it and I didn't want to use truly.. still don't. So I'd try but fuck.

Now I'm severe, like I keep the daily amt fairly low and trying to cut down but I just can't fuckin stop. I'm feeling a little bit aggravated the last couple days more than usual. I think if I do anything to escalate, or get to stressed, or anything that's a trip right back to psycholand. Already had a few bad days end of March / start of April.

It's pretty hellish to go through. And I think that once it's happened a number of times and it's become associated, then especially it'll come back around to panic and crazy thoughts again. My suggestion, to meth or not to meth? Meth's for naught, so if I were you, I would not!

 

[Katiekatkat]

This is only the beginning. I know you said you used around for many years, from freshman year til early 30s, and didn't have the panic attacks. I think though since it's started, having that experience now you might be triggered into more attacks if you smoke. Just speaking from personal experience with it and other stuff too.

I used to green out so often at a point with pot like 14/15 it's never been the same. I still smoked here and there, like often at points and months off whenever, but not a high dose usually..

26 I got a medical card cause I found out high CBD strains were better for me. Smoked a bunch to take he edge off all the meth I was on, which was in fact driving me nuts.

Meth was so fucked up for me back then. Total psycho in the end. I "quit" just shy of turning 27. I'd picked up a few times over the next year though, and I'd go into a really bad state almost every time. The few little periods I'd use around last summer and fall t wasnt too bad. I didn't get too deep though, yet.

I picked up again in a really bad way in January. I've been on very nearly a straight run for 6 months basically barring a few attempts at detox and a hospitalization for a suicide attempt. Twice I stayed two nights at a buddies where I didn't smoke because his place, he accepts what I do but didn't want it and I didn't want to use truly.. still don't. So I'd try but fuck.

Now I'm severe, like I keep the daily amt fairly low and trying to cut down but I just can't fuckin stop. I'm feeling a little bit aggravated the last couple days more than usual. I think if I do anything to escalate, or get to stressed, or anything that's a trip right back to psycholand. Already had a few bad days end of March / start of April.

It's pretty hellish to go through. And I think that once it's happened a number of times and it's become associated, then especially it'll come back around to panic and crazy thoughts again. My suggestion, to meth or not to meth? Meth's for naught, so if I were you, I would not!

For sure, I know all about meth induced psychosis. I've been there a few times. Still, even in psychosis, I never felt the way these last 3 attempts have made me feel. I just want an idea of what it is or if it's just me.

I hope you work it out and that everything gets better for you. I'm definitely done for the time being, unless by some miracle someone has real fire.

But things seem to be way different from 3 years ago. And all the years before that.

 

[Joey]

For sure, I know all about meth induced psychosis. I've been there a few times. Still, even in psychosis, I never felt the way these last 3 attempts have made me feel. I just want an idea of what it is or if it's just me.

I hope you work it out and that everything gets better for you. I'm definitely done for the time being, unless by some miracle someone has real fire.

But things seem to be way different from 3 years ago. And all the years before that.

I've heard the quality is pretty much bunk compared to back in the day 10-20 years ago. Gets worse all the time the last 5, maybe a little more, cause the scene is fucked aka fent and there's no shits given whatsoever a lot of places I notice...

Young people, especially teenage/early 20s kids today are more chemically entrenched than ever when they're using, and I kind of saw it happen because I'm not that much older then that. In talking like 5-10 years younger. My sister's age..

Maybe I'm just less naive about something that was always bad too about the attitude around this shit, and it's horrible on the street, and in these shitty places, and everyone's had a rough life one way or another.

But the level of sheer recklessness, criminality, violence, thieves, manipulators, abusive fucks, the hardest habits are so often in the hands of YOUNG people like HS/College age and they're fucking each other over in the shelter system at the end of it and no sense or respect ..

i was a fuckhead too and so we're lots of people but I'm positive that the scene and the drugs themselves are getting worse. And worse. Can't even go to rehab really these days in global pandemic lol and resources are closed or scaled back completely. I'm glad you have it in you to stay off, its the best way to be.

I'm fucked up sorry for the rant.

 

[Katiekatkat]

I've heard the quality is pretty much bunk compared to back in the day 10-20 years ago. Gets worse all the time the last 5, maybe a little more, cause the scene is fucked aka fent and there's no shits given whatsoever a lot of places I notice...

Young people, especially teenage/early 20s kids today are more chemically entrenched than ever when they're using, and I kind of saw it happen because I'm not that much older then that. In talking like 5-10 years younger. My sister's age..

Maybe I'm just less naive about something that was always bad too about the attitude around this shit, and it's horrible on the street, and in these shitty places, and everyone's had a rough life one way or another.

But the level of sheer recklessness, criminality, violence, thieves, manipulators, abusive fucks, the hardest habits are so often in the hands of YOUNG people like HS/College age and they're fucking each other over in the shelter system at the end of it and no sense or respect ..

i was a fuckhead too and so we're lots of people but I'm positive that the scene and the drugs themselves are getting worse. And worse. Can't even go to rehab really these days in global pandemic lol and resources are closed or scaled back completely. I'm glad you have it in you to stay off, its the best way to be.

I'm fucked up sorry for the rant.

It's all good. I feel you. Things can get better though. I did it. I never thought it was possible for me. I have been in and out of rehab and homelessness until my early 30's. I always said I would never stop. I hate rehab and counseling and I still hate rehab and that whole business. When I got clean I went to a detox and started my life over myself because I wanted to. I went to college and got an AA and now I'm getting a bachelor's degree with straight A's at 35. It isn't easy, I can't handle things well, it takes a lot for me to do normal things. The last 3 years was the longest I had been sober. But I got it in my head I wanted to feel it again, and I did. The first bag was just like the old days. Everything else has got to be some kind of garbage I've never had before.

You can get out of it. If I can do it and achieve what I have been achieving, you can too, in your own way.

 

[Meth novice 79]

Pot has been getting me like this recently too.

Freaked myself the fuck out one night recently on cookies, sat bolt upright in bed suddenly, terrified that I couldn’t breathe and was having a heart attack.

I’ve noticed over the years that each time I quit then come back to weed it makes me a little more paranoid til I got to this point you are at now.

 

[Katiekatkat]

Pot has been getting me like this recently too.

Freaked myself the fuck out one night recently on cookies, sat bolt upright in bed suddenly, terrified that I couldn’t breathe and was having a heart attack.

I’ve noticed over the years that each time I quit then come back to weed it makes me a little more paranoid til I got to this point you are at now.

I never liked pot because it always gave me bad anxiety and just always feel meh ...and because it causes one to over eat. I never understood how anyone finds it worth doing same with alcohol. No thanks.

Sorry

 

[VVanderburg]

Meth changed where Swim lives around 2013 or 2014. Swims home boy said it was going to change and sure enough a few months later.... And ever since. Swim said, that the first time someone does it.. it is very much like the old dope. But tolarence sky rockets after that. Sometimes your heart is racing but don't feel like moving. Some times just hitting it once after doing it, it makes you very sleepy. Swim never heard anyone staying up for days like which would happen back in the day just by mistake. Swim does know that it's not a cut, it's down to the molecular level. Swim heard on the streets that it's not the cooks doing it, but it's the Chinese Pharma companys that supply the Mexicans the Psudophedrine. They changed chemistry. Not sure if this is true but it's the best explanation Swim has heard.

Say, where would Swim send a pebble he found on the streets for testing that is safe?

P.S. Swim said cold tone wash, then recrystallization, cure, and second cold tone wash does seem to help get it back to the above said dope if it is cut on top of it all .

 

[Marduk04]

Well i have seen a big drop in quality this last decade . 10 years before that it was pure , made with real E. So i would say its what its made with makes all the difference . And up in Can. where im from fent. mixed havent noticed it . Shit up here is doable . Nothing else around . Lol.

 

[Marduk04]

Meth changed where Swim lives around 2013 or 2014. Swims home boy said it was going to change and sure enough a few months later.... And ever since. Swim said, that the first time someone does it.. it is very much like the old dope. But tolarence sky rockets after that. Sometimes your heart is racing but don't feel like moving. Some times just hitting it once after doing it, it makes you very sleepy. Swim never heard anyone staying up for days like which would happen back in the day just by mistake. Swim does know that it's not a cut, it's down to the molecular level. Swim heard on the streets that it's not the cooks doing it, but it's the Chinese Pharma companys that supply the Mexicans the Psudophedrine. They changed chemistry. Not sure if this is true but it's the best explanation Swim has heard.

Say, where would Swim send a pebble he found on the streets for testing that is safe?

P.S. Swim said cold tone wash, then recrystallization, cure, and second cold tone wash does seem to help get it back to the above said dope if it is cut on top of it all .

I heard that to that pharma. changed there chemicals to hinder the production it only makes sense the big war on D.

 

[Katiekatkat]

Meth changed where Swim lives around 2013 or 2014. Swims home boy said it was going to change and sure enough a few months later.... And ever since. Swim said, that the first time someone does it.. it is very much like the old dope. But tolarence sky rockets after that. Sometimes your heart is racing but don't feel like moving. Some times just hitting it once after doing it, it makes you very sleepy. Swim never heard anyone staying up for days like which would happen back in the day just by mistake. Swim does know that it's not a cut, it's down to the molecular level. Swim heard on the streets that it's not the cooks doing it, but it's the Chinese Pharma companys that supply the Mexicans the Psudophedrine. They changed chemistry. Not sure if this is true but it's the best explanation Swim has heard.

Say, where would Swim send a pebble he found on the streets for testing that is safe?

P.S. Swim said cold tone wash, then recrystallization, cure, and second cold tone wash does seem to help get it back to the above said dope if it is cut on top of it all .

I'm afraid to tone wash, I feel like I will ruin it or burn/poison myself worse. Maybe i'll ask someone.

I stopped using Oct. 2017, in nor cal everything ever got was bomb to decent. So this is a shock to me, and totally unexpected. I was way too eager. But even weak shit never did caused me to feel like this.
I hope that's not true about the Chinese, but that's what I've felt like for sure. All of my old homies did say that it was hard to find now because of covid, and there has been a switch to easily accessible black, hard to find clear. Whack.

 

[Katiekatkat]

I heard that to that pharma. changed there chemicals to hinder the production it only makes sense the big war on D.

Pharma is so selfish. They just want to control the flow of $$$$$$

 

[Jabberwocky]

Pot has been getting me like this recently too.

Freaked myself the fuck out one night recently on cookies, sat bolt upright in bed suddenly, terrified that I couldn’t breathe and was having a heart attack.

I’ve noticed over the years that each time I quit then come back to weed it makes me a little more paranoid til I got to this point you are at now.

That happened to me once and I couldn't touch weed ever again. There's a thread on it somewhere. Lot's of people have a similar experience of suddenly weed making them paranoid and anxious. It's a thing.

 

[Flower Fairy]

That happened to me once and I couldn't touch weed ever again. There's a thread on it somewhere. Lot's of people have a similar experience of suddenly weed making them paranoid and anxious. It's a thing.

Yeah same, it's because it's made so strongly with high levels of THC now, they've bred the plants to be low in CBD (CBD lowers the anxiety people get from THC) so then you get really strong weed that has hardly any CBD in it but loads of THC so it gets people fucked, but makes alot of people anxious and paranoid

I used to love weed, the taste the smell etc is still lovely I just can't smoke it anymore

 

[Boogaloo1502]

That happened to me once and I couldn't touch weed ever again. There's a thread on it somewhere. Lot's of people have a similar experience of suddenly weed making them paranoid and anxious. It's a thing.

Right here, brother. Terrible thing.