TheThunderbird
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2016
- Messages
- 1
I have experienced infinity.
And I?€™m sorry, but not for why you think.
I don?€™t know where to start, or how much backstory to give so let me just begin with a bit of backstory behind my trip.
I woke up groggy from experimenting with DMT the last night, I didn?€™t get enough sleep because I didn?€™t want to stop looking at the wonderful world long enough, and I worked a hectic 8.5 hour shift. I finally ride my bike back home and I?€™m tired when I get there, I know I should sleep but a free Saturday night was to tempting. I started by cutting apart the 400ug gummy so I have a ~25ug dose, thinking it will just be a little pickmeup, and I start drinking. I?€™m about 4 beers deep when I?€™m finally ready to go out, but before I go out I take another ~50ug. I remembered halfway there that I lost my wallet so I didn?€™t have my ID.
I told the driver I realized this and asked him to take me back, the driver laughed and started to take me back but halfway through decided he couldn?€™t stop the uber trip unless he got to the destination, so he turned us around again and at this point I decided to walk down the street exploring. I happened upon a couple friendly bums drinking out in this park, and I walked up to ask one of them for a smoke, but I?€™m tripping pretty hard by now so obviously I explain to them my whole situation and they had a pretty good laugh. We sat there and talked about drugs, from where the LSD was on the gummy to air-activated-weed to DMT. Commiserate that the point of life is nothing more than all about money. I wasn?€™t sure if I believe this 100%, but in the moment I was willing to go with it. Eventually I said goodbye to the two gents in the park and wandered across the street into a pinball arcade, where I had a combination of feeling
1.?€hmm, this isn?€™t as visual as I thought a good trip in an arcade would be?€ and,
2.?€I don?€™t want to take this right now cause how can I stay awake for 12 more hours?€??€ and
3.?€no I really do want to take this LSD?€
I popped the rest of the gummy but eventually left before I had finished playing what I payed for. I walked back out into the cold and tried get another uber which didn?€™t work because of the LSD-Tech-Rift. Eventually I stopped at a Mcdonalds and fixed the problem with uber. I decided not to stay and get food because I was getting worried the LSD was coming on far stronger than I thought and I needed to get back home where I thought could enjoy the trip no matter how crazy things got. I felt like I was in a trance as I walked out to the uber and as soon as I got in I hid away in my phone.
I finally made it home and made my way upstairs wandering into the bathroom to take my contacts out. Once I was there I found myself staring into the mirror telling myself ?€œThis isn?€™t even that much acid, I?€™m not even seeing much of everything?€. I walk over and climb into bed, after getting caught in one of those annoying multiple problem LSD time loops where you just waste time starting to do one thing before switching to another and another until you remember the original problem and start that all over again. When I finally had made it to bed I knew I still had a lot of time to kill, but I also knew how tired I was and how badly I wanted to go to sleep. I actually tried to ?€œbeat?€ LSD and fall asleep even though I was tripping ballz. Eventually my mind started working overtime, I pictured a timeline and lsd was like the point on the timeline where you clicked on it and dragged it down, out of sight into infinity, where literally anything is possible, then it slowly eases you back into normal existence. I thought I couldn?€™t sleep because I was sure light=energy and if I can?€™t get all the light out of my eyes then I can?€™t stop recieving the energy and fall asleep. During this realization I leaned into my pillow to try and snuffle out the energy. That?€™s when I realized I was having insane closed eye visuals, almost DMT like. Somehow even though there was absolutely no light reaching my eyes I could still see something. I tried to dive into it and make sense of it but suddenly I felt a dark presence, as if some evil being or beings were forcing their way through into my dimension. It was as if a cloud of dark spirits invading my room. I panicked and jumped up, switching on the light, and flushed them away with my thoughts.
I started chatting with my friend Molly (I dump all kinds of crazy notions on her every time I trip) where I spiralled into another time loop, every time I started something I got distracted by things and came back to the first task forgetting that I was ever even in the loop in the first place. It all started when I decided I was going to smoke a bowl before going back to tripping. Once I had everything I needed and was about to open the window to smoke it I was distracted by how dry my mouth was, I put the piece down to drink so I would enjoy it more, them thinking music would make it better, so I started that process, but that would remind me to talk to Molly about something, then I tried to smoke only to realize my mouth was dry and starting the whole cycle over again. This repeated for infinity, millions of years worth of thoughts all condensed into a ?€œreal life?€ period of about 2 hours. I felt myself sinking into insanity each time I looped around. Finally I tore myself out of the loop, dropped everything and lunged out the window, lighting the bowl pulling the parachute on the trip.
I really just added another drug that pulled me in a completely different direction, ripped the part of the ego that was sinking into insanity away from my true being. All the sudden I had shattered something or broken through and suddenly I was in the presence of truth, but I had to experience all of it, from the best to worst. I would smoke, then the darkness formed into a hologram room, re-calibrating my brain, so I could create things. I slowly learned to shape color and sounds together to form things,as if it was a hologram room and I could simulate anything I wanted. I eventually stopped playing and stare at my pipe, that was when I created a breach in the fabric of the universe. I finally looked up and it was like I had pulled an inter-dimensional puzzle piece, gazing at the truth and power behind it. There was nothing but a three dimensional cubic grid, I saw the framework. Then the thought occurred to me, ?€œHow am I going to seal this up? How am I going to get back? To sanity, to that world where other people are so that I can tell them about this??€.
That is when I started to die, or live, or retreat back into this reality, I?€™m still not sure what to call it. I was completely shattered into an infinite amount of pieces and lives. Somehow I was aware of every single version of myself that had ever existed from the moment I was conceived until now, and we all worked trying to solve the problem. I conversed with my infant self and some of us collaborated, but there were others who wanted to work alone. I lived countless lives in that window, all searching for the way back, some of them deciding to smoke more, I remember thinking, ?€œmight as well get fucked up while I?€™m trying to fix the universe?€ and lighting another hit before zooming off into another life or dimension. Some of us decided to pull inside to seek external help, I remember trying to turn music on and realizing I was killing either the version of myself that wasn?€™t listening or the one that was. By turning up or down the volume, it was like I was sucking all the life out one or the other of myself but neither produced any music.
I had to decide exactly what kind of person I wanted to be when I pieced together the version of me that was going to return. This was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I wrestled with deciding my entire life before knowing what exactly was going to happen. I went through every single possibility of my life, wrestling with ungodly problems in the loop. Watching it get more and more complex until it blossomed into an expanding infinite mass of possibilities, spending my life with every person I had ever met, then killing that self off to live with someone else and learn from them, repeated until I could take it no more. I rolled back onto the bed and focused on one point
.
A single black pixel out of which I recreated the entire universe the way I want it to be. I slowly packed more of what I believed to be myself into where I used to be and came up with the me I wanted to live with. Wanted is the wrong word, willing but not wanting, willing to come back and just barely forget enough, becoming the worst possible me that I could actually live with but the best possible me that would fit into this physical realm. I was created out of this singularity. A man again to experience this universe and share the truth with other people. So what I?€™m trying to say is I?€™m sorry, but you?€™re in the world I created. Although what I?€™m also saying is you have the same power within yourself.
(Or I?€™m just crazy and and addict who will come up with anything to excuse the further use of drugs. There is a duality there, and infinite power in the fact that you don?€™t know. In all of life, there are always choices we are forced to make. We may never know in the end if they are the right or wrong ones, we just have to trust and have faith in ourselves to show us the correct way.)
FOOTNOTES/ThunderBITS
Image you could speed up and expand your mind until you could navigate and hold all the infinite possibilities and storylines and lives you live all at the same time, you could get lost and confused in it, and THAT is the beauty of infinity, getting lost in it. But eventually you could navigate out into this one, the literally best hand crafted perfect universe for you to experience, because it was made by you, and it?€™s the only thing that ever could have been.
Light = Energy = Fractals = Math = Matter = Spirit = Infinity
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_lsd
substancecode_lysergamides
substancecode_marijuana
substancecode_cannabis
_combo_
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_glowing
exptype_spiritual
exptype_difficult
roacode_sublingual
roacode_smoked
roacode_inhaled
And I?€™m sorry, but not for why you think.
I don?€™t know where to start, or how much backstory to give so let me just begin with a bit of backstory behind my trip.
I woke up groggy from experimenting with DMT the last night, I didn?€™t get enough sleep because I didn?€™t want to stop looking at the wonderful world long enough, and I worked a hectic 8.5 hour shift. I finally ride my bike back home and I?€™m tired when I get there, I know I should sleep but a free Saturday night was to tempting. I started by cutting apart the 400ug gummy so I have a ~25ug dose, thinking it will just be a little pickmeup, and I start drinking. I?€™m about 4 beers deep when I?€™m finally ready to go out, but before I go out I take another ~50ug. I remembered halfway there that I lost my wallet so I didn?€™t have my ID.
I told the driver I realized this and asked him to take me back, the driver laughed and started to take me back but halfway through decided he couldn?€™t stop the uber trip unless he got to the destination, so he turned us around again and at this point I decided to walk down the street exploring. I happened upon a couple friendly bums drinking out in this park, and I walked up to ask one of them for a smoke, but I?€™m tripping pretty hard by now so obviously I explain to them my whole situation and they had a pretty good laugh. We sat there and talked about drugs, from where the LSD was on the gummy to air-activated-weed to DMT. Commiserate that the point of life is nothing more than all about money. I wasn?€™t sure if I believe this 100%, but in the moment I was willing to go with it. Eventually I said goodbye to the two gents in the park and wandered across the street into a pinball arcade, where I had a combination of feeling
1.?€hmm, this isn?€™t as visual as I thought a good trip in an arcade would be?€ and,
2.?€I don?€™t want to take this right now cause how can I stay awake for 12 more hours?€??€ and
3.?€no I really do want to take this LSD?€
I popped the rest of the gummy but eventually left before I had finished playing what I payed for. I walked back out into the cold and tried get another uber which didn?€™t work because of the LSD-Tech-Rift. Eventually I stopped at a Mcdonalds and fixed the problem with uber. I decided not to stay and get food because I was getting worried the LSD was coming on far stronger than I thought and I needed to get back home where I thought could enjoy the trip no matter how crazy things got. I felt like I was in a trance as I walked out to the uber and as soon as I got in I hid away in my phone.
I finally made it home and made my way upstairs wandering into the bathroom to take my contacts out. Once I was there I found myself staring into the mirror telling myself ?€œThis isn?€™t even that much acid, I?€™m not even seeing much of everything?€. I walk over and climb into bed, after getting caught in one of those annoying multiple problem LSD time loops where you just waste time starting to do one thing before switching to another and another until you remember the original problem and start that all over again. When I finally had made it to bed I knew I still had a lot of time to kill, but I also knew how tired I was and how badly I wanted to go to sleep. I actually tried to ?€œbeat?€ LSD and fall asleep even though I was tripping ballz. Eventually my mind started working overtime, I pictured a timeline and lsd was like the point on the timeline where you clicked on it and dragged it down, out of sight into infinity, where literally anything is possible, then it slowly eases you back into normal existence. I thought I couldn?€™t sleep because I was sure light=energy and if I can?€™t get all the light out of my eyes then I can?€™t stop recieving the energy and fall asleep. During this realization I leaned into my pillow to try and snuffle out the energy. That?€™s when I realized I was having insane closed eye visuals, almost DMT like. Somehow even though there was absolutely no light reaching my eyes I could still see something. I tried to dive into it and make sense of it but suddenly I felt a dark presence, as if some evil being or beings were forcing their way through into my dimension. It was as if a cloud of dark spirits invading my room. I panicked and jumped up, switching on the light, and flushed them away with my thoughts.
I started chatting with my friend Molly (I dump all kinds of crazy notions on her every time I trip) where I spiralled into another time loop, every time I started something I got distracted by things and came back to the first task forgetting that I was ever even in the loop in the first place. It all started when I decided I was going to smoke a bowl before going back to tripping. Once I had everything I needed and was about to open the window to smoke it I was distracted by how dry my mouth was, I put the piece down to drink so I would enjoy it more, them thinking music would make it better, so I started that process, but that would remind me to talk to Molly about something, then I tried to smoke only to realize my mouth was dry and starting the whole cycle over again. This repeated for infinity, millions of years worth of thoughts all condensed into a ?€œreal life?€ period of about 2 hours. I felt myself sinking into insanity each time I looped around. Finally I tore myself out of the loop, dropped everything and lunged out the window, lighting the bowl pulling the parachute on the trip.
I really just added another drug that pulled me in a completely different direction, ripped the part of the ego that was sinking into insanity away from my true being. All the sudden I had shattered something or broken through and suddenly I was in the presence of truth, but I had to experience all of it, from the best to worst. I would smoke, then the darkness formed into a hologram room, re-calibrating my brain, so I could create things. I slowly learned to shape color and sounds together to form things,as if it was a hologram room and I could simulate anything I wanted. I eventually stopped playing and stare at my pipe, that was when I created a breach in the fabric of the universe. I finally looked up and it was like I had pulled an inter-dimensional puzzle piece, gazing at the truth and power behind it. There was nothing but a three dimensional cubic grid, I saw the framework. Then the thought occurred to me, ?€œHow am I going to seal this up? How am I going to get back? To sanity, to that world where other people are so that I can tell them about this??€.
That is when I started to die, or live, or retreat back into this reality, I?€™m still not sure what to call it. I was completely shattered into an infinite amount of pieces and lives. Somehow I was aware of every single version of myself that had ever existed from the moment I was conceived until now, and we all worked trying to solve the problem. I conversed with my infant self and some of us collaborated, but there were others who wanted to work alone. I lived countless lives in that window, all searching for the way back, some of them deciding to smoke more, I remember thinking, ?€œmight as well get fucked up while I?€™m trying to fix the universe?€ and lighting another hit before zooming off into another life or dimension. Some of us decided to pull inside to seek external help, I remember trying to turn music on and realizing I was killing either the version of myself that wasn?€™t listening or the one that was. By turning up or down the volume, it was like I was sucking all the life out one or the other of myself but neither produced any music.
I had to decide exactly what kind of person I wanted to be when I pieced together the version of me that was going to return. This was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I wrestled with deciding my entire life before knowing what exactly was going to happen. I went through every single possibility of my life, wrestling with ungodly problems in the loop. Watching it get more and more complex until it blossomed into an expanding infinite mass of possibilities, spending my life with every person I had ever met, then killing that self off to live with someone else and learn from them, repeated until I could take it no more. I rolled back onto the bed and focused on one point
.
A single black pixel out of which I recreated the entire universe the way I want it to be. I slowly packed more of what I believed to be myself into where I used to be and came up with the me I wanted to live with. Wanted is the wrong word, willing but not wanting, willing to come back and just barely forget enough, becoming the worst possible me that I could actually live with but the best possible me that would fit into this physical realm. I was created out of this singularity. A man again to experience this universe and share the truth with other people. So what I?€™m trying to say is I?€™m sorry, but you?€™re in the world I created. Although what I?€™m also saying is you have the same power within yourself.
(Or I?€™m just crazy and and addict who will come up with anything to excuse the further use of drugs. There is a duality there, and infinite power in the fact that you don?€™t know. In all of life, there are always choices we are forced to make. We may never know in the end if they are the right or wrong ones, we just have to trust and have faith in ourselves to show us the correct way.)
FOOTNOTES/ThunderBITS
Image you could speed up and expand your mind until you could navigate and hold all the infinite possibilities and storylines and lives you live all at the same time, you could get lost and confused in it, and THAT is the beauty of infinity, getting lost in it. But eventually you could navigate out into this one, the literally best hand crafted perfect universe for you to experience, because it was made by you, and it?€™s the only thing that ever could have been.
Light = Energy = Fractals = Math = Matter = Spirit = Infinity
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_lsd
substancecode_lysergamides
substancecode_marijuana
substancecode_cannabis
_combo_
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_glowing
exptype_spiritual
exptype_difficult
roacode_sublingual
roacode_smoked
roacode_inhaled
Last edited by a moderator: