Is this a normal feeling? (Experience) (Am I gay or what?)

[PeachyyBoy]

Hey, my question is, Is this a normal phase? Or what should I do? Thanks
,
Ever since one of the hottest girls in my school slapped my ass and comments were made that i looked like miley cyrus (because of my hair style and hair colour, (blonde),i began to feel femanine,


I started to have an obsession with ass and i started to compare my body with girls the same age as me (17). I realised i had an unusually big "ghetto booty" for a boy and that my figure sort of matched a girls, i was a petite ,slim, golden brown skinned boy with a larger than average sized ass with hardly any hair in my private parts or my legs (however i had no tits, since i'm a boy obviously i wouldn't have any). I wasn't gay but, i was fascinated by my body and began to feel a bit weird because of my figure.


i looked online to see if it was normal for a boy to feel this way and found out it was pretty common, through searching for 'boy with big ass' i eventually fell into the trap of watching porn, watching teen girls with petite bodies turned me on and i after a while i started watching 'trans porn'. Watching boys who turned into girls being made happy appealed to me but i didn't know why.


i started experimenting with my body and playing with myself like i had never done before, twerking, feeling my ass and nipples, even anal play.
i felt like i was a girl, the only difference was i had a dick.
The more porn i watched the more i wanted to explore myself, after a while i started sneaking around my moms underwear.


This is when things changed for me, wearing tight bras and pink panties that complimented my body made me want to show off myself, i felt more of a desire for cock and wanted to feel what it would be like to have a dick infront of me (not mine) and see what it thought of my body , At the same time I realised what was happening and didnt' want to go down this route, but i was finding it hard to resist.


There was no way i was going to go and find a guy to fuck me as i couldn't live with myself if i had got caught, or if someone found out i felt this way, so instead i made a fake skype profile and found a site where i could find random guys to talk to.
I was now talking with guys through text (pretending to be a girl), one thing lead to another and i found myself taking pictures of my back, ass and legs for the guys pleasure,


I took pictures of myself in panties and bras which i would take after they were drying after being in the washing machine. People were thinking i was a real girl and were giving me compliments , calling me "hot" and "perfect" saying my ass was "peachy" , whilst saying what they would do to me.
I felt happy with myself, my body and my little secret, but i wanted more.


One day I was home alone, and was feeling really horny, I went on Skype and a guy asked me to go on cam, this was something i would never have done before, but today i was willing to do it , i don't know what came over me,


I told him i will but won't show my face as i was shy, I grabbed some panties, slipped them on, positioned myself and opened my cam, i was getting so many compliments about my teen ass and legs, the guy even started jerking off.

I was so horny that I would have sucked a guys cock or let him fuck me in my ass, if one was next to me,


But I felt bad with myself and told him that I was a guy and blocked him.


No matter how guilty I felt that i misled a guy into thinking i was a girl with my body, I still wanted to go back on cam with another guy and make him blow his load whilst thinking about me, wishing he could give me a great time,


A while later I went on Skype and showed a guy some pics whilst he was jerking off, i talked him through it , saying i would love to be with him, how i'd bounce on his cock and how i'd let him cum on my lips , he came and i felt so special, but i then felt guilty and told him i was a boy.


I apologized but i still felt guilty, I wanted this whole thing about me being a girl to stop but i didn't know how, i didn't want to become depressed.
I felt that the only way I could make this thing come to and end , was to feel the things i've been saying to these guys.


I went to the bathroom and put a pair of tight pink panties on that hugged my ass and a sport bra, i went on my knees and put my ass in the air, closed my eyes and spoke to myself in my mind , i could feel my heart racing as if i was actually about to get fucked for the first time, i told myself "i'm going to be a good girl and take it well,"


I slowly lifted up the bra, slowly pulled my panties down how a guy would to me, and started playing with myself.
I put my finger up my ass and imagined it was a cock pounding me, it felt so amazing.


My body felt so sensative, i was being fucked by myself whilst holding onto my would be tits.


After a while the excitement and energy got so much and i was about to cum,


I laid on my back put my legs over my head and prepared for a facial, i was smiling whilst looking into my own cock, ready for my load, it felt like an acomplishment and i came onto my own smile.


I was now in the same situation as the girl at the end of the porn videos i watched, my lips were covered in cum and i knew this would be the end.
I lowered my legs and laid with a cum covered face, astonished with what i had just done,

 

[pofacedhoe]

this is ridiculous.

most gay people dont frame their confusion as a porn story with ridiculous lines like

"i came onto my own smile"

"i went on my knees and put my ass in the air, closed my eyes and spoke to myself in my mind"