Just take a dose tomorrow, 250mg or something, take some more a few days after, see how it goes you know. Go somewhere you haven't been before, take music with you. You understand what I'm saying? I believe you need some spontaneity to these things, 250mg isn't gonna kill you, it might even be fun, challenge yourself on it, do something you wouldn't otherwise.. like going on a bike ride on it or something, and ride fast as fuck
feel the wind freezing your ears off, hear everything around you. Don't stay home, it'll only remind you of the things you hate there. If you didn't feel anything, so be it, take more next time, if you felt it, great, maybe take more next time too. If you hated it, again, so be it, at least you tried
I get wanting to wait until you've got all your shit together, but nobody ever gets all their shit together, so why not say 'fuck it' and try something as innocent as 250mg while actively trying to make a fun day out of it, there's not much to lose.
You just can't put that much pressure on one full trip, you will most likely come out disappointed, or it won't be enough of a kickstart or something. By building up slowly you'll get more of a feel how you react, and how you work with it, it goes without saying that full doses are much more intense, but as a bonus you get an indication of how potent they are too.
I hope to hear from your experiment soon :D I get that it's not done to 'pressure' people into taking drugs, but I've seen you talking about those shrooms for ages man
