I dont know how to tell my boyfriend I relasped...

[TheDrugsDontWork96]

I want to tell him... But he told me if I did he would leave me.. We met using stimulants (methamphetamines) together. One of my best friend uses currently still. He is a gay friend. My boyfriend didnt want me to remain contact with so-spoken-of-friend. But he gave me a place to stay when I had no where else to go or had a fight with my family which is dsyfunctional. I did meth last night and currently have a gram on me. I havent even touched the gram since I have been home. Its currently 9 am and I came home at 5 am. I feel like there is a possible way to not be as bad on it as I was if i am not surrounded with it all the time. I live with my boyfriend but currently and house/pet sitting for my grandparents. I feel stuck. I care about my best friend as well as my boyfriend but I dont know what to do. I dont live with my best friend who uses often anymore. I was a month sober. I dont know how to approach him about it. My gay friend wants to rekindle their friendship (my gay friend introduced us). Its hard. Am I a bad person for wanting to just chill and get high in moderation sometimes? I dont plan on doing it as often as I was. I dont want to lose my boyfriend but him telling me to stay sober is hypocritical when he drinks everyday. I know methamphetamine is way worse than alcohol but I never was a one for downers.

 

[*CUNT*]

Don't be hard on yourself about this, you are going through what most addicts in relationships do and it is not likely to be just this one time.

You don't have to tell your bf anything about it.

If you do tell him and he reacts badly then at least you were honest with him.

It's sort of understsndable that he is wanting distance from a drug using mate but he can't restrict you from your friends .

Love is meant to be patient and kind, thus guy sounds lije it's either by his rules regardless of what you are going through and who needs that shit!

What you do with your sobriety or drug use is up to you. It's hard to quit when there are people using in your life but not impossible .

Dies your partner ever go out with addict mates or possibly sneak drug use?

 

[pofacedhoe]

speed just creeps up on you

semi regular use is hard to maintain

the comedowns are just super shit from it

it has to be you that wants to not do something, weather its speed or booze etc. personal choice based upon outcomes

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

Please do not beat yourself up for relapsing, it is a learning experience not a failure. If you have not done so already, get rid of the meth, and do not use it or consider using it again. Since you are addicted to meth, moderation or using it socially the way non-addicted people drink or smoke herb is not an option.

You should tell your boyfriend, but also go to NA meetings or CMA (crystal meth anonymous) meetings and work with a sponsor. Good luck, and just treat this as a learning experience. Also, be extremely careful that you do not become addicted to other drugs besides meth. I know people who became addicted to one hard or soft drug, and they wound up addicted to other hard or soft drugs as substitute addictions.

About your friend that you used meth with, it sounds drastic or mean but cut him out of your life right now, until he gets sober and stops using meth and other hard drugs. Right now you do not need someone in your life who is using meth or other hard drugs, and you need to focus on yourself and getting sober again.

 

[Nightrider19]

Right there you are owning your relapse.

The way I see it is, if you don’t tell him and you do decide to use in “moderation” you will come to this exact situation everytime.

I had a similar situation: I didn’t want a relationship where I couldn’t talk freely or hide who I am because it’s “wrong” to use.
My best friend hates meth but I am open to her about it to.

You can’t start a relationship with a lie, even with good intentions. Just decide how you want to move forward.

BTW - a month is a huge achievement.

You are only human ??

 

[Lucy20]

Relapses happen to all of us. Honesty is the best but if you no plans of doing it again or going around your drug friend not knowing wouldn't hurt him

 

[Pretty_Diamonds]

I agree with the above. Every time you use, you will be in the same situation. Feeling guilty. Feeling stuck. Feeling like you're at an impasse. Make a decision to come clean now, or hide it forever until you are caught.

 

[LucidSDreamr]

if you can chalk it up to just a slip up...and get back on the path to sobriety without him knowing the better, i would not tell him. I've been through this a lot, its nice to confess your sins and lies to the SO as a form of holding yourself accountable, but at a certain point its a selfish move and does not accomplish anything other than upsetting and worrying them.