littlesmg88
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2016
- Messages
- 18
I was diagnosed and prescribed adderall 13 years ago for inattentive ADD. It drastically improved my grades!
Shortly out of highschool I somehow began taking them more than prescribed, the details are fuzzy there as to why etc. but its been 7 or 8 years now of the same montly vicious cycle. I get my script, I take them more often than I am supposed to ( a few times a day because I always feel they wear offf to quick and my genesight tests showed I metabolize them quickly and my docs refused to up my dosage anymore due to me getting older) So I run out after 2 weeks. Spend a week sleeping NON-stop- unable to function, miss work etc. The the other week I'm functional but can't stop binge-eating, then I get a refill and it starts all over again.
I have been researching and asking advice all over the place for years on how to get a control on this crap but I have gotten too good at finding a way to overcome any obstacle to get to my meds when I want them. I am currently on Vyvanse and Strattera. I had the courage to swap the adderall for the strattera in hopes of changing my habit somehow. But I still ran out early.
previous to that, starting last year, I was on both adderall and vyvanse because not only do I have ADD but a sleep test showed I havea circadium rythm disorder with hypersomnia aka daytime sleepiness, so I need a stimulant in my medication regimen not only for ADD but to keep me awake because without them I've literally almost fallen asleep walking around work or driving. Tests are working up to prove a sublayer of narcolepsy but..........
I feel like theres no more options... in the end the only person who can fix this is me- willpower- self control- which I have no idea how to get!
I plan on going to an NA meeting next week.... I'm scared of anything else, anything changing because for literally HALF of my life this lifestyle/ habit/ addiction is all I've known! PLEASE HELP!
I still havn't gone to NA yet because I ran out of meds the day I started this thread and just got my script filled and obviously couldn't function enough to go to NA.
I did get a job that pays well but its 12 hour shifts, I start in 2 weeks. But I'm worried if I'll be able to keep this job because of how much medication I'll take just to function at work let alone off work= I predict I'll burn through it in a week as opposed to my normal 2 especially since I am now only on ONE stimulant and the stratterra doesn't seem to help me much ( I know it's not a stimulant but I was still hoping that it would produce stimulant like properties like wakefulness or something).
I have been on 40mg Strattera for almost 3 months now and when I started the strattera I had to swap it out for my 10mg adderall so I was only left with 50mg vy (I've been on all strenghts). Honestly, since getting the vyvanse last year, I split the capsule as equally as I can in hopes to stretch out my script longer but that doesn't work.
Last dr appt I was allowed to be prescribed 30mg vy to be taken twice a day, I had hoped that this would make my meds last longer once again and I even split most of those but still ran out at the same time! Thats basically 120 capsules of 15mg vyvanse and still couldn't make it last!
It has gotten to the point that even when I try to ration myself and control my dosages- no matter how I do it it doesn't work!
I should add that when I explained I take them more than prescribed, it is still under what I feel is a safe dosing regimine (a small amount etc. every 4 hours, sometimes 2 hours but no sooner) Because I'm not trying to harm myself I just am trying to keep it active in my system and not let it wear off until I want it to.
I also want to say that I do take them the way I do because I literally cannot function without them. I'm a single mom with a life yanno. & I used to get that "euphoria" in the beginning but I HONESTLY have NOT felt ANY type of euphoria or excitement or high from my medication in LITERALLY 6 years and that was only when I went back on them after giving birth to my child.
Shortly out of highschool I somehow began taking them more than prescribed, the details are fuzzy there as to why etc. but its been 7 or 8 years now of the same montly vicious cycle. I get my script, I take them more often than I am supposed to ( a few times a day because I always feel they wear offf to quick and my genesight tests showed I metabolize them quickly and my docs refused to up my dosage anymore due to me getting older) So I run out after 2 weeks. Spend a week sleeping NON-stop- unable to function, miss work etc. The the other week I'm functional but can't stop binge-eating, then I get a refill and it starts all over again.
I have been researching and asking advice all over the place for years on how to get a control on this crap but I have gotten too good at finding a way to overcome any obstacle to get to my meds when I want them. I am currently on Vyvanse and Strattera. I had the courage to swap the adderall for the strattera in hopes of changing my habit somehow. But I still ran out early.
previous to that, starting last year, I was on both adderall and vyvanse because not only do I have ADD but a sleep test showed I havea circadium rythm disorder with hypersomnia aka daytime sleepiness, so I need a stimulant in my medication regimen not only for ADD but to keep me awake because without them I've literally almost fallen asleep walking around work or driving. Tests are working up to prove a sublayer of narcolepsy but..........
I feel like theres no more options... in the end the only person who can fix this is me- willpower- self control- which I have no idea how to get!
I plan on going to an NA meeting next week.... I'm scared of anything else, anything changing because for literally HALF of my life this lifestyle/ habit/ addiction is all I've known! PLEASE HELP!
I still havn't gone to NA yet because I ran out of meds the day I started this thread and just got my script filled and obviously couldn't function enough to go to NA.
I did get a job that pays well but its 12 hour shifts, I start in 2 weeks. But I'm worried if I'll be able to keep this job because of how much medication I'll take just to function at work let alone off work= I predict I'll burn through it in a week as opposed to my normal 2 especially since I am now only on ONE stimulant and the stratterra doesn't seem to help me much ( I know it's not a stimulant but I was still hoping that it would produce stimulant like properties like wakefulness or something).
I have been on 40mg Strattera for almost 3 months now and when I started the strattera I had to swap it out for my 10mg adderall so I was only left with 50mg vy (I've been on all strenghts). Honestly, since getting the vyvanse last year, I split the capsule as equally as I can in hopes to stretch out my script longer but that doesn't work.
Last dr appt I was allowed to be prescribed 30mg vy to be taken twice a day, I had hoped that this would make my meds last longer once again and I even split most of those but still ran out at the same time! Thats basically 120 capsules of 15mg vyvanse and still couldn't make it last!
It has gotten to the point that even when I try to ration myself and control my dosages- no matter how I do it it doesn't work!
I should add that when I explained I take them more than prescribed, it is still under what I feel is a safe dosing regimine (a small amount etc. every 4 hours, sometimes 2 hours but no sooner) Because I'm not trying to harm myself I just am trying to keep it active in my system and not let it wear off until I want it to.
I also want to say that I do take them the way I do because I literally cannot function without them. I'm a single mom with a life yanno. & I used to get that "euphoria" in the beginning but I HONESTLY have NOT felt ANY type of euphoria or excitement or high from my medication in LITERALLY 6 years and that was only when I went back on them after giving birth to my child.