Yes exactly this but for me its not friends and family it's more a police type thing. I know this shouldn't make sense but I get these episodes where it feels like they're right in front of my door or observing me or something. Police and investigators stalking me and placing irrational fear on me, manipulating my thoughts and my actions.
I smoked a ton of weed like 10 years ago when I was a teenager I have been smoking since I was 14. And when I got my job I went for synthetic/research chemicals due to drug testing. Dutch orange contains jwh as far as I know and that doesn't test positive. It also costs less and I might be slightly addicted because I do get some real cravings when I'm off for more than 2 days. It got really bad when I went in because of my intrusive thoughts/OCD on being stalked. My doctor is the only one I trust with my depression and these thoughts. I got sertralin/antidepressant and when it got worse I also got the lorazepam. I work from home since last year and even got panic attacks at home and locked myself in because I feel like someone will break in or that the police will come busting my doors in. I heard of people getting killed by swat and scary shit like that. I am not dealing and I lay low being unsuspicious most of the time so I wouldn't know why but I'm legit scared of that.
I feel like if I'd stop with the cannabinoids I would not be able to sleep at all. Appreciate your post about controlling these thoughts as I said it was fine the last couple hours I watched no news just drank water and heard music and I was actually real calm for the first time in a week. Hope I can get my shit together eventually but if I go back to regular weed I feel like I'll worry even more about drug tests or police.
Please
@fetuslover123 remember that none of us here are doctors, so if/when an anonymous stranger on Bluelight recommends against using anti-psychotics or any other prescribed medication, DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. A psychiatrist has a minimum of 8 years of schooling to become experts at what they do. These drugs cause different reactions for different people, so just because one person didn't take the meds long enough for them to work properly does not mean they don't work at all. I see a few things that you should do in order to get back to equilibrium.
First, as has been stated many times in this thread already, you must stop with the synthetic weed. I was a social worker in homeless services for four years and have had multiple clients lose their shit because they thought it was a safe replacement for cannabis. It isn't. Check out this brief article, it's like a 5 minute read:
Synthetic cannabinoids, popularly called Spice, are common drugs of abuse in the United States. They are utilized as a substitute for marijuana, primarily for their psychoactive properties. Consumption has been rapidly increasing due to recreational effects, ...
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
Second, report every single thing you told us to your psychiatrist. If he doesn't believe you or brushes it off, then I would heavily consider finding a different psychiatrist. Seriously. I just changed psychiatrists recently because my previous one was an old man and didn't empathize with my situation. My new guy is younger and has more understanding of what I am going through. By the way, I'm diagnosed with shizoaffective disorder and have previously experienced much of what you are experiencing but without the cannabinoids.
Third, if all this continues or worsens after quitting the synthetic weed, please consider going to the nearest emergency room and checking in. Tell them the thoughts you are having and try to get some full time psychiatric care. You will be under observation and will possibly be given sleep meds if needed, at least on a temporary basis. The vast majority of psychiatric stays last no more than a week. Believe me, I've had plenty of them.
I really do hope you get better. Please keep us updated!
